Title: The Breitmann Ballads
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Author: Charles G. Leland
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The Breitmann Ballads
Charles G. Leland
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Table of Contents
The Breitmann Ballads .......................................................................................................................................1
Charles G. Leland....................................................................................................................................1
Preface To the Edition of 1889................................................................................................................3
PREFACE ................................................................................................................................................4
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER.............................................................................................5
HANS BREITMANN'S BARTY............................................................................................................9
BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS..................................................................................................10
BALLAD...............................................................................................................................................12
A BALLAD APOUT DE ROWDIES. ...................................................................................................13
THE PICNIC ..........................................................................................................................................14
I GILI ROMANESKRO........................................................................................................................16
STEINLI VON SLANG........................................................................................................................17
TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN...............................................................................................22
LOVE SONG .........................................................................................................................................24
DER FREISCHUTZ..............................................................................................................................25
WEIN GEIST .........................................................................................................................................28
SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE........................................................................................................30
I. PROLOGUE. .....................................................................................................................................30
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE..........................................................................32
DIE SCHONE WITTWE[9] ..................................................................................................................38
I. VOT DE YANKEE CHAP SUNG. ....................................................................................................38
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT. ....................................................................................39
BREITMANN IN BATTLE..................................................................................................................39
BREITMANN IN MARYLAND..........................................................................................................42
BREITMANN AS A BUMMER ...........................................................................................................44
SECOND PART....................................................................................................................................45
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. ..............................................................................................47
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26] ..........................................................................................................54
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS. ................................................................................................57
BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN ............................................................................................................60
BREITMANN IN POLITICS. ...............................................................................................................64
I.THE NOMINATION........................................................................................................................64
2. THE COMMITTEE OF INSTRUCTION. .....................................................................................65
3. MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE." ............................................66
4.HOW BREITMANN AND SMITH WERE REPORTED TO BE LOGROLLING.....................68
5.HOW THEY HELD THE MASS MEETING. .................................................................................69
6.BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH.................................................................................................70
THE AUTHOR ASSERTS THE VAST INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY OF GERMANS TO
AMERICANS. .......................................................................................................................................72
SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35].....................................73
BREITMANN AS AN UHLAN. ...........................................................................................................76
I. THE VISION. .....................................................................................................................................77
II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON. .....................................................................................................79
III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI......................................................................................................83
IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY. ........................................................................85
V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC..........................................................................................................88
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY....................................................................................................90
EUROPE. ...............................................................................................................................................93
The Breitmann Ballads
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Table of Contents
BREITMANN IN PARIS......................................................................................................................93
BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE. .....................................................................................................95
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT......................................................................................................97
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM.............................................................................................................100
SPA......................................................................................................................................................100
OSTENDE...........................................................................................................................................103
GENT. ..................................................................................................................................................105
BREITMANN IN HOLLAND............................................................................................................106
'S GRAVENHAGE THE HAGUE. ..................................................................................................106
LEYDEN. .............................................................................................................................................107
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE............................................................................108
AMSTERDAM. ...................................................................................................................................111
GERMANY.........................................................................................................................................113
BREITMANN AM RHEIN COLOGNE. .........................................................................................113
AM RHEIN. No. II...........................................................................................................................116
AM RHEIN. No. III. .........................................................................................................................118
MUNICH.............................................................................................................................................119
FRANKFORTONTHEMAIN. ......................................................................................................122
ITALY. .................................................................................................................................................123
BREITMANN IN ROME. ...................................................................................................................123
LA SCALA SANTA. ...........................................................................................................................127
BREITMANN INTERVIEWS THE POPE. ........................................................................................128
THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT
NEVER APPEARED..........................................................................................................................130
BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS....................................................................................................136
BREITMANN IN TURKEY...............................................................................................................136
COBUS HAGELSTEIN......................................................................................................................140
FRITZERL SCHNALL.......................................................................................................................141
THE GYPSY LOVER.........................................................................................................................143
DORNENLIEDER. ..............................................................................................................................144
BREITMANN'S SLEIGHRIDE. .......................................................................................................146
THE MAGIC SHOES. .........................................................................................................................148
GLOSSARY........................................................................................................................................151
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The Breitmann Ballads
Charles G. Leland
Preface To the Edition of 1889.
PREFACE
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER
HANS BREITMANN'S BARTY.
BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS.
BALLAD.
A BALLAD APOUT DE ROWDIES.
THE PICNIC
I GILI ROMANESKRO.
STEINLI VON SLANG.
TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN.
LOVE SONG
DER FREISCHUTZ
WEIN GEIST
SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE.
I. PROLOGUE.
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE.
DIE SCHONE WITTWE[9]
I. VOT DE YANKEE CHAP SUNG.
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT.
BREITMANN IN BATTLE
BREITMANN IN MARYLAND.
BREITMANN AS A BUMMER
SECOND PART.
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH.
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26]
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS.
BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN
BREITMANN IN POLITICS.
I.THE NOMINATION
2. THE COMMITTEE OF INSTRUCTION.
3. MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE."
4.HOW BREITMANN AND SMITH WERE REPORTED TO BE LOGROLLING
5.HOW THEY HELD THE MASS MEETING.
6.BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH.
THE AUTHOR ASSERTS THE VAST INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY OF GERMANS TO
AMERICANS.
SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35]
BREITMANN AS AN UHLAN.
I. THE VISION.
II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON.
III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI.
The Breitmann Ballads 1
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IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY.
V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC.
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY.
EUROPE.
BREITMANN IN PARIS.
BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE.
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT.
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM.
SPA.
OSTENDE.
GENT.
BREITMANN IN HOLLAND.
'S GRAVENHAGE THE HAGUE.
LEYDEN.
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE.
AMSTERDAM.
GERMANY.
BREITMANN AM RHEIN COLOGNE.
AM RHEIN. No. II.
AM RHEIN. No. III.
MUNICH.
FRANKFORTONTHEMAIN.
ITALY.
BREITMANN IN ROME.
LA SCALA SANTA.
BREITMANN INTERVIEWS THE POPE.
THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT NEVER
APPEARED.
BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS.
BREITMANN IN TURKEY.
COBUS HAGELSTEIN.
FRITZERL SCHNALL.
THE GYPSY LOVER.
DORNENLIEDER.
BREITMANN'S SLEIGHRIDE.
THE MAGIC SHOES.
GLOSSARY
TO THE MEMORY
OF THE LATE
NICHOLAS TRUBNER
This Work is Dedicated
by
Charles G. Leland
Ad Musan.
"Est mihi schoena etenim et praestanti corpore liebsta
Haec sola est mea Musa meoque regierit in Herza.
Huic me ergebo ipsum meaque illi abstatto geluebda,
Huic ebrensaulas aufrichto opfroque Geschenka,
Hic etiam absingo liedros et carmina scribo."
Rapsodia Andra, Leipzig, 17th Century
The Breitmann Ballads
The Breitmann Ballads 2
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Preface To the Edition of 1889.
Though twenty years have passed since the first appearance of the "Breitmann Ballads" in a collected
form, the author is deeply gratified and not less sincerely grateful to the public in knowing that Hans
still lives in many memories, that he continues to be quoted when writers wish to illustrate an exuberantly
joyous "barty" or ladies so very fashionably dressed as to recall "de maidens mit nodings on," and that no
inconsiderable number of those who are "beginning German" continue to be addressed by sportive friends in
the Breitmann dialect as a compliment to their capacity as linguists. For as a young medical student is asked
by anxious intimates if he has got as far as salts, I have heard inquiries addressed to tyros in Teutonic whether
they had mastered these songs. As I have realised all of this from newspapers and novels, even during the
past few weeks, and have learned that a new and very expensive edition of the work has just appeared in
America, I trust that I may be pardoned for a selfgratulation, which is, after all really gratitude to those who
have demanded of the English publisher another issue. My chief pleasure in this though it be mingled with
sorrow is, that it enables me to dedicate to the memory of my friend the late NICHOLAS TRUBNER the
most complete edition of the Ballads ever printed. I can think of no more appropriate tribute to his memory,
since he was not only the first publisher of the work in England, but collaborated with the author in editing it
so far as to greatly improve and extend the whole. This is more fully set forth in the Introduction to the
Glossary, which is all his own. The memory of the deep personal interest which he took in the poems, his
delight in being their publisher, his fondness for reciting them, is and ever will be to me indescribably
touching; such experiences being rare in any life. He was an immensely general and yet thorough scholar, and
I am certain that I never met with any man in my life who to such an extensive bibliographical knowledge
added so much familiarity with the contents of books. And he was familiar with nothing which did not
interest him, which is rare indeed among men who MUST know something of thousands of works in fact,
he was a wonderful and very original book in himself, which, if it had ever been written out and published,
would have never died. His was one of the instances which give the world good cause to regret that the art of
autobiography is of all others the one least taught or studied. There are few characters more interesting than
those in which the practical man of business is combined with the scholar, because of the contrasts, or varied
play of light and shadow, in them, and this was, absolutely to perfection, that of Mr. Trubner. And if I have
reedited this work, it was that I might have an opportunity of recording it.
There are others to whom I owe sincere gratitude for interest displayed in this work when it was young. The
first of these was the late CHARLES ASTOR BRISTED of New York. With the exception of the "Barty,"
most of the poems in the first edition were written merely to fill up letters to him, and as I kept no copy of
them, they would have been forgotten, had he not preserved and printed them after a time in a sporting paper.
Nor would they even after this have appeared (though Mr. Bristed once tried to surprise me with a privately
printed collection of them, which attempt failed) had not Mr. RINGWALT, my collaborator on the
PHILADELPHIA PRESS, and also a printer, had such faith in the work as to have it "set up" in his office,
offering to try an edition for me. This was transferred to PETERSON BROTHERS, in whose hands the sale
became at once very great; and I should be truly ungrateful if I omitted to mention among the many writers
who were very kind in reviews, Mr. GEORGE A. SALA, who was chiefly influential in introducing Hans
Breitmann to the English public, and who has ever been his warmest friend. Another friend who encouraged
and aided me by criticism was the late OCTAVE DELEPIERRE, a man of immense erudition, especially in
archaeology, curiosa and facetiae. I trust that I may be pardoned for here mentioning that he often spoke of
Breitmann's "Interview with the Pope" as his favorite Macaronic poem, which, as he had published two
volumes of Macaronea, was praise indeed. His theory was, that as Macaronics were the ultraextravagance of
poetry, he who wrote most recklessly in them did best; in fact, that they should excel in firstrate BADNESS;
and from this point of view it is possible that Breitmann's Latin lyric is not devoid of merit, since assuredly
nobody ever wrote a worse. The late LORD LYTTON, or "Bulwer," was also kind enough to take an interest
in these Ballads, which was to me as gratifying as it was amazing. It was one of the great surprises of my life.
I have a long letter from him, addressed to me on the appearance of the collected edition, in 1870. In it he
spoke with warmest compliment of the poem of "Leyden," and the first verses of "Breitmann in Belgium."
The Breitmann Ballads
Preface To the Edition of 1889. 3
Page No 7
In conclusion, I acknowledge the courtesy of Messers. DALZIELL BROTHERS for allowing me to republish
here four poems which had appeared in the "Brand New Ballads" published by them in 1885. But to mention
all of the people of whom I have grateful memories in connection with the work, who have become
acquainted with me through it, or written to me, or said pleasant words, would be impossible. I am happy to
think it would embrace many of the Men of the Times during the last twenty years and unfortunately too
many who are now departed. And trusting that the reader will take in good part all that I have said, I remain,
his true friend (for truly there is no friend dearer than a devoted reader),
CHARLES G. LELAND
PREFACE
When HANS BREITMANN'S PARTY, WITH OTHER BALLADS, appeared, the only claim made on its
behalf was, that it constituted the first book ever written in English as imperfectly spoken by Germans. The
author consequently held himself bound to give his broken English a truthful form. So far as observation and
care, aided by the suggestions of welleducated German friends, could enable him to do this, it was done. But
the more extensive were his observations, the more did the fact force itself upon his mind, that there is
actually no welldefined method or standard of "GermanEnglish," since not only do no two men speak it
alike, but no one individual is invariably consistent in his errors or accuracies. Every reader who knows any
foreign language imperfectly is aware that HE SPEAKS IT BETTER AT ONE TIME THAN ANOTHER,
and it would consequently have been a grave error to reduce the broken and irregular jargon of the book to a
fixed and regular language, or to require that the author should invariably write exactly the same
mispronunciations with strict consistency on all occasions.
The opinion entirely foreign to any intention of the author that Hans Breitmann is an embodied satire
on everything German, has found very few supporters, and it is with the greatest gratification that he has
learned that educated and intelligent Germans regard Hans as a jocose burlesque of a type which is every day
becoming rarer. And if Teutonic philosophy and sentiment, beer, music, and romance, have been made the
medium for what many reviewers have kindly declared to be laughtermoving, let the reader be assured that
not a single word was meant in a bitter or unkindly spirit. It is true that there is always a standpoint from
which any effort may be misjudged, but this standpoint certainly did not occur to the writer when he wrote,
with anything but misgiving, of his "hearty, hardfighting, goodnatured old exstudent," who, in the
political ballads and others, appears to no moral disadvantage by the side of his associates.
Breitmann in several ballads is indeed a very literal copy or combination of characteristics of men who really
exist or existed, and who had in their lives embraced as many extremes of thought as the Captain. America
abounds with Germans, who, having received in their youth a "classical education," have passed through
varied adventures, and often present the most startling paradoxes of thought and personal appearance. I have
seen bearing a keg a porter who could speak Latin fluently. I have been in a beershop kept by a man who
was distinguished in the Frankfurt Parliament. I have found a graduate of the University of Munich in a negro
minstrel troupe. And while mentioning these as proof that Breitmann, as I have depicted him, is not a
contradictory character, I cannot refrain from a word of praise as to the energy and patience with which the
German "under a cloud" in America bears his reverses, and works cheerfully and uncomplainingly, until, by
sheer perseverance, he, in most cases, conquers fortune. In this respect the Germans, as a race, and I might
almost say as individuals, are superior to any others on the American continent. And if I have jested with the
German new philosophy, it is with the more seriousness that I here acknowledge the deepest respect for that
true practical philosophy of life that wellbalanced mixture of stoicism and epicurism which enables
Germans to endure and to ENJOY under circumstances when other men would probably despair.
The Breitmann Ballads
PREFACE 4
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Breitmann is one of the battered types of the men of '48 a person whose education more than his heart has
in every way led him to entire scepticism or indifference and one whose Lutheranism does not go beyond
"Wein, Weib, und Gesang." Beneath his unlimited faith in pleasure lie natural shrewdness, an excellent early
education, and certain principles of honesty and good fellowship, which are all the more clearly defined from
his moral looseness in details which are identified in the AngloSaxon mind with total depravity. In such a
man, the appreciation of the beautiful in nature may be keen, but it will continually vanish before humour or
mere fun; while having no deep root in life or interests in common with the settled AngloSaxon citizen, he
cannot fail to appear at times to the latter as a near relation to Mephistopheles. But his "mockery" is as
accidental and naif as that of Jewish Young Germany is keen and deliberate; and the former differs from the
latter as the drollery of Abraham a Santa Clara differs from the brilliant satire of Heine.
The reader should be fairly warned that these poems abound in words, phrases, suggestions, and even
couplets, borrowed to such an extent from old ballads and other sources, as to make acknowledgement in
many cases seem affectation. Where this has appeared to be worth the while, it has been done. The lyrics
were written for a laugh without anticipating publication, so far as a number of the principal ones in the
first volume were concerned, and certainly without the least idea that they would be extensively and closely
criticised by eminent and able reviewers. Before the compilation the "Barty" had almost passed from the
writer's memory, several other songs of the same character by him were quite forgotten, while a number had
formed portions of letters to friends, by one of whom a few were published in a newspaper. When finally
urged by many who were pleased with "Breitmann" to issue these humble lyrics in book form, it was with
some difficulty that the first volume was brought together.
The excuse for the foregoing observations is the unexpected success of a book which is of itself of so
eccentric a character as to require some explanation. For its reception from the public, and the kindness and
consideration with which it has been treated by the press, the author can never be sufficiently grateful.
CHARLES G. LELAND
London, 1871.
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER
"HANS BREITMANN GIFE A BARTY" the first of the poems here submitted to the English public
appeared originally in 1857, in Graham's Magazine, in Philadelphia, and soon became widely known. Few
American poems, indeed, have been held in better or more constant remembrance than the ballad of "Hans
Breitmann's Barty;" for the words just quoted have actually passed into a proverbial expression. The other
ballads of the present collection, likewise published in several newspapers, were first collected in 1869 by
Mr. Leland, the translator of Heine's "Pictures of Travel" and "Book of Songs," and author of Meister Karl's
Sketch Book," Philadelphia, 1856 and "Sunshine in Thought," New York, 1863. They are much of the same
character as "The Barty" most of them celebrating the martial career of "Hans Breitmann," whose prototype
was a German, serving during the war in the 15th Pennsylvanian cavalry, and who we have it on good
authority was a man of desperate courage whenever a cent could be made, and one who never fought unless
something could be made. The "rebs" "gobbled" him one day; but he reappeared in three weeks overloaded
with money and valuables. One of the American critics remarks: "Throughout all the ballads it is the same
figure presented an honest 'Deutscher,' drunk with the New World as with new wine, and rioting in the
expression of purely Deutsch nature and halfDeutsch ideas through a strange speech."
The poems are written in the dull broken English (not to be confounded with the Pennsylvanian
German) spoken by millions of mostly uneducated Germans in America, immigrants to a great extent
from southern Germany. Their English has not yet become a distinct dialect; and it would even be difficult to
fix at present the varieties in which it occurs. One of its prominent peculiarities, however, is easily perceived:
it consists in the constant confounding of the soft and hard consonants; and the reader must well bear it in
The Breitmann Ballads
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER 5
Page No 9
mind when translating the language that meets his eye into one to become intelligible to his ear. Thus to the
German of our poet, kiss becomes giss; company gompany; care gare; count gount; corner gorner; till
dill; terrible derrible; time dime; mountain moundain; thing ding; through droo; the de;
themselves demselves; other oder; party barty; place blace; pig big; priest breest; piano biano;
plaster blaster; fine vine; fighting vighting; fellow veller; or, vice versa, he sounds got cot; green
creen; great crate; gold dollars cold tollars; dam tam; dreadful treadful; drunk troonk; brown
prown; blood ploot; bridge pridge; barrel parrel; boot poot; begging peggin'; blackguard
plackguart; rebel repel; never nefer; river rifer; very fery; give gife; victory fictory; evening
efening; revive refife; jump shoomp; join choin; joy choy; just shoost; joke choke; jingling
shingling;, or, through a kindred change, both bofe; youth youf; but mouth mout'; earth eart'; south
sout'; waiting vaiten;' was vas; widow vidow; woman voman; work vork; one von; we ve, And
hence, by way of a compound mixture, we get from him drafel for travel, derriple for terrible, a dapleleck
for a tableleg, bepples for pebbles, tisasder for disaster, schimnastig dricks for gymnastic tricks, letbencil
for leadpencil, The peculiarity of Germans pronouncing in their mother tongue s like sh when it is followed
by a t or p, and of Germans in southern Germany often also final s like sh, naturally produced in their
American jargon such results as shplit, shtop, shtraight, shtar, shtupendous, shpree, shpirit, c ish(is), ash(as),
and, by analogy led to shveet(sweet), schwig(swig), We need not notice, however, more than these freaks of
the GermanAmericanEnglish of the present poems, as little as we need advert to simple vulgarisms also
met with in England, such as the omission of the final g in words terminating in ing (blayin' playing;
shpinnen' spinning; ridin', sailin', roonin', We must, of course, assume that the reader of this little volume is
well acquainted both with English and German.
The reader will perceive that the writer has taken another flight in "Hans Breitmann's Christmas," and
many of the later ballads, from what he did in those preceding; and exception might be taken to his choice of
subjects, and treatment of them, if the language employed by him were a fixed dialect that is, a language
arrested at a certain stage of its progress; for in that case he would have had to subordinate his pictures to the
narrow sphere of the realistic incidents of a given locality. But the imperfect English utterances of the
German, newly arrived in America, coloured more or less by the peculiarities of his native idiom, do not
make, and never will make a dialect, for the simple reason that, in proportion to his intelligence, his
opportunities, and the length of time spent by him among his new Englishspeaking countrymen, he will
sooner or later rid himself of the crudenesses of his speech, thus preventing it from becoming fixed. Many of
the Germans who have emigrated and are still emigrating to America belong to the welleducated classes,
and some possess a very high culture. Our poet has therefore presented his typical German, with perfect
propriety, in a variety of situations which would be imperceptible within which the the dialect necessarily
moves, and has endowed him with character, even where the local colour is wanting.
In "Breitmann in Politics," we are on purely American ground.
In it the Germans convince themselves that, as their hero can no longer plunder the rebels, he ought to
plunder the nation, and they resolve on getting him elected to the State Legislature. They accordingly form a
committee, and formulate for their candidate six "moral ideas" as his platform. These they show to their
Yankee helper, Hiram Twine, who, having changed his politics fifteen times, and managed several elections,
knows how matters should be handled. He says the moral ideas are very fine, but not worth a "dern;" and
instead of them proclaims the true cry, that Breitmann is sound upon the goose, about which he tells a story.
Then it is reported that the German cannot win, and that, as he is a soldier, he has been sent into the political
field only to lead the forlorn hope and get beaten. In answer to this, Twine starts the report that Smith has
sold the fight to Breitmann, a notion which the Americans take to at once
"For dey mostly dinked id de naturalest ding as efer couldt pefall For to sheat von's own gonstituents is de
pest mofe in de came, Und dey nefer sooposed a Dootchman hafe de sense to do de same."
The Breitmann Ballads
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER 6
Page No 10
Accordingly, Breitmann calls a meeting of Smith's supporters, tells them that he hopes to get a good place for
his friend Smith, though he cannot approve of Smith's teetotal principles, because he, Breitmann, is a
republican, and the meaning of that word is plain: "... If any enlightened man vill seeken in his Bibel, he
will find dat a publican is a barty ash sells lager; und de ding is very blain, dat a republican ish von who
sells id 'gain und 'gain." Moreover, Smith believes in God, and goes to church, what liberal German can
stand this? while Breitmann, being a publican, must be a sinner. As to parties, the principles of both are the
same plunder and "any man who gifes me his fote, votefer his boledics pe, shall alfays pe regardet
ash bolidigal friendt py me."
This brings the house down. And when Breitmann announces that he sells the best beer in the city, and stands
drinks gratis to his "bolidigal friendts," and orders in twelve barrels of lager for the meeting, he is
unanimously voted "a brickbat, and no sardine."
After this brilliant success, the author is obliged to pause, in order to proclaim the intellectual
superiority of Germans to the whole world. He gets tremendously befogged in the process, but that is no
matter
"Ash der Hegel say of his system,' Dat only von mans knew
Vot der tyfel id meant; and he couldn't tell,' und der Jean
Paul Richter, too,
Who saidt, 'Gott knows, I meant somedings vhen foorst dis
buch I writ,
Boot Gott only weiss vot das buch means now, for I hafe
forgotten it!'"
But, taking the point as proved, our German still allows that the Yankees have some sharppointed sense,
which he illustrates by narrating how Hiram Twine turned a village of Smithvoters into the Breitmann
camp. The village is German and Democrat. Smith has forgotten his meeting, and Twine, who is very like
Smith, and rides into the village to watch the meeting, is taken by the Germans for Smith. On this, Twine
resolves to personate Smith, and give his supporters a dose of him. Accordingly, on being asked to drink, he
tells the Germans that none but hogs would drink their stinking beer, and that German wine was only made
for German swine. Then he goes to the meeting, and, having wounded their feelings in the tenderest point,
the love of beer, attacks the next tenderest, their love for their language, by declaring that he will vote
for preventing the speaking of it all through the States; and winds up by exhorting them to stop guzzling beer
and smoking pipes, and set to work to unGermanise themselves as soon as possible. On this "dere coomed a
shindy," with cries of "Shoot him with a bowieknife," and "Tar and feather him." A revolverball cuts the
chandeliercord; all is dark; and amidst the row, Twine escapes and gallops off, with some pistolballs after
him. But the village votes for Breitmann, and be "licks der Schmit."
The ballad, "Breitmann's Going to Church," is based on a real occurrence. A certain colonel, with his
men, did really, during the war, go to a church in or near Nashville, and, as the saying is, "kicked up the
devil, and broke things," to such an extent, that a serious reprimand from the colonel's superior officer was
the result. The fact is guaranteed by Mr. Leland, who heard the offender complain of the "cruel and heartless
stretch of military authority." As regards the firing into the guerilla ballroom, it took place near
Murfreesboro', on the night of Feb. 10 or 11, 1865; and on the next day, Mr. Leland was at a house where one
of the wounded lay. On the same night a Federal picket was shot dead near Lavergne; and the next night a
detachment of cavalry was sent off from General Van Cleve's quarters, the officer in command coming in
while the author was talking with the general, for final orders. They rode twenty miles that night, attacked a
body of guerillas, captured a number, and brought back prisoners early next day. The same day Mr. Leland,
with a small cavalry escort, and a few friends, went out into the country, during which ride one or two curious
incidents occurred, illustrating the extraordinary fidelity of the blacks to Federal soldiers.
The Breitmann Ballads
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER 7
Page No 11
The explanation of the poem entitled, "The First Edition of Breitmann," is as follows: It was not
long after the war that a friend of the writer's to whom "the Breitmann Ballads" had been sent in MSS., and
who had frequently urged the former to have them published, resolved to secure, at least, a small private
edition, though at his own expense. Unfortunately the printers quarrelled about the MSS., and, as the writer
understood, the entire concern broke up in a row in consequence. And, in fact, when we reflect on the amount
of fierce attack and recrimination we reflect this unpretending and peaceful little volume elicited after the
appearance of the fifth English edition, and the injury which it sustained from garbled and falsified editions,
in not less than three unauthorised reprints, it would really seem as if this first edition, which "died a
borning," had been typical of the stormy path to which the work was predestined.
"I Gili Romaneskro," a gipsy ballad, was written both in the original and translation that is to say,
in the German gipsy and German English dialects to cast a new light on the manysided Bohemianism of
Herr Breitmann.
The readers of more than one English newspaper will recall that the idea of representing Breitmann as
an Uhlan, scouting over France, and frequently laying houses and even cities under heavy contribution, has
occurred to very many of "Our Own." A spirited correspondent of the Telegraph, and others of literary fame,
have familiarly referred to the Uhlan as Breitmann, indicating that the GermanAmerican freelance has
grown into a type; and more than one newspaper, anticipating this volume, has published AngloGerman
poems referring to Hans Breitmann and the PrussianFrench war. In several pamphlets written in
AngloGerman rhymes, which appeared in London in 1871, Breitmann was made the representative type of
the war by both the friends and opponents of Prussia, while during February of the same year Hans figured at
the same time, and on the same evenings for several weeks, on the stages of three London theatres. So many
imitations of these poems were published, and so extensively and familiarly was Mr. Leland's hero spoken of
as the exponent of the German cause, that it seemed to a writer at the time as if he had become "as regards
Germany what John Bull and Brother Jonathan have long been to England and America." In connection with
this remark, the following extract from a letter of the Special Correspondent of the London Daily Telegraph
of August 29, 1870, may not be without interest:
"The Prussian Uhlan of 1870 seems destined to fill in French legendary chronicle the place which,
during the invasions of 1814 15, was occupied by the Cossack. He is a great traveller. Nancy, BarleDuc,
Commercy, Rheims, Chalons, St. Dizier, Chaumont, have all heard of him. The Uhlan makes himself quite at
home, and drops in, entirely in a friendly way, on mayors and corporations, asking not only himself to dinner,
but an indefinite number of additional Uhlans, who, he says, may be expected hourly. The Uhlan wears a blue
uniform turned up with yellow, and to the end of his lance is affixed a streamer intimately resembling a very
dirty white pockethandkerchief. Sometimes he hunts in couples, sometimes he goes in threes, and
sometimes in fives. When he lights upon a village, he holds it to ransom; when he comes upon a city, he
captures it, making it literally the prisoner of his bow and his spear. A writer in Blackwood's Magazine once
drove the people of Lancashire to madness by declaring that, in the Rebellion of 1745, Manchester 'was taken
by a Scots sergeant and a wench;' but it is a notorious fact that Nancy submitted without a murmur to five
Uhlans, and that BarleDuc was occupied by two. When the Uhlan arrives in a conquered city, he visits the
mayor, and makes his usual inordinate demands for meat, drink, and cigars. If his demands are acceded to, he
accepts everything with a grin. If he is refused, he remarks, likewise with a grin, that he will come again
tomorrow with three thousand light horsemen, and he gallops away; but in many cases he does not return.
The secret of the fellow's success lies mainly in his unblushing impudence, his easy mendacity, and that
intimate knowledge of every highway and byway of the country which, thanks to the military organisation of
the Prussian army, he has acquired in the regimental school. He gives himself out to be the precursor of an
imminently advancing army, when, after all, he is only a boldly adventurous freelance, who has ridden
thirty miles across country on the chance of picking up something in the way of information or victuals. Only
one more touch is needed to complete the portrait of the Uhlan. His veritable name would seem to be Hans
Breitmann, and his vocation that of a 'bummer;' and Breitmann, we learn from the preface to Mr. Leland's
The Breitmann Ballads
INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER 8
Page No 12
wonderful ballad, had a prototype in a regiment of Pennsylvanian cavalry by the name of Jost, whose
proficiency in 'bumming,' otherwise 'looting,' in swearing, fighting, and drinking lager beer, raised him to a
pitch of glory on the Federal side which excited at once the envy and the admiration of the boldest
bushwhackers and the gauntest guerillas in the Confederate host."
The present edition embraces all the Breitmann poems which have as yet appeared; and the publisher
trusts that in their collected form they will be found much more attractive than in scattered volumes. Many
new lyrics, illustrating the hero's travels in Europe, have been added, and these, it is believed, are not inferior
to their predecessors.
N. TRUBNER.
HANS BREITMANN'S BARTY.
HANS BREITMANN gife a barty;
Dey had bianoblayin',
I felled in lofe mit a Merican frau,
Her name vas Madilda Yane.
She hat haar as prown ash a pretzel,
Her eyes vas himmelplue,
Und vhen dey looket indo mine,
Dey shplit mine heart in dwo.
Hans Breitmann gife a barty,
I vent dere you'll pe pound;
I valtzet mit Matilda Yane,
Und vent shpinnen' round und round.
De pootiest Fraulein in de house,
She vayed 'pout dwo hoondred pound,
Und efery dime she gife a shoomp
She make de vindows sound.
Hans Breitmann gife a barty,
I dells you it cost him dear;
Dey rolled in more ash sefen kecks
Of foostrate lager beer.
Und vhenefer dey knocks de shpicket in
De deutschers gifes a cheer;
I dinks dot so vine a barty
Nefer coom to a het dis year.
Hans Breitmann gife a barty;
Dere all vas Souse and Brouse,
Vhen de sooper comed in, de gompany
Did make demselfs to house;
Dey ate das Brot and Gensy broost,
De Bratwurst and Braten vine,
Und vash der Abendessen down
Mit four parrels of Neckarwein.
The Breitmann Ballads
HANS BREITMANN'S BARTY. 9
Page No 13
Hans Breitmann gife a barty;
Ve all cot troonk ash bigs.
I poot mine mout' to a parrel of beer,
Und emptied it oop mit a schwigs;
Und den I gissed Madilda Yane,
Und she shlog me on de kop,
Und de gompany vighted mit daplelecks
Dill de coonshtable made oos shtop.
Hans Breitmann gife a barty
Vhere ish dot barty now?
Vhere ish de lofely golden cloud
Dot float on de moundain's prow?
Vhere ish de himmelstrahlende stern
De shtar of de shpirit's light?
All goned afay mit de lager beer
Afay in de ewigkeit!
BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS.
HANS BREITMANN shoined de Turners,
Novemper in de fall,
Und dey gifed a boostin' bender
All in de Turner Hall.
Dere coomed de whole Gesangverein
Mit der Liederlich Aepfel Chor,[1]
Und dey blowed on de drooms and stroomed on de fifes
Till dey couldn't refife no more.
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners,
Dey all set oop some shouts,
Dey took'd him into deir Turner Hall,
Und poots him a course of shprouts.
Dey poots him on de barellhell pars
Und shtands him oop on his head,
Und dey poomps de beer mit an enchine hose
In his mout' dill he's 'pout half tead!
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners;
Dey make shimnastig dricks;
He stoot on de middle of de floor,
Und put oop a fifdysix.
Und den he drows it to de roof,
Und schwig off a treadful trink:
De veight coom toomple back on his headt,
Und py shinks! he didn't vink!
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS. 10
Page No 14
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners:
Mein Gott! how dey drinked und shwore;
Dere vas Schwabians und Tyrolers,
Und Bavarians by de score.
Some vellers coomed from de Rheinland,
Und FrankfortondeMain,
Boot dere vas only von Sharman dere,
Und he vas a Holstein Dane.
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners,
Mit a Limpurg' cheese he coom;
Vhen he open de box it schmell so loudt
It knock de musik doomb.
Vhen de Deutschers kit de flavour,
It coorl de haar on deir head;
Boot dere vas dwo Amerigans dere;
Und, py tam! it kilt dem dead!
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners;
De ladies coomed in to see;
Dey poot dem in de blace for de gals,
All in der gallerie.
Dey ashk: "Vhere ish der Breitmann?"
Und dey dremple mit awe and fear
Vhen dey see him schwingen' py de toes,
A trinken' lager beer.
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners:
I dells you vot py tam!
Dey sings de great Urbummellied:[2]
De holy Sharman psalm.
Und vhen de kits to de gorus
You ought to hear dem dramp!
It scared der Teufel down below
To hear de Dootchmen stamp.
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners:
By Donner! it vas grand,
Vhen de whole of dem goes valkin
Und dancin' on deir hand,
Mit deir veet all vavin' in de air,
Gottstausend! vot a dricks!
Dill der Breitmann fall und dey all go down
Shoost like a row of bricks.
Hans Breitmann shoined de Turners,
Dey lay dere in a heap,
And slept dill de early sonnen shine
Come in at de vindow creep;
And de preeze it vake dem from deir dream,
And dey go to kit deir feed:
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS. 11
Page No 15
Here hat dis song an ende
Das ist DES BREITMANNSLEID.
BALLAD.
BY HANS BREITMANN.
Der noble Ritter Hugo
Von Schwillensaufenstein,
Rode out mit shper and helmet,
Und he coom to de panks of de Rhine.
Und oop dere rose a meermaid,
Vot hadn't got nodings on,
Und she say, "Oh, Ritter Hugo,
Vhere you goes mit yourself alone?"
And he says, "I rides in de creenwood,
Mit helmet und mit shpeer,
Til I coomes into em Gasthaus,
Und dere I trinks some beer."
Und den outshpoke de maiden
Vot hadn't got nodings on:
"I don't dink mooch of beoplesh
Dat goes mit demselfs alone.
"You'd petter coom down in de wasser,
Vhere dere's heaps of dings to see,
Und hafe a shplendid tinner
Und drafel along mit me.
"Dere you sees de fisch a schwimmin',
Und you catches dem efery von:"
So sang dis wasser maiden
Vot hadn't got nodings on.
"Dere ish drunks all full mit money
In ships dat vent down of old;
Und you helpsh yourself, by dunder!
To shimmerin' crowns of gold.
"Shoost look at dese shpoons und vatches!
Shoost see dese diamant rings!
Coom down and fill your bockets,
Und I'll giss you like efery dings.
The Breitmann Ballads
BALLAD. 12
Page No 16
"Vot you vantsh mit your schnapps und lager?
Coom down into der Rhine!
Der ish pottles der Kaiser Charlemagne
Vonce filled mit goldred wine!"
Dat fetched him he shtood all shpell pound;
She pooled his coattails down,
She drawed him oonder der wasser,
De maiden mit nodings on.
A BALLAD APOUT DE ROWDIES.
De moon shines ofer de cloudlens,
Und de cloudts plow ofer de sea,
Und I vent to Coney Island,
Und I took mein Schatz mit me.
Mein Schatz, Katrina Bauer,
I gife her mein heart und vortdt;
Boot ve tidn't know vot beoples
De Dampfsschiff hafe cot on poard.
De preeze plowed cool und bleasant,
We looket at de town
Mit sonnlight on de shdeebles,
Und wetter fanes doornin' round.
Ve sat on de deck in a gorner
Und dropled nopody dere,
Vhen all aroundt oos de rowdies
Peginned to plackguard und schvear.
A voman mit a papy
Vos sittin' in de blace;
Von tooket a chew tobacco
Und trowed it indo her vace.
De voman got coonvulshons,
De papy pegin to gry;
Und de rowdies shkreemed out a laffin,
Und saidt dat de fun was "high."
Pimepy ve become some hoonger,
Katrina Bauer und I,
I openet de lit of mine pasket,
Und pringed out a cherry bie.
A cherry kooken mit pretzels,
"How goot!" Katrina said,
Vhen a rowdy snatched it from her,
Und preaked it ofer mine het.
The Breitmann Ballads
A BALLAD APOUT DE ROWDIES. 13
Page No 17
I dells him he pe a plackguart,
I gifed him a biece my mind,
I vouldt saidt it pefore a tousand,
Mit der teufel himself pehind.
Den he knocks me down mit a sloongshot,
Und peats me plack and plue;
Und de plackguards kick me,
Dill I vainted, und dat ish drue.
De rich American beoples
Don't know how de rowdies shtrike
Der poor hardtworkin' Sharman,
He knows it more ash he like.
If de Deutsche speakers und bapers
Are somedimes too hard on dis land,
Shoost dink how de Deutsch kit driven
Along by de rowdy's hand!
THE PICNIC
DE picknock oud at Spraker's Wood:
It melt de soul und fire de plood.
Id sofly slid from cakes und cream;
Boot busted oop on brandy shdeam.
Mit stims of tender graceful ring,
De gals begoon a song to sing;
A bland mildt lied of olden dime
Deutsch vas die doon, und Deutsch de rhyme.
Wi's uff der Stross' wenn's finschter ischt,
Und niemond in der Goss' mehr ischt,
Nur Schone Madel wolle mer fonga,
Wie es gebil'te Leut' verlonga.
At de picknock oud in Spraker's Wood,
De Bier was softde gals were good:
Oondil von feller, vild and rasch,
Called out for a Yankee brandysmash!
A crow vot vas valkin on de vall,
Fell dead ven he hear dis Dootchmann call;
For he knew dat droples coom, py shinks!
Ven de Dootch go in for Yankee drinks.
De Dootch got ravin droonk ash sin,
The Breitmann Ballads
THE PICNIC 14
Page No 18
Dey smash de windows out und in;
Dey bust und bang de barroom ein,
Und call for a bucket of branntewein.
Avay, avay, demselfs dey floong,
Und a wild infernal lied dey sung:
'Tvas, "Tam de wein, and cuss de bier!
Ve tont care nix for de demprance here!
"O keep a pringin juleps in,
Und baldface corn dat burn like sin;
Mit apple tods und oldt shtone fence,
Ve'll all get corned ere ve go hence!"
Dey dash deir glasses on de cround,
Und tanz dill'tvas all to brickduss ground,
Ven dey hear von man had a tendollar note,
De crowd go dead for dat rich man's troat.
A demperance chap vot coomed dere in,
Vent squanderin out mit his shell burst in;
"It's walk your chalks, you loost your chance,
Dis vot de call der Dootchmans' dance."
Boot ven de law, mit his myrmidon,
Vas hear of dese Dootchmen's carryinson,
Dey sent bolicemen shtern und good,
To pull dose Dootch in Spraker's Wood.
De Dootch vas all gone roarin mad,
Und trinked mit Spraker all dey had;
Dey shpend 'nuf money to last deir life,
And each vas tantzin mit anoder man's wife.
Dey all cot poonish difers vays,
Some vent to jug for dirty tays;
Und de von dat kilt de demperance man
Vas kit from de Alderman repriman.
Und dus it ran:"A warnin dake,
For you mighdt hafe mate soom pig mishdake;
Now how vouldt you hafe feeled, py shing!
If dat man hat peen in de whiskey ring?
"Since you votes mine dicket, of course you know,
I'm pound to led you shlide und go.
Boot nefer on whiskey trink your fill,
For you Dootchmen don't know who to kill."
Now Deutschers allon dis warning dink,
Und don't get troonk on Yankee trink,
The Breitmann Ballads
THE PICNIC 15
Page No 19
For neider you, or anoder man,
Can pe hocks like de New York rowdies can.
So trink goot bier, mit musik plest,
For if you tried your level best,
You can't be plackguartstaint in de plood:
Dus endet de shdory of Spraker's Wood.
I GILI ROMANESKRO.
A GIPSY BALLAD.
Vhen der Herr Breitmann vas a yungling, he vas go bummin aroundt
goot deal in de worldt, vestigatin human natur, roulant de vergne
en vergne, ash de Fraentsch boet says: "goin from town to town;"
seein beobles in gemixed sociedy, und learnin dose languages vitch
ornamendt a drue moskopolite, or von whose kopf ish bemosst mit
experience. Mong oder tongues, ash it would appeared, he shpoke
fluendly, Red Welsh, Black Dootch, KauderWaelsch, Gaunersprache,
und Shipsy; und dis latter languashe he pring so wide dat he write
a pook of pallads in it,von of vitch pallads I hafe intuce him mit
moosh droples to telifer ofer to de worldt. De inclined reader
vill, mit crate heavyhood blace pefore himself de fexation und
lapor I hafe hat in der Breitmann his absents, to ged dese Shipsy
verses broperly gorrected; as de only shentleman in town who vas
culpable of so doin, ish peen gonfined in de townbrison, pout some
droples he hat for shdealin some hens; und pefore I couldt consoolt
mit him, he vas rooned afay. Denn I fond an oldt vomans Shipsy,
who vas do nodings boot peg, und so wider mit pout five or four
oders more. Derfore, de errordoms moost pe excused py de enlightened
pooplic, who are fomiliar mit dis peautiful languashe, vitch is now so
shenerally fashionabel in laterary und shpordin circles.
F. SCHWACKENHAMMER.
I GILI ROMANESKRO.
Schunava, ke baschno del a godla,
Schunava Paschomaskro.
Te del miro Dewel tumen
Dschavena Bachtallo.[3]
Schunava opre to ruka
Chiriklo ke gillela:
Kamovela but dives,
The Breitmann Ballads
I GILI ROMANESKRO. 16
Page No 20
Eh'me pale kamaveva.
Apo je wa'wer divesseste
Schunava pro gilaviben,
M'akana me avava,
Pro marzos, pro kuriben.
So korava kuribente,
So korava apre drom;
Me kanav miri romni,
So kamela la lakero rom.
DRANSLATION.
I hear de gock a growin!
I hear de musikant!
Gott gife dee a happy shourney
Vhen you go to a distand landt.
I hears oopon de pranches
A pird mit merry shdrain,
Goot many tays moost fanish
Ere I coom to dis blace again.
Oopon some oder taytimes
I'll hear dat song from dee;
Boot now I goes ash soldier
To war, o'er de rollin sea.
Und vot I shdeals in pattle,
Und vot on de road I shdeal,
I'll pring all to my true lofe
Who lofes her lofer so well.
STEINLI VON SLANG.
I.
DER watchman look out from his tower
Ash de Abendgold glimmer grew dim,
Und saw on de road troo de Gauer
Ten shpearmen coom ridin to him:
Und he schvear: "May I lose my next bitter,
Und denn mit der Teufel go hang!
If id isn't dat pully young Ritter,
De helldrivin Steinli von Slang.
The Breitmann Ballads
STEINLI VON SLANG. 17
Page No 21
"De vorldt nefer had any such man,
He vights like a sturm in its wrath:
You may call me a recular Dutchman,
If he arn't like Goliath of Gath.
He ish big ash de shiant O'Brady,
More ash sefen feet high on a string,
Boot he can't vin de hearts of my lady,
De lofely Plectruda von Sling."
De lady make welcome her gast in,
Ash he shtep to de dop of de shtair,
She look like an angel got lost in
A forest of audumnprown hair.
Und a bowermaiden said ash she tarried:
"I wish I may bust mit a bang!
If id isn't a shame she ain't married
To der herreliche Steinli von Slang!"
He pows to de cround fore de lady,
Vhile his vace ish ash pale ash de tead;
Und she vhispers oonto him a rede
Ash mit arrow point accents, she said:
"You hafe long dimes peen dryin to win me,
You hafe vight, and mine braises you sing,
Boot I'm 'fraid dat de notion aint in me,
De Lady Plectruda von Sling.
"Boot brafehood teserves a reward, sir;
Dough you've hardly a chost of a shanse.
Sankt Werolf! medinks id ish hard, sir,
I should allaweil lead you dis dance."
Like a bees vhen it it booz troo de clofer,
Dese murmurin accents she flang,
Vhile singin, a stingin her lofer,
Der woemoody Ritter von Slang.
"Boot if von ding you do, I'll knock under,
Our droples moost endin damit
Und if you pull troo it, by donder!
I'll own myself euchred, und bit.
I schvear py de holy Sanct Chlody!
Py mine honorund avery ding!
You may hafe mesoul, puttons und pody,
Mit de whole of Plectruda von Sling."
"Und dish ish de test of your power:
Vhile ve shtand ourselfs round in a row,
You moost roll from de dop of dis tower,
Down shdairs to de valley pelow.
Id ish rough and shteep ash my virtue:"
(Mit schwanenshweet accents she sang:)
The Breitmann Ballads
STEINLI VON SLANG. 18
Page No 22
"Tont try if you dinks id vill hurt you,
Mine goot liddle Ritter von Slang."
An Moormoor arosed mong de beoples;
In fain tid she doorn in her shkorn,
Der vatchman on dop of de shdeeples
Plowed a sorryfool doon on his horn.
Ash dey look down de dousandfoot treppe,
Dey schveared dey vouldt pass on de ding,
Und not roll down de firstest tam steppe
For a hoondred like Fraulein von Sling.
II.
'Twas audumn. De dry leafs vere bustlin
Und visperin deir elfin wild talk,
Vhen shlow, mit his veet in dem rustlin,
Herr Steinli coomed out for a walk.
Wild dooks vly afar in de gloamin,
He hear a vaint gry vrom de gang;
Und vished he vere off mit dem roamin:
De heartwounded Ritter Von Slang.
Und ash he vent musin und shbeakin,
He se, shoost ahead in his vay,
In sinkular manner a streakin,
A strange liddle bein, in cray,
Who toorned on him quick mit a holler,
Und cuttin a dwo bigeon ving,
Cried, "Say, can you change me a thaler,
Oh, guest of de Lady von Sling?"
De knight vas a gootnadured veller,
(De peggars all knowed him at sight,)
So he forked out each groschen und heller,
Dill he fix de finances aright.
Boot shoost ash de liddle man vent, he,
(Der Ritter,) ashtonished cried "Dang!"
For id vasn't von thaler boot tventy,
He'd passed on der Ritter von Slang.
O reater! Soopose soosh a vlight in
De vingers of me, or of you,
How we'd toorned on our heels, und gon kitin
Dill no von vos left to pursue!
Good Lort! how we'd froze to de ready!
Boot mit him 'dvas a different ding;
For he vent on de high, moral steady,
Dis lofer of Fraulein von Sling.
Und dough no von vill gife any gredit
The Breitmann Ballads
STEINLI VON SLANG. 19
Page No 23
To dis part of mine dale, shdill id's drue,
He drafelled ash if he vould dead it,
Dis liddle oldt man to pursue.
Und loudly he after him hollers,
Till de vales mit de cliffers loud rang:
"You hafe gifed me nineten too moosh dollars,
Hold Hard!" cried der Ritter von Slang.
De oldt man ope his eyes like a casement,
Und laid a cold hand on his prow,
Denn mutter in ootmosdt amazement,
"Vot manner of mordal art dou?
I hafe lifed in dis world a yar tausend,
Und nefer yed met soosh a ding!
Yet you find it hart vork to pe spouse, and
Peloved by de Lady von Sling!
"Und she vant you to roll from de tower
Down shteps to yon rifulet spot."
(Here de knight, whom amazement o'erbower,
Cried, "Himmels potz pumpen Herr Gott!")
Boot de oldt veller saidt: "I'll arrange it,
Let your droples und sorrows co hang!
Und nodings vill coom to derange it
Pet high on it, Ritter von Slang.
"So get oop dis small oonderstandin,
Dat tomorrow by ten, do you hear?
You'll pe mit your trunk at de landin;
I'll also be derenefer fear!
Und I dinks we shall make your young voman
A new kind of meloty sing;
Dat vain, wicked, cruel, unhuman,
Gotttamnaple Fraulein von Sling."
De fiolet shdars vere apofe him,
Vhite moths und vhite dofes shimmered round,
All nature seemed seekin to lofe him,
Mit perfume und vision und sound.
De liddle oldt veller hat fanished,
In a harplike, melotious twang;
Und mit him all sorrow vas panished
Afay from der Steinli von Slang.
III.
Id vas morn, und de vorldt hat assempled
Mid panners und lances und dust,
Boot de heart of de Paroness trempled,
Und ofden her folly she cussed.
For she found dat der Ritter vould do it,
The Breitmann Ballads
STEINLI VON SLANG. 20
Page No 24
Und "die or get into de Ring,"
Und denn she'd pe cerdain to rue it,
Aldough she vas Lady von Sling.
For no man in Deutschland stood higher
Dan he mit de Minnesing crew,
He vas friendet to Heini von Steier,
Und Wolfram von Eschenbach too.
Und she dinked ash she look from de vinders,
How herzlich his braises dey sang;
"Now dey'll knock my goot name indo flinders,
For killin der Ritter von Slang."
Boot oh! der goot knight had a Schauer,
Und felt most ongommonly queer,
Vhen he find on de top of de dower
De goblum, pesite him, abbear.
Denn he find he no more could go valkin,
Und shtood, shoost and potrified ding,
Vhile de goblum vent round about talkin,
Und chaffin Plectruda von Sling.
Denn at vonce he see indo de problum,
Und vas stoggered like rats at ids vim:
His soul had gone indo de goblum,
Und de goblum's hat gone indo him.
Und de eyes of de volk vas enchanted,
Dere vas "glamour" oopon de whole gang;
For dey dinked dat dis veller who ranted
So loose, vas der Ritter von Slang.
Und, Lordt! how he dalked! Oonder heafens
Dere vas nefer soosh derriple witz,
Knockin all dings to sechses and sefens,
Und gifin Plectruda, Dutch fits.
Mein Gott! how he poonished und chaffed her
Like a hellstingin, devilborn ding;
Vhile de volk lay arollin mit laughter
At Fraulein Plectruda von Sling.
De lady grew angry und paler,
De lady grew ratful und red,
She felt some Satanical jailer
Hafe brisoned de tongue in her head.
She moost laugh vhen she vant to pe cryin,
Und vas crushed mit de teufelisch clang,
Till she knelt herself, pooty near dyin,
To dis derriple image of Slang.
Denn der goblum shoomp oop to der ceiling
Und trow sommerseds round on de vloor,
The Breitmann Ballads
STEINLI VON SLANG. 21
Page No 25
Right ofer Plectruda akneelin,
Dill she look more a vool dan pefore.
Denn he roll down de shteps light und breezy,
His laughs made it all apout ring;
Ash he shveared dere vas noding more easy
Dan to win a Plectruda von Sling.
Und vhen he cot down to de pottom,
He laugh so to freezen your plood;
Und schwear dat de boomps ash he cot em
Hafe make him feel petter ash good.
Boot, oh! how dey shook at his power,
Vhen he toorned himself roundt mit a bang,
Und roll oop to de dop of de tower,
To change forms mit de oder Von Slang!
Denn all in an insdand vas altered,
Der Steinli vas coom to himself;
Und de sprite, vitch in double sense paltered,
From dat moment acain vas an elf.
Dey shdill dinked dat he vas de person
Who had bobbed oop and down on de ving,
Und knew not who 'tvas lay de curse on
De peaudiful Lady von Sling.
Nunendlich Plectruda repented,
Und gazed on der Ritter mit shoy;
In dime to pe married consented,
Und vas plessed mit a peautifool poy.
A dwenty gold biece on his bosom
Vhen geporn vas tiscofered to hang
Mit de inscript"Dis dime dont refuse em"
So endet de tale of Von Slang.
Dresden, 1870.
TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN.
Si liceret te amare
Ad Suevorum magnum mare
Sponsam te perducerem
Tristicia Amorosa.
Frau Aventiure,
von J. V. Scheffel.
VILL'ST dou learn die Deutsche Sprache?
Denn set it on your card,
The Breitmann Ballads
TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN. 22
Page No 26
Dat all the nouns have shenders,
Und de shenders all are hard.
Dere ish also dings called pronoms,
Vitch id's shoost ash vell to know;
Boot ach! de verbs or timewords
Dey'll work you bitter woe.
Will'st dou learn de Deutsche Sprche?
Den you allatag moost go
To sinfonies, sonatas,
Or an oratorio.
Vhen you dinks you knows 'pout musik,
More ash any other man,
Be sure de soul of Deutschland
Into your soul ish ran.
Will'st dou learn de Deutsche Sprache?
Dou moost eat apout a peck
A week of stinging sauerkraut,[4]
Und sefen pfoundts of speck.
Mit Gott knows vot in vinegar,
Und deuce knows vot in rum:
Dis ish de only cerdain vay
To make de accents coom.
Will'st dou learn de Deutsche Sprache?
Brepare dein soul to shtand
Soosh sendences ash ne'er vas heardt
In any oder land.
Till dou canst make parentheses
Intwistedohne zahl
Dann wirst du erst Deutschfertig seyn,[5]
For a languashe ideal.
Will'st dou learn de Deutsche Sprache?
Du must mitout an fear
Trink afery tay an gallon dry,
Of foamin Sherman bier.
Und de more you trinks, pe certain,
More Deutsch you'll surely pe;
For Gambrinus ish de Emperor
Of de whole of Germany.
Will'st dou learn de Deutsche Sprache?
Be sholly, brav, und treu,
For dat veller ish kein Deutscher
Who ish not a sholly poy.
Find out vot means Gemutlichkeit,
Und do it mitout fail,
In Sang und Klang dein Lebenlang,[6]
A brickganz kreuzfidel.
The Breitmann Ballads
TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN. 23
Page No 27
Willst dou learn de Deutsche Sprache?
If a shendleman dou art,
Denn shtrike right indo Deutschland,
Und get a schveetes heart.
From Schwabenland or Sachsen
Vhere now dis writer pees;
Und de bretty girls all wachsen
Shoost like aepples on de drees.
Boot if dou bee'st a laty,
Denn on de oder hand,
Take a blonde moustachioed lofer
In de vine green Sherman land.
Und if you shoost kit married
(Vood mit vood soon makes a vire),
You'll learn to sprechen Deutsch mein kind,
Ash fast ash you tesire.
Dresden, January 1870.
LOVE SONG
Vulnerasti cor meum, soror mea sponsa.
O VERE mine lofe a sugarpowl,
De fery shmallest loomp
Vouldt shveet de seas, from pole to pole,
Und make de shildren shoomp.
Und if she vere a cloferfield,
I'd bet my only pence,
It vouldn't pe no dime at all
Pefore I'd shoomp de fence.
Her heafenly foice, it drill me so,
It oftdimes seems to hoort,
She ish de holiest anamile
Dat roons oopon de dirt.
De renpow rises vhen she sings,
De sonnshine vhen she dalk;
De angels crow und flop deir vings
Vhen she goes out to valk.
So livin white, so carnadine,
Mine lofe's gomblexion show;
It's shoost like Abendcarmosine,
Rich gleamin on de shnow.
The Breitmann Ballads
LOVE SONG 24
Page No 28
Her soul makes plushes in her sheek
Ash sommer reds de wein,
Or sonnlight sends a fire life troo
An blank Karfunkelstein.
De uberschwengliche idees
Dis lofe poot in my mind,
Vouldt make a foostrate philosoph
Of any human kind.
'Tis schudderin schveet on eart to meet
An himmlischhoellisch Qual;
Und treat mitwhiles to Kummel Schnapps
De schoenheitsideal.
Dein Fuss seind weiss wie Kreiden,
Dein Ermlein Helfenbein,
Dein ganzer Leib ist Seiden
Dein Brust wie Marmelstein
Javot de older boet sang,
I sing of deedou Fine!
Dou'rt soul und pody, heart und life
Glatt, zart, gelind, und rein.[7]
DER FREISCHUTZ
AIR "Der Pabst lebt,"
WIE gehts, my frendtsif you'll allow
I sings you rite afay shoost now
Some dretful shdories vitch dey calls
Der Freyschutz, or de Magic Balls.
Wohl in Bohemian land it cooms,
Vhere folk trink prandy mate of plooms;[8]
Dere lifed ein YaegerMaxerl Schmit
Who shot mit goons und nefer hit.
Now dere vas von oldt Yaeger, who
Says, "Maxerl, dis vill nefer do;
If you shouldt miss on drialtay,
Dere'll pe der tyfel denn to bay.
"If you do miss, you shtupid coose,
Dere'll pe de donnerwetter loose;
For you shant hafe mine taughter's hand,
Nor pe der Hertzhog's yaegersmann."
Id coomed pefore de tay vas set,
The Breitmann Ballads
DER FREISCHUTZ 25
Page No 29
Dat all de shaps togeder met;
Und Max he fired his goon und missed,
Und all de gals cot roundt und hissed.
Dey laughed pefore und hissed pehind;
Boot von shapKasparsaidt, "Ton't mind;
I dells you votyou stoons 'em alls
If yoost you shoodt mit magic balls."
"De magic balls! oh, vot is dat?"
"I cot soom in my hoontin' hat;
Dey're plack as kohl, und shoodt so drue:
Oh, dem's de kindt of balls for you.
"You see dat eagle vlyin' high,
Ein hoondred miles oop in de sky;
Shoot at dat eagle mit your bix,
You kills hin tead ash doonderblix!"
"I ton't pelieve de dings you say."
"You fool," says Kasp, "denn plaze afay!"
He plazed afay, vhen, sure as plood,
Down coom de eagle in de mud.
"O was ist das?" said Maxerl Schmit:
"Vhy! dat's de eagle vot you hit.
You kills him vhen you plaze afay;
Boot dat's a ding you nix verstay.
"Und you moost go to make dem balls
To de Wolf's Glen vhen mitnight valls.
Dow know'st de shpotalone und late"
"Oh jaI know shim ganz foostrate!
"Boot denn I does not like to co
Among dem dings." Says Kasp, "Ach, 'sho!
I'll help you fix dem tyfel chaps,
Like a goot vellerdake some schnapps!"
("Hilf Zamiel! hilf")"Here, dake some more!'
Denn Kasp vent shtompin' roundt de vloor,
Und coomed his hoompugs ofer Schmit,
Dill Max saidt, "Nunich gehe mit!"
All in de finster mitternocht,
Vhen oder folk in shleep vas lockt,
Down in de Wolfschlucht, Kasp tid dry
His tyfelstrikes und Hexery.
Mit skools und pones he mate a ring,
De howls und shpooks pegin to sing,
The Breitmann Ballads
DER FREISCHUTZ 26
Page No 30
Und all the tyfels oonder croundt
Coom preakin' loose und rooshin' roundt.
Denn Maxerl cooms along: says he,
"Mein Gott! vot dings ish dis I see!
I dinks de fery tyfel und all
Moost help to make dem magic ball.
"I vish dat I had nix cum raus,
Und shtaid mineself in bett to house."
"Hilf Zamiel!" cried Kasp; "you whelp
You red Dootch tyfelcoom und help!"
Den oop dere coomed a tredfull shdorm,
De todtengrips aroundt tid schvarm;
De howl shoomped oop und flopt his vings
Und toorned his het like avery dings.
Oop droo de croundt dere coomed a pot
Mit leadt, und dings to make de shot;
Und hoellisch fire in grimson plaze,
Und awful schmells like Schweitzer kase.
Agross de scene a pineshtick flew
Mit seferal shailpirds vastened to;
Six treadtful shailpirds mit deir vings
Tied to de shticks mit magic shtrings.
All droo de air, all in a row,
Die wilde Jagd vas seen to go;
De hounds und teer all mate of pone,
Und hoonted py a skilleton.
Dere coomed a tredful shpecdre pig,
Who, shpitten' fire afay, tid dig;
Und fiery drocks und tyfelshnake
A scootin' droo de air tid preak.
Boot Kaspar tidn't mindt dem alls,
But casted out de pullet balls;
Six vas to go ash he vouldt like,
De sevent' moost for de tyfel shtrike.
Ad last, oopon de drial tay,
De gals cot roundt so nice und gay,
Und den dey goed und maked a tantz,
Und singed apout de Jungfernkranz.
Und denn der Hertshogdat's der Duke
Cooms doun und dinks he'll dake a look;
"Young mans," to Maxerl denn saidt he,
The Breitmann Ballads
DER FREISCHUTZ 27
Page No 31
"Shoost shoot dem dove oopon dat dree!"
Denn Maxerl pointed mit de bix,
"Potzblitz!" says he, "dat dove I'll fix!"
He fired his rifle at de Taub',
When Kass rollt ofer in de Staub.
De pride she falled too in de doost,
Dey gals dey cried, de men dey got coossed:
Der Hertshog says, "Id's fery glear
Dat dere has peen some tyfels here!
"Und Max has shot mit tyfelsblei!
Pfui!die verfluchte Hexerei!
O Maximilian! O Du
Gehst nit mit rechten Dingen zu!"
Boot denn a hermits coomed in late;
Says he, "I'll fix dese dings foostrate;"
Und telled der Hertshog dat yung men
Vill raise der Tyfel now und denn.
De Duke forgifed de Kaspar dann,
Und mate of him a Yaegersmann,
Vhat shoodts mit bixen goon, und pfeil,
Und talks apout de Waidmannsheil.
Und denn de pride she coomed to life,
Und cot to pe de Maxerl's vife;
Denn all de beoples gried "Hoorah!
Das ist recht brav! und hopsasa!"
MORAL
Py dis dings may pe oondershtood
Dat vhat is pad works ofden goot:
Or, Maximilia maximilibus curanturif you will.
WEIN GEIST
I STOOMPLED oud ov a dafern,
Breauscht mit a gallon of wein,
Und I rooshed along de strassen,
Like a derriple Eberschwein.
Und like a lordly boarpig,
I doomplet de soper folk;
The Breitmann Ballads
WEIN GEIST 28
Page No 32
Und I trowed a shtone droo a shdreed lamp,
Und bot' of de classes I proke.
Und a gal vent roonin' bast me,
Like a vild coose on de vings,
Boot I gatch her for all her skreechin',
Und giss her like efery dings.
Und denn mit an board und a parell,
I blay de horseviddle a biece,
Dill de neighbours shkreem "deat'!" und "murder!"
Und holler aloudt "bolice!"
Und vhen der crim night waechter
Says all of dis foon moost shtop,
I oop mit mein oomberella,
Und schlog him ober de kop.
I leaf him like tead on de bavemend,
Und roosh droo a darklin' lane,
Dill moonlighd und tisdand musik,
Pring me roundt to my soul again.
Und I sits all oonder de linden,
De heartsleaf linden dree;
Und I dink of de quick gevanisht lofe
Dat vent like de vind from me.
Und I voonders in mine dipsyhood,
If a damsel or dream vas she!
Dis life is all a lindens
Mit holes dat show de plue,
Und pedween de finite pranches
Cooms Himmellight shinin' troo.
De blaetter are raushlin' o'er me,
Und efery leaf ish a fay,
Und dey vait dill de windsbraut comet,
To pear dem in Fall afay.
Denn I coomed to a rock py der rifer,
Vhere a stein ish of harpe form,
Jahrdausand in, oud, it standet'
Und nopody blays but de shtorm.
Here, vonce on a dimes, a vitches,
Soom melodies here peginned,
De harpe ward all zu steine,
Die melodie ward zu wind.
Und so mit dis toxigation,
The Breitmann Ballads
WEIN GEIST 29
Page No 33
Vitch hardens de outer Me;
Ueber stein and schwein, de weine
Shdill harps oud a melodie.
Boot deeper de Urlied ringet',
Ober stein und wein und svines,
Dill it endeth vhere all peginnet,
Und alles wird ewig zu eins,
In de dipsy, treamless sloomper
Vhich units de Nichts und Seyns.
Und im Mondenlicht it moormoors,
Und it burns by waken wein,
In Madchenlieb or Schnapsenrausch
Das Absolut ist dein.
SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE.
Die Speer die er thut fuhren
die ist sehr gross und lang,
Das sollt du glauben mire,
gemacht von Vogelsgang.
Sein Ross das ist die Heide,
das sollt du glauben mir,
Darauf er nun thut reiten,
fuhrwahr das sag ich dir.
Ein schon nerr Lied von dem Mai Und
von dem Herbst. 16th century.
I. PROLOGUE.
HERR SCHNITZERL make a ph'losopede,
Von of de pullyest kind;
It vent mitout a vheel in front,
And hadn't none pehind.
Von vheel vas in de mittel, dough,
And it vent as sure ash ecks,
For he shtraddled on de axel dree,
Mit der vheel petween his lecks.
Und vhen he vant to shtart it off
The Breitmann Ballads
SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE. 30
Page No 34
He paddlet mit his feet,
Und soon he cot to go so vast
Dat efery dings he peat.
He run her out on Broader shtreed,
He shkeeted like der vind,
Hei! how he bassed de vancy crabs,
And lef dem all pehind!
De vellers mit de trottin nags
Pooled oop to see him bass;
De Deutschers all erstaunished saidt:
"Potztausend! Was ist das?"
Boot vaster shtill der Schnitzerl flewed
On mit a ghastly shmile;
He tidn't tooch de dirt, py shings!
Not vonce in half a mile.
Oh, vot ish all dis eart'ly pliss?
Oh, vot ish man's soocksess?
Oh, vot ish various kinds of dings?
Und vot ish hobbiness?
Ve find a pank node in de shtreedt,
Next dings der pank ish preak!
Ve folls, and knocks our outsides in,
Vhen ve a ten shtrike make.
So vas it mit der Schnitzerlein
On his philosopede.
His feet both shlipped outsidevard shoost
Vhen at his exdra shpeed.
He felled oopon der vheel of coorse;
De vheel like blitzen flew!
Und Schnitzerl he vos schnitz in vact,
For it shlished him grod in two.
Und as for his philosopede,
Id cot so shkared, men say,
It pounded onward till it vent
Ganz tyfelwards afay.
Boot vhere ish now der Schnitzerl's soul?
Vhere dos his shbirit pide?
In Himmel droo de endless plue,
It takes a medeor ride.
The Breitmann Ballads
SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE. 31
Page No 35
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE.
Vhen Breitmann hear dat Schnitzerl
Vas quardered into dwo,
Und how his crate philosopede
To 'm tyfel had peen flew,
He dinked und dinked so heafy,
Ash only Deutschers can,
Denn saidt, "Who mighdt peliefet
Dish is de ent of man?"
"De human souls of beoples
Exisdt in deir idees,
Und dis of Wolfram Schnitzerl
Mighdt drafel many vays.
In his Bestimmung des Menschen
Der Fichte makes pelieve,
Dat ve brogress oonendtly
In vhat pehindt ve leave.
"De shparrow falls grounddownvarts
Or drafels to de West;
De shparrows dat coom afder,
Bild shoost de same old nest.
Man had not vings or fedders,
Und in oder dings, 'tis set,
He tont coom up to shparrows,
But on nests he goes ahet.
"O! vliest dou droo bornin' vorldts,
Und nebuloser foam,
By monsdrous mitnight shiant forms,
Or vhere red tyfels roam;
Or vhere de ghosdts of shkyrockets
Peyond creation flee?
Vhere e'er dou art, O Schnitzerlein,
Crate Saindt! Look down on me!
"Und deach me how you maket
Dat crate philosopede,
Vhich roon dwice six mals vaster
Ash any Arap shteed.
Und deach me how to 'stonish volk,
Und knock dem oud de shpots.
Coom pack to eart', O Schnitzerlein,
Und pring id down to dots!"
Shoost ash dish vordt vent outvarts,
Hans dinked he saw a vlash,
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 32
Page No 36
Und oonterwards de dable
He doompelt mit a crash.
Und to him, moong de glasses,
Und pottles ash vas proke,
Mit his het in a cigarbox,
A foice from Himmel shpoke:
"Adsum, Domine Breitmann!
Herr Copitain, here I pe!
So dell me rite honeste,
Quare inquietasti me?
Te video inter spoonibus,
Et largis glassis too,
Cerevisia repletis,
Sicut percussus tonitru!"
Denn Breitmann ansver Schnitzerl;
"Coarctor nimis, see!
Siquidem Philistiim
Pugnant adversum me.
Ergo vocavi te,
Ash Saul vocavit Sam
Uel, ut mi ostenderes
Quid teufel faciam?"
Denn de shpirit (in Lateinisch)
Saidt "Bene, dat's de talk,
Non habes in hoc shanty,
A shingle et some chalk?
Non video inkum nec calamos
(I shpose some bummer shdole 'em),
Levate oculos tuos, son,
Et aspice ad linteolum!"
Denn Breitmann see de biece of chalk
Vhich riset vrom de vloor,
Und signed a fine philosopede
Alone, oopon de toor.
De von dat Schnitzerl fobricate,
Und oonderneat' he see:
Probate inter equites,
(Try dis in de cavallrie).
Der Breitmann shtood oop from de vloor,
Und leanet on a post;
Und saidt: "If dis couldt, shouldt hafe peen,
Dar vouldt, mighdt peen a ghosdt;
Boot if id pe noumenon,
Phenomenoned indeed,
Or de soobyectif obyectified,
I'fe cot de philosopede."
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 33
Page No 37
Denn out he seekt a plackschmit,
Ash vork in ironsteel,
To make him a philosopede
Mit shoost an only vheel.
De dings vas maket simple,
Ash all crate idees shouldt pe,
For 'tvas noding boot a gartvheel,
Mit a dwofeet axel dree.
De dimes der Breitmann doomple,
In learnin' for to ride,
Vas ofdener ash de sandcrains
Dat rollen in de tide.
De dimes he cot oopsettet,
In shdeerin' left und righdt,
Vas ofdener ash de cleamin' shdars,
Dat shtud de shky py night.
Boot de vorstest of de veadures
In dis vonvheel horse, you pet,
Ish dat man couldt go so nicely,
Pefore he get oopset.
Some dimes he co like plazes,
Und doorn her, extrafine;
Und denn shlop ofer dis is vot
Hafe kill der Schnitzerlein.
Soosh droples ash der Breitmann hafe,
To make dis 'vention go,
Vas nefer seen py mordal man,
Oopon dis vorldt pelow.
He doomplet righdt he doomplet left,
He hafe a dousand doomps;
Dere nefer vas a gricket ball
Ash get soosh 'fernal boomps.
Boot ash he'd shvearet he'd poot it droo,
He shvear't it moost pe tone;
Dough he schimpft' und flucht' gar laesterlich,
He visht he't ne'er pegun.
Mit "Hagel! Blitz! Kreuzsakrament!"
He maket de Houser ring,
Und vish der Schnitzerl vas in hell,
For deachin' him dis ding.
Nun goot! At lasht he cot it,
Und peautifool he goed,
"Dis day," saidt he, "I'll 'stonish folk
A ridin' in de road.
Dis day, py shings! I'll do it,
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 34
Page No 38
Und knock dings oud of sight:"
Ach weh! for Breitmann dat day
Vas not bemarkt mit vhite.
De noombers of de Deutsche volk,
Dat coomed dis sighdt to see,
I dink, in soper earnsthood,
Mighdt not gereckonet pe.
For miles dey shtoodt along de road,
Mein Gott! boot dey wer'n dry;
Dey trinket den lagerbier shops out,
Pefore der Hans coom py.
Vhen all at vonce drementous gries
De fery coondry shook,
Und beople's shkreemt, "Da ist er! Schau!
Here cooms der Breitmann, look!"
Mein Gott! vas efer soosh a sighdt!
Vas efer soosh a gry!
Vhen like a brickpat in a vighdt,
Der Breitemann roosh py?
Oh mordal man! Vhy ish idt, dou
Hast passion to go vast?
Vhy ish id dat te tog und horse
Likes shbeed too quick to lasht?
De pugs, de pirds, de pumplepees,
Und all dat ish, 'tvouldt seem
Ish nefer hobby boot, exsepdt,
Vhen pilin' on de shdeam.
Der Breitmann flew! Von mighdy gry
Ash he vent scootin' bast;
Von derriple, drementous yell;
Dat day de virst und lasht.
Vot ha! Vot ho! Vhy ish it dus?
Vhot makes dem shdare aghasht?
Vhy cooms dat vail of vild deshbair?
Ish somedings cot geshmasht?
Yea, efen so. Yea, ferily,
Shbeak, soul!it ish dy biz!
Der Breitmann shkeet so vast along
Dey fairly heard him whizz.
Vhen shoost oopon a hilltop point
It caught a pranch gebent,
Und like an apple from a shling,
Afay Hans Breitmann vent.
Vent droo de air an hoondert feet
Allowin' more or lees:
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 35
Page No 39
Denn, pobpobpob a mile or dwo
He rollet along I guess.
Say hast dou seen a gannon ball
Half shpent, shtill poundin' on,
Like made of gummilasticum?
So vent der Breitmann.
Dey bick him oop dey pring him in,
No wort der Breitmann shboke.
Der doktor look he shwear erstaunt
Dat nodings ish peen proke.
"He rollt de rocky road entlang,
He pounce o'er shtock und shtone,
You'd dink he'd knocked his outsites in,
Yet nefer preak a pone!"
All shtill Hans lay, bevilderfied;
He seemt not mind de shaps,
Nor mofed oontil der medicus
Hafe dose him vell mit schnapps.
De schmell voke oop de boetry
Of tays vhen he vas yoong,
Und he murmulte de fragmends
Of an sad romantish song:
"Ash sommer pring de roses
Und roses pring de dew,
So Deutschland gifes de maidens
Who fetch de bier for you.
Komm Maidelein! rothe Waengelein!
Mit weinglass in your paw!
Ve'll get troonk among de roses,
Und pe soper on de shtraw!
"Ash vinter pring de icewind
Vitch plow o'er Burg und hill,
Hard times pring in de landlord,
Und de landlord pring the pill.
Boot sing Maidelein rothe Waengelein!
Mit wein glass in your paw!
Ve'll get troonk among de roses,
Und pe soper on de shtraw!"
Dey dook der Breitmann homewarts,
Boot efer on de vay
He nefer shpeaket no man,
Und nodings else couldt say,
Boot, "Maidelein rothe Waengelein!
Mit weinglass in her paw,
Ve'll get troonk among de roses,
Und pe soper on de shtraw!"
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 36
Page No 40
Dey laid der Hans im bette,
Peneat' de eider doun,
Und sembelet all de doktors
Who doktor in de town,
Dat ish, de Deutsche Aertzte,
For Breitmann alvays says,
De Deutschers ish de onlies
Mit originell idees.
Der vas Doktor Moritz Schlinkenschlag,
Dat vork ash Cafeopath,
Und de learned Cobus Schoepfskopf,
Who use de milchy bath;
Und Korschalitschky aus Boehmen,
Vhat cure mit slibovitz,
Und Wechselbalg, der Preusse,
Who only 'tend to fits.
Dere vas Strobbich aus Westfalen,
Who mofe all eart'ly ills
Mit concentrirter Schinken juice,
Und Pumpernickel pills.
Und a bierkur man from Munich,
Und a grapecurist from Rhein,
Und von who shkare tiseases
Mit a dose of Schlesierwein.
So dey meet in consooldation,
Mit Doktor Winkeleck,
Who proctice "renovation"
Mit sauerkraut und speck.
Und dat no man shouldt pe shlightet,
Or dreatet ash a tunce,
Dey 'greed to dry deir systems
Oopon Breitmann all at vonce.
Dat ish, mit de exscepdion
Of gifin' Schlesierwein:
For de remedy vas dangerfull
For von who trink from Rhein.
Ash der Teufel vonce deklaret,
Vhen he taste it on a shpree,
Dat a man, to trink soosh liquor,
Moost a porn Silesian pe.
So dey all vent los at Breitmann,
Und woonderfool to dell,
He coom to his Gesundheit,
Und pooty soon cot vell.
Some hinted at Natura,
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE. 37
Page No 41
Mit her olt vis sanatrix,
Boot eash doktor shvore he curet him,
Und de rest were taugenix.
I know not vot der Breitmann
More newly has pegun;
Boot dey say he talks daydayly
Mit Dana of de Sun.
Dey talk in Deutsch togeder,
Und volk say de end will be,
Philosopedal shanges
In de Union Cavallrie.
Gott helf de howlin' safage!
Got helf de Indian!
Shouldt Breitmann shoin his forces
Mit Sheneral Sheridan!
Und denn, to sing his braises,
I'll write anoder lied:
Hier hat dis dale an ende,
Of Breitmann's Philosopede!
DIE SCHONE WITTWE[9]
(DE POOTY VIDOW.)
I. VOT DE YANKEE CHAP SUNG.
DAT pooty liddle vidow
Vot ve dosh'nt vish to name,
Ish still leben on dat liddle shtreet,
A doin' shoost de same.
De glerks aroundt de gorners
Somedimes goes round to zee
How die tarlin' liddle vitchy ees,
Und ask 'er how she pe.
Dey lofes her ver' goot liquoer,
Dey lofes her liddle shtore;
Dey lofes her little paby,
But dey lofes die vidow more.
To dalk mit dat shveet vidow,
Ven she hands das lager round,
Vill make der shap dat does id
The Breitmann Ballads
DIE SCHONE WITTWE[9] 38
Page No 42
Pe happy, ve'll be pound.
Dat ish if we can vell pelieve
De glerks vat drinks das beer,
Who goes in dere for noding elshe,
Put simply for to zee her.
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT.
Oh yes I know die wittwe,
Mit eyes so prite und proun!
She's de allerschoenste wittwe
Vot live in dis here down.
In her plack silk gown mine grashious!
All puttoned to de neck
Und a pooty liddle collar,
Mitout a shpot or shpeck.
Ho! clear de drack you oder fraus
You can't pegin to shine
Vhen de lofely vidder cooms along
Dis vidder ash ish mine!
Ho! clear de drack you Yankee chaps,
You Englishers und sooch,
You can't pegin to coot me out,
Mitout you dalks in Dootch.
Ich hab die schoene wittwe
Schon lange nit gesehn,
Ich sah sie gestern Abend
Wohl bei dem Counter Stehn.
Die Wangen rein wie Milch and Blut
Die Augen hell und klar.
Ich hab sie sechsmal auch gekusst
Potztausend! das ist wahr.[10]
BREITMANN IN BATTLE
"TUNC TAPFRE AUSFUHRERE STREITUM ET RITTRIS DIGNUM POTUERE ERIAGERE
LOBUM."
"Hiltibraht enti Hadubrant."
DER FADER UND DER SON.[11]
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT. 39
Page No 43
I DINKS I'll go a vightin'" outshpoke der Breitemann.
"It's eighdeen hoonderd fordyeight since I kits swordt in hand;
Dese fourdeen years mit Hecker all roostin' I haf been,
Boot now I kicks der Teufel oop and goes for sailin' in."
"If you go land outridin'," said Caspar Pickletongue,
"Foost ding you knows you cooms across some repels prave and young.
Away down Sout' in Tixey, dey'll split you like a clam"
"For dat," spoke out der Breitmann, "I doos not gare one tam!
"Who der Teufel pe's de repels, und vhere dey kits deir sass?
If dey make a run on Breitmann he'll soon let out de gas;
I'll shplit dem like kartoffels; I'll schlog em on de kop;
I'll set de plackguarts roonin' so, dey don't know vhere to shtop."
Und de outshpoke der Breitmann, mit his schlaeger py his side:
"Forvarts, my pully landsmen! it's dime to run and ride;
Vill riden, vill vighten der Copitain I'll pe,
It's sporn und horn und saddle now all in de Cavallrie!"
Und ash dey rode droo Vinchesder, so herrlich to be seen,
Dere coomed some repel cavallrie a riden' on de creen;
Mit a sassy repel Dootchman an colonel in gommand,
Says he, "Vot Teufel makes you here in dis mein Faderland?
"You're dressed oop like a shentleman mit your
plackguart Yankee crew,
You mudsills and meganics! Der Teufel put you droo!
Old Yank, you ought to shtay at home und dake your liddle horn,
Mit some oldt voomans for a noorse" der Breitmann
laugh mit shkorn.
"Und should I trink mein lager beer und roost mine self to home?
I'fe got too many dings like you to mash beneat' my thoom:
In many a fray und fierce foray dis Dootchman will be feared
Pefore he stops dis vightin' trade 'twas dere he grayed
his peard."
"I pools dat peard out py de roots I gifes him such a dwist
Dill all de plood roons out, you tamned old Apolitionist!
You creenpacks mit your swordt und vatch, right ofer
you moost shell,
Und den you goes to Libby stright und after dat to hll!"
"Mein creenpacks and mein schlaeger, I kits 'em in New York,
To gife dem up to creenhorns, young man, is not de talk;"
De heroes shtopped deir sassin' here und grossed deir sabres dwice,
Und de vay dese Deutschers vent to vork vos von pig ding on ice.
Der younger fetch de older such a gottallmachty shmack
Der Breitmann dinks he really hears his skool go shplit and crack;
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT. 40
Page No 44
Der repel shoomps dwelfe paces back, und so he safe his life:
Der Breitmann says: "I guess dem shoomps, you
learns dem of your vife."
"If I should learn of vomans I dinks it vere a shame,
Bei Gott I am a shentleman, aristograt, and game.
My fader vos anoder I lose him fery young
Der Teufel take your soul! Coom on! I'll split your
vaggin' tongue!"
A Yankee drick der Breitmann dried dat oldt graypearded man
For ash the repel raised his swordt, beneat' dat sword he ran.
All round der shlim yoong repels vaist his arms oldt
Breitmann pound,
Und shlinged him down oopon his pack and laidt him on der ground.
"Who rubs against olt kittlepots may keep vhite if he can,
Say vot you dinks of vightin' now mit dis oldt shentleman?
Your dime is oop; you got to die, und I your breest vill pe;
Peliev'st dou in Moral Ideas? If so, I lets you free."[12]
"I don't know nix apout ideas no more dan 'pout Saint Paul,
Since I'fe peen down in Tixey I kits no books at all;
I'm greener ash de clofergrass; I'm shtupid as a shpoon;
I'm ignoranter ash de nigs for dey takes de Tribune.
"Mein fader's name vas Breitmann, I heard mein mutter say,
She read de bapers dat he died after she rooned afay;
Dey say he leaf some broperty berhaps 'tvas all a sell
If I could lay mein hands on it I likes it mighty vell."
"Und vas dy fader Breitmann? Bist du his kit and kin?
Denn know dat ich der Breitmann dein lieber Vater bin?"
Der Breitmann poolled his handshoe off und shooked him py de hand;
"Ve'll hafe some trinks on strengt' of dis or else may
I be tam'd!"
"Oh! fader, how I shlog your kop," der younger Breitmann said;
"I'd den dimes sooner had it coom right down on mein own headt!"
"Oh, never mind dat soon dry oop I shticks him mit a blaster;
If I had shplit you like a fish, dat vere an vorse tisasder."
Dis fight did last all afternoon wohl to de fesper tide,
Und droo de streets of Vinchesder, der Breitmann he did ride.
Vot vears der Breitmann on his hat? De ploom of fictory!
Who's dat a ridin' py his side? "Dis here's mein son," says he.
How stately rode der Breitmann oop! how lordly he kit down!
How glorious from de great pokal he drink de beer so prown!
But der Younger bick der parrel oop und schwig him all at one.
"Bei Gott! dat settles all his dings I know dou art mein son!"
The Breitmann Ballads
II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT. 41
Page No 45
Der one has got a fader; de oder found a child.
Bofe ride oopon one warpath now in pattle fierce und vild.
It makes so glad our hearts to hear dat dey did so succeed
Und damit hat sein Ende DES JUNGEN BREITMANN'S LIED.
BREITMANN IN MARYLAND.
DER BREITMANN mit his gompany
Rode out in Marylandt.
"Dere's nix to trink in dis countrie;
ine droat's as dry as sand.
It's light canteen und haversack,
It's hoonger mixed mit doorst;
Und if ve had some lager beer
I'd trink oontil I boorst.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Ve'd trink oontil ve boorst.[13]
Herr Leut'nant, take a dozen men,
Und ride dis land around!
Herr Feldwebel, go foragin'
Dill somedings goot is found.
Gottsdonder! men, go ploonder!
Ve hafn't trinked a bit
Dis fourdeen hours! If I had beer
I'd sauf oontil I shplit!
Gling, glang, gloria!
Ve'd sauf oontil ve shplit!"
At mitternacht a horse's hoofs
Coom rattlin' droo de camp;
"Rouse dere! coom rouse der house dere!
Herr Copitain ve moost tromp!
De scouds have found a repel town,
Mit repel davern near,
A repel keller in de cround,
Mit repel lager beer!!
Gling, glang, gloria!
All fool of lager beer!"
Gottsdonnerkreuzschockschwerenoth!
How Breitmann broked de bush!
"O let me see dat lager beer!
O let me at him rush!
Und is mein sabre sharp und true,
Und is mein varhorse goot?
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN MARYLAND. 42
Page No 46
To get one quart of lager beer
I'd shpill a sea of ploot.
Gling, glang, gloria!
I'd shpill a sea of ploot.
"Fuenf hoonderd repels hold de down,
One hoonderd strong are ve;
Who gares a tam for all de odds
Vhen men so dirsty pe."
And in dey smashed and down dey crashed,
Like donderpolts dey fly,
Rash fort as der vild yaeger cooms
Mit blitzen droo de shky.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Like blitzen droo de shky.
How flewed to rite, how flewed to left
De moundains, drees, und hedge;
How left und rite de yaeger corps
Vent donderin' droo de pridge.
Und splash und splosh dey ford de shtream
Vhere not some pridges pe:
All dripplin' in de moondlight peam
Stracks vent de Cavallrie.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Der Breitmann's cavallrie.
Und hoory, hoory, on dey rote,
Oonheedin' vet or try;
Und horse und rider shnort and blowed
Und shparklin' bepples fly.
Ropp! Ropp! I shmell de parleyprew!
Dere's somedings goot ish near.
Ropp! Ropp! I scent de kneiperei;
Ve've got to lager beer!
Gling, glang, gloria!
Ve've got to lager beer!
Hei! how de carpine pullets klinged
Oopon de helmets hart!
Oh, Breitmann how dy sabre ringed;
Du alter Knasterbart!
De contrapands dey sing for shoy
To see de rebs go down,
Und hear der Breitmann grimly gry:
Hoorah! ve've dook de down.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Victoria, victoria!
De Dootch have dook de down.
Mid shout and crash and sabre flash,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN MARYLAND. 43
Page No 47
And vild husaren shout
De Dootchmen boorst de keller in,
Und rolled de lager out;
Und in de coorlin' powder shmoke,
Vhile shtill de pullets sung,
Dere shtood der Breitmann, axe in hand,
A knockin' out de boong.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Victoria! Encoria!
De shpicket beats de boong.
Gotts! vot a shpree der Breitmann had
Vhile yet his hand was red,
A trinkin' lager from his poots
Among de repel tead.[14]
"Tvas dus dey vent at mitternight
Along der moundain side;
'Tvas dus dey help make history!
Dis vas der Breitmann's ride.
Gling, glang, gloria!
Victoria! Victoria!
Cer'visia, encoria!
De treadful mitnight ride
Of Breitmann's vild Freischarlinger,
All famous, broad, und vide.
BREITMANN AS A BUMMER
DER SHENERAL SHERMAN holts oop on his coorse,
He shtops at de grossroad und reins in his horse.
"Dere's a ford on de rifer dis day we moost dake,
Or elshe de grand army in bieces shall preak!"
Vhen shoost ash dis vord from his lips had gone bast,
There coomed a young orterly gallopin' fast,
Who gry mit amazement: "Herr Shen'ral! Goot Lord!
Dat Bummer der Breitmann ish holdin' der ford!"
Der Shen'ral he ootered no hymn und no psalm,
But opened his lips und he priefly say "Dn!
Dere moost hafe been viskey on dat side der rifer;
To get it dose shaps vould set hell in a shiver;
But now dat dey hold it, ride quick to deir aid:
Ho, Sickles! move promp'ly, send down a prigade!
Dat Dootchman moost vork mighty hard mit his sword
If againsd a whole army he holds to de ford."
Dey spoored on, dey hoory'd on, gallopin' shtraight,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN AS A BUMMER 44
Page No 48
But for Breitmann help coomed shoost a liddle too late,
For as de Lauwine goes smash mit her pound,
So on to de Bummers de repels coom down:
Heinrich von Schinkenstein's tead in de road,
Dieterich Hinkelbein's flat as a toad;
Und Sepperl Tyroler shpoke nefer a vord,
But shoost "Mutter Gottes!" und died in de ford.
Itsch'l of Innspruck ish drilled droo de hair,
Einer aus Boblingen[15] he too vash dere
Karli of Karlisruh's shot near de fence
(His horse vash o'erloadet mit toorkies und hens),
Und dough he like a ravin' mad cannibal fought
Yet der Breitmann der capt'n der hero vash caught;
Und de last dings ve saw, he vas tied mit a cord,
For de repels had goppled him oop at de ford.
Dey shtripped off his goat und skyugled his poots
Dey dressed him mit rags of a repel recruits;
But von grayhaared oldt veller shmiled crimly und bet
Dat Breitmann vouldt be a pad egg for dem yet.
"He has more on his pipe[16] as dem vellers allows,
He has cardts yet in hand und das Spiel ist nicht aus,
Dey'll find dat dey took in der Teufel to board,
De day dey pooled Breitmann vell ofer de ford."
In de Bowery each beerhaus mit crape vas oopdone,
Vhen dey read in de papers dat Breitmann vas gone;
Und de Dootch all cot troonk oopon lager und wein,
At the great Trauerfest of de Turner Verein.
Dere vas wein en mit weinen ven beoplesh did dink
Dat Sherman's great Sharman cood nefer more trink.
Und in Villiam Shtreet veepin' und vailen' vas hoor'd,
Pecause der Hans Breitmann vas lost at de ford.
SECOND PART.
In dulce jubilo now ve all sings,
Avaifin' de panners like efery dings.
De preeze droo de binetrees ish cooler und salt,
Und der Shen'ral is merry venefer ve halt;
Loosty und merry he schmells at de preeze,
Lustig und heiter he looks droo de drees,
Lustig und heiter ash vell he may pe,
For Sherman, at last has marched down to the sea.
Dere's a gry from de guart dere's a clotter und dramp,
Vhen dat fery same orterly rides droo de camp
The Breitmann Ballads
SECOND PART. 45
Page No 49
Who report on de ford. Dere ish droples and awe
In de face of de youf' apout somedings he saw;
Und he shpeak me in Fraentsch, like he always do: "Look!
Sagre pleu! Fentre Tieu! dere ish Breitmann his spook!
He ish goming dis vay! Nom de Garce![17] can it pe
Dat de spooks of de tead men coom down to de sea!"
Und he looks, und ve sees, und ve tremples mit tread,
For risin' all swart on de efenin' red
Vas Johannes der Breitmann der war es, bei Gott!
Coom riding' to oosvard, right shtraight to de shpot!
All mousestill ve shtood, yet mit oopshoompin' hearts,
For he look shoost so pig as de shiant of de Hartz;
Und I heard de Sout Deutschers say "Ave Morie!
Braise Gott all goot shpirids py land und by sea!"
Boot Itzig of Frankfort he lift oop his nose,
Und bemark dat de shpook hat peen changin' his clothes,
For he seemed like an Generalissimus drest
In a vlamin' new coat und magnificent vest.
Six bistols beschlagen mit silber he vore,
Und a cold mounded swordt like a Kaisar he bore,
Und ve dinks dat de ghosdt or votever he pe
Moost hafe proken some panks on his vay to de sea.
"Id is he!""Und er lebt noch!" he lifes ve all say:
"Der Breitmann Oldt Breitmann! Hans Breitmann! Herr Je!"
Und ve roosh to emprace him, und shtill more ve find
Dat vherefer he'd peen, he'd left noding pehine.
In bofe of his poots dere vas portemoneys crammed,
Mit creenpacks stoof full all his haversack jammed,
In his bockets cold dollars vere shinglin' deir doons
Mit dwo doozen votches und four dozen shpoons,
Und dwo silber teapods for makin' his dea,
Der ghosdt hafe pring mit him, en route to de sea.
Mit goot sweedbotatoes, und doorkies, und rice,
Ve makes him a sooper of efery dings nice.
Und de bummers hoont roundt apout, alle wie ein,
Dill dey findt a plantaschion mit parrels of wein.
Den t'vas "Here's to you, Breitmann! Alt Schwed"[18] bist zuruck?
Vot teufels you makes since dis fourteen nights veek?"
Und ve holds von shtupendous and derriple shpree
For shoy dat der Breitmann has got to de sea.
But in fain tid we ashk vhere der Breitmann hat peen,
Vot he tid; vot he pass droo or vot he might seen?
Vhere he kits his vine horse, or who gafe him dem woons,
Und how Brovidence plessed him mit teapods und shpoons?
For to all of dem queeries he only reblies,
"If you dells me no quesdions, I ashks you no lies!"
The Breitmann Ballads
SECOND PART. 46
Page No 50
So 'twas glear dat some derriple mysh'dry moost pe
Vhere he kits all dat ploonder he prings to de sea.
Dere ish bapers in Richmond dells derriple lies
How Sherman's grand armee hafe raise deir sooplies:
For ve readt in brindt dat der Sheneral Grant
Say de bummers hafe only shoost take vat dey vant.
But 'tis vhispered dat vhile a refolfer'll go round
Der BREITMANN vill nefer a peggin' be found;
Or shtarvin' ash brisner by doonder! not he,
Vhile der Teufel could help him to ged to de sea.
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH.
"Vides igitur, Collega carissime, visitationem canonicam esse rem
haud ita periculosam, sed valde amoenam, si modo vinum, groggio et
cibi praesto sunt."
Novissimae Epistolae Obscurorum Virorum, Berolini F.
Berggold, 1869. Epistola xxiii., p. 63.
D'VAS near de state of Nashfille,
In de town of Tennessee,
Der Breitmann vonce vas quarderd
Mit all his cavallrie.
Der Sheneral kept him glose in gamp,
He vouldn't let dem go;
Dey couldn't shdeal de first plack hen,
Or make de red cock crow.
Und virst der Breitmann vildly shmiled,
Und denn he madly shvore;
"Crate hl, mit shpoons und shinsherbread,
Can dis pe makin war?
Verdammt pe all der discipline!
Verdammt der Sheneral!
Vere I vonce on de road, his will,
Vere wurst mir und egal. [19]
"Oh vhere ish all de plazin roofs
Dat claddened vonce mine eyes?
Und vhere de crand plantaschions
Vhere ve gaddered many a brize?
Und vhere de plasted shpies ve hung
A howlin loud mit fear?
Und vhere de rascal pushwhackers
Ve shashed like vritened deer?
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 47
Page No 51
"De roofs are shtandin fast and firm
Mit repels blottin oonder;
De crand blantaschions lie round loose
For Morgan's men to ploonder!
De shpies go valkin out und in,
Ash sassy ash can pe;
Und in de voods de pushwhackers
Are makin foon of me!
"Oh vere I on my schimmel grey
Mein sabre in mein hand,
Dey should drack me py de ruins
Of de houses troo de land.
Dey should drack me py de puzzards
High sailen ofer head,
A vollowin der Breitmann's trail
To claw de repel dead."
Outspoke der bold Von Stossenheim,
Who had theories of Gott:
"O Breitmann, dis ish shoodgement on
De vays dat you hafe trot.
You only lifes to joy yourself,
Yet you, yourself moost say,
Dat selfdefelopment requires
De religios Idee."
Dey sat dem down and argued id,
Like Deutschers vree from fear,
Dill dey schmoke ten pounds of knaster,
Und drinked drei fass of bier.
Der Breitmann go py Schopenhauer,
Boot Veit he had him denn;
For he dook him on de angles
Of de moral oxygen.
Der Breitmann 'low, dat 'pentence,
Ish known in efery glime,
Und dat to grin und bear it
Vas healty und soopline.
"For mine Sout German Catolicks,
Id vas pe goot, I know;
Likevise dem Nordland Luterans,
If vonce to shoorsh dey go.
"Boot how vas id mit oders
Who dinks philosophie?
I don't begreif de matter,"
Said Stossenheim: "Denn see.
De more dat shoorsh disgoostet you,
Und make despise und bain,
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BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 48
Page No 52
De crater merid ish to go,
Und de crater ish your gain.
"I know a liddle shoorsh mineself,
Oopon de Bole Jack road:
(De rebs vonce shot dree Federals dere,
Ash into shoorsh dey goed.)
Dere you might make a bilcrimage,
Und do id in a tay:
Gott only knows vot dings you mighdt
Bick oop, oopon de vay."
Denn oop dere shpoke a contrapand,
Vas at de tent id's toor
"Dere's twenty bar'ls of whiskey, hid,
In dat tabernacle, shore.
A rebel he done gone and put
It in de cellar, true,
No libin man dat secret knows,
'Cept only me an' you."
Der Stossenheim, he grossed himself,
Und knelt peside de fence,
Und gried: "O Coptain Breitmannn, see,
Die finger Providence."
Der Breitmann droed his hat afay,
Says he, "Pe't hit or miss,
I'fe heard of miragles pefore,
Boot none so hunk ash dis."
"Wohlauf mine pully cafaliers,
Ve'll ride to shoorsh today,
Each man ash hasn't cot a horse
Moost shteal von, rite afay.
Dere's a raw, green corps from Michigan,
Mit horses on de loose,
You men ash vants some hoofirons,
Look out and crip deir shoes."
All brooshed und fixed, de cavallrie,
Rode out py moonen shine,
De cotton fields in shimmerin light,
Lay white as elfenbein.
Dey heard a shot close py Lavergne,
Und men who rode afay,
In de road avelterin his his ploot,
A Federal picket lay.
Und all dat he hafe dimes to say,
"Vhile shtandin at my post,
De guerillas got first shot at me,"
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 49
Page No 53
Und so gafe oop de ghost.
Denn a contrapand, who helt his head,
Said: "Sah dose grillers all
Is only half a mile from hy'ar,
A dancin at a ball."
Der Breitmann shpoke and brummed it out
Ash if his heart tid schvell:
"I'll gife dem music at dat pall
Vill tantz dem into hell."
Hei! arrowfast a teufel's ride!
De plack man led de vay,
Dey reach de house dey see de lights
Dey heard de fiddle blay.
Dey nefer vaited for a word
Boot galloped from de gloom,
Und, bang! a hoonderd carpine shots
Dey fired indo de room.
Oop vent de groans of vounded men,
De fittlin died away:
Boot some of dem vere tead pefore
De music ceased to blay.
Denn crack und smack coom scotterin shots
Troo vindow und troo door,
Boot bang and clang de Germans gife
Anoder volley more.
"Dere let 'em shlide. Right file to shoorsh!"
Aloudt de orders ran.
"I kess I paid dem for dat shot,"
Shpeak grim der Breitemann.
All rosen red de mornin fair
Shone gaily o'er de hill,
A violet plue de shky crew teep
In rifer, pond, und rill;
All cloudy grey de limeshtone rocks
Coom oop troo dimmerin wood;
All shnowy vite in mornin light
De shoorsh pefore dem shtood.
"Now loudet vell de organ, oop,
To drill mit solemn fear;
Und ring also dat Lumpenglock
To pring de beoples here.
Und if it prings guerillas down,
Ve'll gife dem, py de Lord,
De lowmass of de sabre, and
De highmass of de cord.[20]
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 50
Page No 54
"Du, Eberle aus Freiburg,
Du bist ein Musikant,
Topsawyer on de counterpoint
Und buster in discant,
To dee de soul of musik
All innerly ish known,
Du canst mit might fullenden
De art of orgelton.
"Derefore, a Miserere
Vill dou, beghostet, spiel,
Und vake beraised, yearnin,
Also a holy feel:
Pe referent, men rememper
Dis ish a Gotteshaus
Du Conrad go along de aisles
Und schenk de whiskey aus!:
Dey blay crate dings from Mozart,
Beethoven, und Mehul
Mit chorals of Sebastian Bach
Soopline und peaudiful.
Der Breitmann feel like holy saints,
De tears roon down his fuss;
Und he sopped out, "got verdammich dis
Ist wahres Kunstgenuss!"[21]
Der Eberle blayed oop so high,
He maket de rafters ring;
Der Eberle blayed lower, und
Ve heardt der Breitmann sing
Like a dronin wind in piney woods
Like a nightly moanin sea:
Ash de dinked on Sonntags long agone
Vhen a poy in Germany.
Und louder und mit louder tone
High oop de orgel blowed,
Und plentifuller efer yet
Around de whiskey goed.
Dey singed ash if mit singin, dey
Might indo Himmel win:
I dink in all dis land soosh shprees
Ash yet hafe nefer peen.
Vhen in de Abendsonnenschein,
Mit doostclouds troo de door,
All plack ash night in golden lighdt
Der shtood ein schwartzer Mohr,
Dat contrapand so wild und weh,
Mit eyepalls glaring roun,
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BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 51
Page No 55
Who cried "For Gott's sake, hoory oop!
De reps ish gomin down!"
Und while he yet was shpeakin,
A faroff soundt pegan,
Down rollin from de moundain
Of many a ridersmann.
Und vhile de waves of musik
Vere rollin o'er deir heads,
Dey heard a foice a schkreemin,
"Pile out of thar, you Feds!
"For we uns ar' a comin
For to guv to you uns fits,
And knock you into brimstun
And blast you all to bits"
Boot ere it done ids shpeakin,
Der vas order in de band,
Ash Breitmann, mit an awfool stim
Outdondered his gommand.
Und ash fischhawk at a mackarel
Doth make a splurgin flung,
Und ash eagles dab de fishhawks
Ash if de gods vere young,
So from all de doors and vindows,
Like shpiders down deir webs
De Dootch went at deir horses,
Und de horses at de rebs.
Crate shplendors of de treadful
Vere in dat pattle rush,
Crate vights mit swords und carpine,
Py efery fence and bush.
Ash panters vight mit crislies
In famished morder fits
For de rebs vere mad ash boison,
Und de Dootch vere droonk ash blitz.
Yet vild ash vas de pattle,
So quickly vas it o'er,
O, vhy moost I forefer
Pestain mine page mit gore?
Py liddle und py liddle
Dey drawed demselfs afay,
Oft toornin' round to vighten
Like boofaloes at bay.
De scatterin shots grew fewer,
De scatterin gries more shlow,
Und furder troo de forest
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BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 52
Page No 56
Ve heard dem vainter grow.
Ve gife von shout "Victoria!"
Und denn der Breitmann said,
Ash he wiped his ploody sabre:
"Now, poys, count oop your dead!"
Oh small had been our shoutin
For shoy, if ve had known
Dat der Stossenheim im oaken wald,
Lay dyin all alone.
Vhile his oldt vhite horse mit droopin het
Look dumbly on him doun,
Ash if he dinked, "Vy lyest dou here
Vhile fightin's goin on?"
Und dreams coom o'er de soldier
Slow dyin on de eart;
Of a schloss afar in Baden,
Of his mutter, und nople birt!
Of poverty and sorrow,
Vhich drofe him like de wind,
Und he sighed, "Ach weh for de lofed ones,
Who wait so far pehind!"
"Wohl auf, my soul o'er de moundains!
Wohl auf well ofer de sea!
Dere's a frau dat sits in de Odenwald
Und shpins, und dinks of me.
Dere's a shild ash blays in de greenin grass,
Und sings a liddle hymn,
Und learns to shpeak a fader's name
Dat she nefer will shpeak to him.
"But mordal life ends shortly
Und Heafen's life is long:
Wo bist du Breitmann? glaub'es[22]
Gott suffers noding wrong.
Now I die like a Christian soldier,
My head oopon my sword:
In nomine Domini!"
Vas Stossenheim his word.
O, dere vas bitter wailen
Vhen Stossenheim vas found.
Efen from dose dere lyin
Fast dyin on de ground.
Boot time vas short for vaiten,
De shades vere gadderin dim:
Und I nefer shall forget it,
De hour ve puried him.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH. 53
Page No 57
De tramp of horse und soldiers
Vas all de funeral knell;
De ring of sporn und carpine
Vas all de sacrin bell.
Mit hoontin knife und sabre
Dey digged de grave a span,
From German eyes blue gleamin
De holy water ran.
Mit mossgrown shticks und barkthong
De plessed cross ve made,
Und put it vhere de soldier's head
Towards Germany vas laid.
Dat grave is lost mit dead leafs,
De cross is goned afay:
Boot Gott will find der reiter
Oopon de Youngest Day.
Und dinkin of de fightin,
Und dinkin of de dead,
Und dinkin of de organ,
To Nashville, Breitmann led
Boot long dat rough oldt Hanserl
Vas earnsthaft, grim und kalt,
Shtill dinkin o'er de heart's friend,
He'd left im gruenen wald.[23]
De verses of dis boem
In Heidelberg I write;
De night is dark around me,
De shtars apove are bright.
Studenten in den Gassen[24]
Make singen many a song;
Ach Faderland! wie bist du weit!
Ach Zeit! wie bist du lang![25]
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26]
VONCE oopon a dimes, goot vhile afder der var vas ofer, der Herr
Breitmann vent oud Vest, drafellin' apout like efery dings
"circuivit terram et perambulavit eam," ash der Teufel said ven
dey ask him: "How vash you und how you has peen?"
Von efenings he vas drafel mit some ladies und shendlemans, und he
shtaid incognitus. Und dey singed songs, dill py und py one of
de ladies say: "Ish any podies here ash know de crate pallad of Hans
Breitmann's Barty?" Den Hans say: "Ecce Gallus! I am dat
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26] 54
Page No 58
rooster!" Den der Hans dook a trink und a letbencil und a biece of
baper, und goes indo himself a little dimes und den coomes out again
mit dis boem:
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas:
He drafel fast und far;
He rided shoost drei dousand miles
All in von railroat car.
He knowed foost rate how far he goed
He gounted all de vile,
Dere vash shoost one bottle of champagne,
Dat bopped at efery mile.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
I dell you vot, my poy,
You bet dey hat a pully dimes
In crossin' Illinoy.
Dey speaked deir speaks to all de folk
A shtandin' in de car;
Den ask dem in to dake a trink,
Und corned em gans und gar.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
By shings! dey did it prown.
When he got into Leafenvort,
He found himself in town.
Dey dined him at de Blanter's House,
More goot as man could dink;
Mit efery dings on eart' to eat,
Und dwice as mooch to trink.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
He vent it on de loud.
At Ellsvort, in de prairie land,
He foundt a pully crowd.
He looked for bleedin' Kansas,
But dat's "blayed out," dey say;
De vhiskey keg's de only ding
Dat's bleedin' dere today.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas,
To see vot he could hear.
He foundt soom Deutschers dat exisdt
Py makin' lager beer.
Says he: "Wie gehts du Alt Gesell?"
But nodings could be heard;
Dey'd growed so fat in Kansas
Dat dey couldn't speak a vord.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
Py shings! I dell you vot,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26] 55
Page No 59
Von day he met a crisly bear
Dat rooshed him down, bei Gott!
Boot der Breitmann took und bind der bear
Und bleased him fery much
For efery vordt der crisly growled
Vas goot Bavarian Dutch!
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas!
By donder dat is so!
He ridet oout upon de blains
To shase de boofalo.
He fired his rifle at de bools,
Und gallop droo de shmoke,
Und shoomp de canyons shoost as if
Der teufel vas a choke!
It's hey de trail to Santa Fe;
It's ho! agross de plain;
It's lope along de Denver road,
Until ve toorn again.
Und de railroad drafel after us
Apout as quick as ve;
Dis Kansas ish de fastest land
Ash efer I did see.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
He have a pully dime;
But 'twas in old Missouri
Dat dey rooshed him up subline.
Dey took him to der Bilot Nob,
Und all der nobs around;
Dey shpreed him und dey tea'd him
Dill dey roon him to de ground.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas,
Und made his carpine pop!
Ven he shooted at a drifer man
To make de wagon shdop.
A noble Tribune shendleman
Shoost dodged dat pullet's bore,
Und de driver shwore dat soosh a crowd
He nefer druv pefore.
Hans Breitmann vent to Kansas;
Droo all dis earthly land,
A vorkin' out life's mission here
Soobyectifly und grand.
Some beoplesh runs de beautiful,
Some vorks philosophie;
Der Breitmann solfe de infinide
Ash von eternal shpree!
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26] 56
Page No 60
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS.
"Haec est illa bona dies
Et vocata laeta quies
Vina sitientibus.
"Nullus metus, nec labores,
Nulla cura, nec dolores,
Sint in hoc symposio."
[De Generibus Ebriosorum, Francoforti
ad Moenum, A.D. 1585.
ID vas on Weihnachtsabend Vot Ghristmas Efe dey call
Der Breitmann mit his Breitmen tid rent de Musik Hall;
Ash de Breitmen und die vomen who vere in de Liederkranz
Vouldt blend deir souls in harmonie to have a bleasin tantz.
Dey reefed de Hall 'mid pushes so nople to pe seen,
Aroundt Beethoven's buster dey dey ondid a garlandt creen:
De laties vork like teufels dwo tays to scroob de vloor
Und hanged a crate serenity mit WILLKOMM! oop de toor!
Und vhile dere vas a Schweinblatt whose redakteur tid say,
Die Breitmann he vas liederlich: ve antworded disa way,
Ve maked anoder serenity mid ledders plue und red:
"Our Leader lick de repels! N.G." (enof gesaid.)
Und anoder serene dransbarency ve make de veller baint,
Boot de vay he potch und vertyfeled id, vas enof to shvear a saint,
For ve vanted LA GERMANIA; boot der ardist mit a bloonder,
Vent und vlorished LAGER agross id und denn poot MANIA oonder!
"Now ve moost pe guestfriendlich," said Breitmann, said he;
"Und shoot te toor vide oben, for beople all to see.
Four elemends indernally unided make a punsch;
Boot id dakes a tausend fellers vhen you gifes dem freie lunsch."
Und as Ghristmas Efe vas gekommen, de beoplesh weren im Hall;
I shvears you id vas Gottfull dat shplendit, peglory'd ball;
Ve hat foon wie der Teufel in Frankreich ve coot oop
like der teufel in France,
Und valk pairwise in, vhile de musik blayed loudt de FackelTanz.
Boot vhen de valtz shtrike oopwart ve most went out of fits,
Ash der Breitmann led off on a dwister mit de lofely
Helmine Schmitz.
The Breitmann Ballads
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS. 57
Page No 61
He valtz yoost like he vas shtandin' shtill mit a
peaudiful solemn shmile,
Und Helmine say he nefer shtop poussiren alla weil.
"Es toent, es rauschet Saitenklang I hear de musik call
Den herzenhellen Saal entlang all droo de gleamin' Hall.
O moecht ich schweben stolz und froh O mighdt I efer pe
Mit dir durchs ganze Leben so! mine Lebanlang py dee!"
Und vaster blay de musik de Wellen und Wogen von Strauss;
Und soom drop indo de tantzen, und soom of dem drop aus;
Und soon like a shtorm in de Meere I veel de reelin' vloor,
So de shpinners shtop mit de shpinsters, for dey couldn't
shpin no more.
Now weren ve all frolic, und lauter guter ding,
Und dirsty ash a brooshpinder vhen ve hear some glasses ring;
Foors mild und sonft in de distants like de song of
a nightingall,
Denn a ringin' und rottlin und clotterin' ash de Gluck
of Edenhall?
Hei! how ve roosh on de liquor! hei: how de kellners coom:
Hei! how ve busted de bierkegs und poonished de Punsch a la Rhum.
Like lonely wafes at mitternight oopon some shiant shore
Like an awful shtorm in de Waelder vas de dirsty Deutschers' roar!
I pyed some carts for a dime abiece I pyed shoost fifdydwo,
Dey vere goot for bier, or schnapps, or wein by
doonder how dey flew!
I ring de deck on de vaiters for liquor hot und cool,
Und efery dime I blays a cart, py shings, I rake de pool![27]
Und ash ve trinked so comforble, like boogs in any roog,
De trompets blowed tan da ra dei, und dere come in a Maskenzug,
A peaudiful brocession, soulraisin' and sooplime,
De marmorbilds of de heroes of de early Sharman dime.
Dere vent der gros Arminius, mit his frau Thusnelda, doo,
De vellers ash lam de Romans dill dey roon mit noses plue;
Denn vollowed Quinctilius Varus who carry a Roman yoke,
Und arm in arm mit Gambrinus coom der Allemane Chroc.
Der Alte Friedrich Rothbart, und Kaiser Karl der crate,
Mit Roland und Uliverus vent shveepin' on in shtate;
Und Conradin, whose sadfull deat' shtill makes our heartsen pleed,
Und all ov dem oldt vellers aus dem Nibelungen Lied.
Und as dey mofed on, der Breitmann maked a tyfeled shplendid witz
In antiword to dis quesdion from de lofely Mina Schmitz:
"Vhy ish id dey always makes in shtone dem vellers so andiquadet?"
The Breitmann Ballads
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS. 58
Page No 62
"Vhy dey set in de laps of Ages dill dey got lapidated!"
Und shoost as de last of dis hisdory hat fanished droo de door,
Ve heardt a gescreech, and Pelz Nickel coom howlin' on de vloor;
Denn de laties yell like der teufel, und vly like gulls mit wings,
Und der Pelz Nickel lick em mit svitches, und ve
laugh like eferydings.
I nefer hafe sooch laughen before dat I vas geborn;
Und Pelz Nickel, vhen 'tvas ober, he plow on a yaeger horn,
Und denounce do all de beople gesembled in de hall:
"Dat a Ghristmas dree vas vaiten', mit bresents for oos all!"
So ve vollowed him into de zimmer so quick ash dese vords he said,
To kit dem peaudiful bresents, all gratis und on de dead;
Und in facdt a shplendid Weihnachtsbaum mit lighds ve druly vound,
Und liddel kifts dat gekostet a benny abiece all round!
Dere vas Rike Strange die Dessauerinn a maedchen
shtraigdt und tall,
She cot a bicture of Cubid boot she tidn't see it ad all,
Dill der Breitmann say, mit his shplendid shtyle dat
all de laties dake:
"Dat pend of de bow ish de Crecian pend dat you so ofden make!"
Anoder scharmante laity, Maria Top, did cot,
A schwingin' mit a ribbon, a liddle benny pot;
Boot Breitmann hafe id de roughest of any oder mans,
For he kit a yellow gratle mit a liddle vooden Hans.
Denn next Beethoven's Sinfonie, die orkester tid blay;
Adagio allegro andante cantabile.
Ve sat in shtill commotion so dat a bin mighdt drops,
Und de deers roon town der Breitmann's sheeks,
mitwhiles he was trinkin' schnapps.
Next dings ve had de Weinnachtstraum gesung by de Liederkranz,
Denn I trinked dwelf schoppens of gleewine to sed
me oop for a tantz;
Dis dimes I tanz wie der Teufel we shriek de volk on de vloor;
Und boost right indo de sooper room vor ve tanzt a
hole droo de door!
Denn 'twas rowdy tow und hopsassa, ve hollered,
Mann und Weib;
"Rip Sam und sed her oop acain! ve're all of de Shackdaw tribe!"
Vhen Pelz Nickel plow his tromp vonce more, und
peg oos to shtop our din,
Und droo de oben door dere coomed nine denpins marchin' in.
Nine vellers tressed like denpins dey goed to de end' der hall.
The Breitmann Ballads
HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS. 59
Page No 63
Und dwo Hans Wurst, shackpuddin' glowns dey
rolled at em mit a ball.
De balls vas paintet peaudiful; dey was vifdeen feet aroundt;
Und de rule ov de came: "whoefer cot hidt, moost
doomple on de croundt."
Sometimes dey hit de denpins sometimes de oder volk
Und pooty soon de gompany vas all laid out in shoke;
Boot I dells you vot, it maked oos laugh dill we bynearly shplits,
Vhen der Breitmann he roll ofer, und drip oop de Mina Schmitz.
Dis lets itself in Sharman pe foostrade wordblayed on,
Und 'mongst oos begifted vellers you pet dat id vas tone!
How der Breitmann mighdt drafel ash brideman on
de roadt dat ish breit und krumm:[28]
Here de drumpets soundt, and pairwise ve goed for de sooperroom.
Ve goed for geroasted Welshhens, ve goed for gespickter hare,
Ve goed for kartoffel salade mit butter brod,kaviar:
Ve roosh at de lordtly sauerkraut und de wurst which lofely shine,
Und oh, mein Gott im Kimmel! how we goed for de Moselwein!
Und troonker more, und troonker yet, und troonker shtill cot ve,
In rosy lighdt shtill drivin on agross a fairy sea;
Denn madder, vilder, franticer, I proked a salat dish!
Und shoost like roarin' elefants ve tantzed aroundt de tish.
I'fe shvimmed in heafenly droonks pefore boot nefer von like dis;
De morgenhetache only seemt a bortion of de pliss.
De vhile in trilling peauty roundt like heafenly vindharps rang
A goosh of goldnen melodie de Rheinweinbechers' Klang.
De meltin' minnesingers' song a droonk of honey'd rhyme
De b'wildrindipsy Bardic shants of Teutoburgic dime;
Back to de runic dim Valhall und Balder's foamin' mead:
Here ents in heller glorie schein des Breitmann's Weihnachtslied!
BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN
DER SCHWACKENHAMMER coom to down,
Pefore de Fall vas past,
Und by der Breitmann drawed he in
Ash dreimals honored gast.
"Led's see de sighdts! In self und worldt,
Dere's 'sighdts' for him, to see,
Who Selbstanschauungsvermogen hat,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
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BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN 60
Page No 64
Dey vented to de Opera Haus,
Und dere dey vound em blayin',
Of Offenbach (der open brook),
His show spiel Belle Helene.
"Dere's Offenbach, Sebastian Bach,
Mit Kaulbach, dat makes dree:
I alvays like sooch brooks ash dese;"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to de Bibliothek,
Vhich Mishder Astor bilt:
Some pooks vere only en broschure,
Und some vere pound und gilt.
"Dat makes de gold dat makes de sinn,
Mit pooks, ash men, ve see,
De pest tressed vellers guilt de most:"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to see an edidor,
Who'd shanged his flag und doon,
Und crowed oopon der oder side,
Dat very afdernoon.
"De anciends vorshipped wettercocks,
To wetter fanes pent de knee;
Pow down, mein Schwackenhammer, pow!"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented by a panker's hause,
Und Schwackenhammer shvore,
He only vant a pig red shield
Hoong oop pefore de toor;
One side of red, one side of gold,
Like de knighds in hisdorie
"De schildern of dat schild is rich,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent oonto a bicture sale.
Of frames wort' many a cent,
De broperty of a shendleman,
Who oonto Europe vent.
"Don't gry he'll soon pe pack again
Mit anoder gallerie:
He sells dem oud dwelf dimes a year,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to dis berson's house,
To see his furnidure,
Sold oud at aucdion rite afay,
Beremdory und sure.
"He geeps six houses all at vonce,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN 61
Page No 65
Each veek a sale dere pe,
Gotts! vot a dime his vife moost hafe!"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to vind a goot cigar,
Long dimes dey roamed apout,
Von veller had a pran new sort,
De fery latest out
"Mein freund I dinks you errs yourself
De shmell ish oldt to me;
Dat Infamias Stinkadores brand,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to de virst hotel,
De prandy make dem creep,
A trop of id's enough to make
A brazen monkey veep.
"Dey say a viner house ash dis,
Vill soon gebildet pe,
Crate Gott! vot can dey mean to trink?"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented droo de Irish shtreeds,
Dey saw vrom haus to haus,
Und gountet oop, 'pout more or less,
Vive hoondred awful rows.
"If all dese liddle vights dey waste,
Could von crate pattle pe,
Gotts! how de Fenian funds vouldt rise!"
Said Breitmann, said he.
Dey vent to see de Ridualisds,
Who vorship Gott mit vlowers,
In hobes he'll lofe dem pack again,
In winter among de showers.
"Vhen de Pacific railroat's done,
Dis dings imbrofed vill pe,
De josssticks vill pe santal vood,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to hear a breecher of
De last sensadion shtyle,
'Twas 'nough to make der teufel weep
To see his "awful shmile."
"Vot bities dat der Fechter ne'er
Vas in Theologie,
Dey'd make him pishop in his shoorsh,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent indo a shpordin' crib,
De rowdies cloostered dick,
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BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN 62
Page No 66
Dey ashk him dell dem vot o'glock,
Und dat infernal quick.
Der Breitmann draw'd his 'volver oud,
Ash gool ash gool couldt pe,
"Id's shoost a goin' to shdrike six,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent polid'gal meedins next
Dey hear dem rant and rail,
Der bresident vas a forger,
Shoost bardoned oud of jail.
He does it oud of cratitood,
To dem who set him vree:
"Id's Harmonie of Inderesds,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vent to a clairfoyand witch,
A plackeyed handsome maid,
She wahrsagt all deir vortunes denn
"Fife dollars, gents!" she said.
"Dese vitches are nod of dis eart',
Und yed are on id, I see,
Der Shakesbeare knew de preed right vell,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to a restaurand,
Der vaiter coot a dash;
He garfed a shicken in a vink,
Und serfed id at a vlash.
"Dat shap knows vell shoost how to coot
Und roon mit poulderie,
He vas copitain oonder Turchin vonce,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented to de Voman's Righds,
Vhere laties all agrees,
De gals should all pe voters,
Und deir beaux all de votees.
"For efery man dat nefer vorks,
Von frau should vranchised pe:
Dat ish de vay I solfe dis ding,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Dey vented oop, dey vented down,
'Tvas like a roarin' rifer,
De sighds vere here de sighds vere dere
Und de vorldt vent on forefer.
"De more ve trinks, de more ve sees,
Dis vorldt a derwisch pe;
Das Werden's all von whirling droonk,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN 63
Page No 67
BREITMANN IN POLITICS.
I.
I.THE NOMINATION
VHEN ash de var vas ober, und Beace her shnowwice vings
Vas vafin' o'er de coondry (in shpodts) like efery dings
Und heroes vere revardtet, de beople all pegan
To say 'tvas shame dat nodings vas done for Breitemann.
No man wised how id vas shtartet, or vhere de fore shlog came,
Boot dey shveared it vas a cinder, dereto a purnin' shame:
"Dere is Schnitzerl in de GustomHouse potzblitz!
can dis dings be!
Und Breitemann he hafe nodings: vot sighds is dis to see!
"Nod de virst ret cendt for Breitmann! ish dis do pe de gry
On de man dat sacked de repels und trinked dem high und dry?
By meine Seel' I shvears id, und vhat's more I deglares id's drue,
He vonce gleaned oudt a down in half an our, und
shtripped id strumpf und shoe.
"Vhen dey ploondered de down of Huntsville, I dells
you vot, py tam!
He burned oop four bianofords and a harp to roast a ham;
Vhen he found de rouge und email de Paris, which de
laties hafe hid in a shpot,
He whited his horse all ofer und denn pinked his ears, bei Gott!
"Vhen he found dat a blace was ploonderfool, he
alvays tell dem, sure:
'Men, sack und pack! I shoots mine eyes for only shoost an uhr.'
Boot if de blace vas fery rich, he vouldt say mit a solemn mien:
'Men I only shleep for von half uhr more ve moost
hafe tiscipline.'
"He vas shoost like Koenig Etzel, of whom de shdory dell,
Der Hun who go for de Romans und gife dem shinin hell:
Only dis dat dey say no grass vouldt crow vhere
Etzel's horse had trot.
Und I really peliefe vhere Breitmann go, de hops
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BREITMANN IN POLITICS. 64
Page No 68
shpring oop, bei Gott!"
If once you tie a dog loose, dere ish more soon geds aroundt,
Und vhen dis vas shtartedt on Breitmann id was
rings aroom befoundt;
Dough vhy he moost hafe somedings vas nod by no means glear,
Nor tid id, like Paulus' confersion, on de snap to all abbear!
Und, in facdt, Balthazar Bumchen saidt he couldtent
nicht blainly see
Vhy a feller for gaddrin' riches shood dus revartedt pe:
Der Breitmann own drei Houser, mit a weinhandle in a stohr,
Dazu ein LagerWirthschaft, und sonst was somedings more.
Dis plasted plackguard nonesense ve couldn't no means shtand
From a narrowmineted shvine's kopf, of our nople captain grand:
Soosh low, goarse, betty bornirtheit a shentleman deplores;
So ve called him verfluchter Hundsfott, und shmysed
him out of toors.
So ve all dissolfed dat Breitmann shouldt hafe a nomination
To go to de Legisladoor, to make some dings off de nation;
Mit de helb of a Connedigut man, in whom ve hafe great hobes,
Who hat shange his boledics fivdeen dimes, und
derefore knew de robes.
2. THE COMMITTEE OF INSTRUCTION.
Denn for our Insdructions Comedy de ding vas protocollirt,
By Docktor Emsig Grubler, who in Jena vonce studiret;
Und for Breitmann his insdrugtions de comedy tid say
Dat de All outgoing from de Ones vash die first Moral Idee.
Und de segondt crate Moral Idee dat into him ve rings,
Vas dat government for every man moost alfays do efery dings;
Und die next Idee do vitch his mindt esbecially ve gall,
Is to do mitout a Bresident und no government ad all.
Und die fourt' Idee ve vish der Hans vouldt alfays keeb in fiew,
Ish to cooldifate die Peaudifool, likevise de Goot und Drue;
Und de form of dis ooprighthood in proctise to present,
He must get our liddle pills all bassed, mitout id's
gostin' a cent.[29]
Und die fift' Idee ash learnin' ish de cratest ding on eart',
Und ash Shoopider der Vater to Minerfa gife gebirt'
Ve peg dat Breitmann oonto oos all pooplic tocuments
Vhich he can grap or shteal vill sendt franked mit
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2. THE COMMITTEE OF INSTRUCTION. 65
Page No 69
his gompliments.
Die sechste crate Moral Idee since id fery vell ish known
Dat mind is de resooldt of food, ash der Moleschott has shown,
Und ash mind ish de highest form of Gott, as in Fichte dot' abbear
He moost alfays go mit de barty dat go for lagerbier.
Now ash all dese insdrugdions vere showed to Mishder Twine,
De Yangee boledician, he say dey vere fery fine:
Dey vere pesser ash goot, und almosdt nice a tarnal tall concern;
Boot dey hafe some liddle trawbacks, und in fagdt
weren't worth a dern.
Boot yet, mit our bermission, if de shentlemans allow
Here all der Sharmans in de room dake off deir hats und pow
He vouldt gife our honored gandidate some nodions of his own,
Hafing managed some elegdions mit sookcess, as vell vas known.
Let him plow id all his own vay, he'd pet as sure as born,
Dat our mann vouldt not coom oud of der liddle endt der horn,
Mit his goot proad Sharman shoulders dis maket
oos laugh, py shink!
So de comedy shtart for Breitmann's Nota bene after a trink!
3. MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE."
Dere in his crate corved oaken shtuhl der Breitemann sot he:
He lookt shoost like de shiant in de Kinder hishdorie:
Und pefore him, on de tische, was vhere man alfays foundt it
Dwelf inches of good lager, mit a Boemisch glass around it.
De foorst vordt dat der Breitmann spoke he maked no sbeech or sign!
De nexd remark vas "Zapfet aus!" de dird vas, "Schenket ein!"
Vhen in commed liddle Gottlieb und Trina mit a shtock
Of allerbest Markgraefler wein dazu dwelf glaeser Bock.
Denn Mishder Twine deglare dat he vas happy to denounce
Dat as Coptain Breitmann suited oos egsockdly do an ounce,
He vas ged de nomination, and need nod more eckshblain:
Der Breitmann dink in silence, and denn roar aloudt, CHAMPAGNE!
Denn Mishder Twine, while drinkin' wein, mitwhiles
vent on do say,
Dat long instruckdions in dis age vere nod de dime of tay;
Und de only ding der Breitmann need to pe of any use
Vas shoost to dell to efery man he's soundt oopon der coose.
Und ash dis liddle frase berhops vas nod do oos bekannt,
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3. MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE." 66
Page No 70
He dakes de liberdy do make dat ve shall oondershtand,
And vouldt dell a liddle shdory vitch dook blace pefore de wars:
Here der Breitmann nod to Trina, und she bass aroundt cigars.
"Id ish a longe dime, now here, in Bennsylfanien's Shtate,
All in der down of Horrisburg dere rosed a vierce depate,
'Tween vamilies mit cooses, und dose vhere none vere foundt
If cooses might, by common law, go squanderin' aroundt?
"Dose who vere nod pegifted mit cooses, und vere poor,
All shvear de law forbid dis crime, py shings und cerdain sure;
But de cooseholders teklare a coose greadt liberdy tid need,
And to pen dem oop vas gruel, und a mosdt oonChristian teed.
"Und denn anoder barty idself tid soon refeal,
Of arisdograts who kepd no coose, pecause 'twas nod shendeel:
Tey tid not vish de splodderin' keese shouldt on deir
pafemends bass,
So dey shoined de anticoosers, or de oonder lower glass!"
Here Breitmann led his shdeam out: "Dis shdory goes to show
Dat in poledicks, ash lager, virtus in medio.
De drecks ish ad de pottom de skoom floads high inteed;
Boot das bier ish in de mittle, says an goot old Sharman lied.[30]
"Und shoost apout elegdiondimes de scoom und drecks, ve see,
Have a pully Wahlverwandtschaft, or electionsympathie."
"Dis is very vine," says Mishder Twine, "Vot here you indrotuce:
Mit your bermission I'll grack on mit my shdory of de coose.
"A gandertate for sheriff de coosebeholders run
Who shvear de coose de noblest dings vot valk peneat' de sun;
For de cooses safe de Capidol in Rome long dimes ago,
Und Horrisburg need safin' mighty pad, ash all do know.[31]
"Acainsd dis mighdy Cooseman anoder veller rose,
Who keepedt himself ungommon shtill vhen oders came to plows;
Und if any ask how 'twas he shtoodt, his friendts
wouldt vink so loose,
Und vhisper ash dey dapped deir nose: 'He's soundt oopon de coose!
"'He's O.K. oopon de soobject:[32] shoost pet your pile on dat:
On dis bartik'ler quesdion he indends to coot it fat.'
So de veller cot elegded pefore de beople foundt
On vhitch site of der coose it vas he shtick so awful soundt.
"Und efer in America, hencevorwart from dat day,
Ash mit de Native Mericans, de fashion vas to say
Likes well in de Kansas droples de shap who tid not refuse
To go mit beoples ash vanted him, vas soundt oopon der coose.
The Breitmann Ballads
3. MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE." 67
Page No 71
"Dis shdory's all I hafe to dell," says Mishder Hiram Twine;
"Und I advise Herr Breitmann shoost to vight id on dis line."
De volk who of dese boledics would oder shapders read,
Moost waiten for de segondt pardt of dis here Breitmann's Lied.
II.
4.HOW BREITMANN AND SMITH WERE REPORTED TO BE
LOGROLLING
ID hoppinet in de yar of crace, vhen all dese dings pegan,
Dat Mishder Schmit, de shap who rooned acainsd der Breitmann,
Vas a man who look like Mishder Twine so moosh dat beoples say
Dey pliefe dey moost gebrudert pe Gott weiss in vot a vay!
Und id vas also moosh bemarked vhitch look shoost like a bruder
Dat vhen Twine vas vork on any side der Schmit vas on der oder
A fery gommon dodge ish mit de arisdocracie;
So dat votefer cardt doorns op, id's game for de familie!
Nun, goot! Howefer dis might pe, 'tvas cerdain on dis hit
Der Twine vas do his tyfelest to euchre Mishder Schmit;
Und Schmit, I criefe to say, exglaimed: "Gaul darn me for a fool,
But I'll smash old Dutch to cholera fits and rake the
eternal pool!"
So dey cot some liddle ledders, ash brifate ash could pe,
Vhitch Breitmann writed long agone to friendts in Germany;
Und dey brinted dem in efery vay to make de beoples laugh,
Und comment on dem in de shtyle dat "sports" call "slashergaff."
Dereto as vash known py shoodshment und glearly ascertained,
Dat Breitmann hafe lossed money py a valse und schwindlin' friendt
So dey roon it droo de newsbapers, und shbeech to make pegan,
Dat Breitmann shtole de gelt himself und rop de oder man.[33]
Boot de ding dat jam de hardest on de men dat bull de vires,
Und showed that Copitain Breitmann shtood pedween dwo heafy vires,
Vas, pecause he vas a soldier von could see id at a clanse
Dey had pud him in a tisdrigt vhere he hadn't half a shanse.
For ash de pold solidaten ish more prafe ash oder mans,
Dey moost lead de hope verloren und pattle in de vans;
Und ash defeat ish honoraple to men in honor shtrict,
Dey honor dem py puttin' em vhere dey're cerdain to be licked.
Boot dis dimes it shlopped over. 'Tvas de dird or secondt heat,
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4.HOW BREITMANN AND SMITH WERE REPORTED TO BE LOGROLLING 68
Page No 72
Dat a soldier in dis tisdrigt had been poot oop und beat;
So de Plue Goats dink it over und go quietly to vork:
De bow vhen too moosh aufgespannt vlies packward mit a yerk.
Now Mishder Twine deglaret dat de ding seemed doubtenful,
Boot mitout delay he dook de horns so poldly py de bull,
Und shpread de shdory eferyvhere, dill folk to pliefe pecan,
Dat Mishder Schmit had sold de vight unto der Breitemann!
He fix de liddle tedails how moosh der Schmit hafe got
For sellin' out his barty to let Breitmann haul de pot;
Und he showed a brifate letter from Breitemann to Schmit,
Vhere he bromise him for Congress if he shoost let oop a bit.
Der Twine vas writet dis ledder; for der Copitain Breitemann
Vould nefer hafe shtood soosh hoompoogks since virst
his life pegan:
He hat tone some rough dings in de war, in de
ploonderundmorder line,
Boot vas hoockleperrypersimmoned mit dese boledics of Twine.
Howefer, dis ledder vorket foorstrate mit de
Mericans pest of all,
For dey mostly dinked it de naturalest ding as efer couldt pefall;
For to sheat von's own gonstituents ish de pest mofe in de came,
Und dey nefer sooposed a Dootchman hafe de sense to do de same.
5.HOW THEY HELD THE MASS MEETING.
Dere's nodings in dis vorldt so pad, ash all oov us may learn,
Boot may shange from dark to lighthood, if loock
should dake a doorn;
So it hoppinet mit Breitmann, who in spite of sin and Schmit,
Gontrifed ad shoost dis yooncture do make a glucky hit.
Dey hat sendet out some plackarts to de Deutsche burgers all
(N.B. Dish ish not mean blackguards, boot de pills
dey shtick on de vall),
To say dat a Massenversammlung or a meeding of all dem asses
Vouldt be held in de ArbeiterHalle, to consisd of de
Sharman classes.
Now dey gife de brinting of de pills to a new gekommene man,
Who dinked dat Demokratisch vas de same ash Repooblican:
Got im Himmel weiss vhere he'd hid himself on dis
free Coloompian shore
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5.HOW THEY HELD THE MASS MEETING. 69
Page No 73
Dat he scaped de naturalizationisds, und hand't found out pefore.
Boot to dis Deutsche brinter, de only tifference he
Petween Repooplicanish and Demokratisch tid see,
Vas dat von vash dwo ledders longer; so he dook
shoost vot seem pat
To make de poster handsome likewise a liddle fat.
How ofden in dis buzzlin' life shmall grubs grows oop to vings!
How often shoost from moostard seet a virstglass
pusiness shprings!
Van't klein komt men tot't groote, ash de Hollanders hafe said:
Mit dese dwo ledders Breitmann caved in der Schmitsy's head.
6.BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH.
Dis tale dat Schmit hafe sell de vight cot so mooch put apout,
Dat many of his beoples vere in fery tupious toubt;
'Pove all, dose who were on de make, and easy change deir lodge,
Und, pein awfool smart demselfs, pelieve in efery dodge.
Vhen de meeding vas gesempled, und dey found no Schmit vas dere,
Dey looket at von anoder mit a ganz erstaunished air;
But dey saw it glear as taylighd, und around a vink dere ran,
Vhen pefore dem rose de shiant form of Copitain Breitemann!
Denn Breitemann vent los at dem: "He could nichts vell exbress
De rapdure dat besqueezed his hearts de wonnevol hoppiness
To meed in friendtlich council and glasp de hand of dose,
Who had peen mit most oonreason and unkindly galled his foes.
"Berhaps o'er all dis shmilin' eart' he vould say it
dere un denn
Soosh shpecdagles couldt nod pe seen of soosh imbardial men,
So tefoid of base sospicion, so apofe all betty dricks,
Ash to gome und lisden vairly to a voe in poledicks;
"Dat ish to say, a sogalled voe for he feeled id in his soul
Dat de brinciples vitch mofed dem vere de same oopon de whole;
But he lack a vord to exbress dem in manners opportunes"
Here a veller in de gallery gry oud, oonkindly, "Shpoons!"
Und dere der Breitmann goppled him: "If shpoons our modifes pe.
Dere's nod a man pefore oos who lossed a shpoon by me:
Far rader had I gife you all a shpoons to eaten mit,
Und I hope to ged a ladle for mein friendt, der Mishder Schmit."
The Breitmann Ballads
6.BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH. 70
Page No 74
Dis fetch das Haus like doonder it raise der tyfel's dust,
Und for sefenlefen minudes dey ooplouded on a bust;
Und de chaps dat dinked of hedgin' saw a ring as round as O;
So dey boked each oder in de rips und said, "I dold you so!"
For dis d'lusion to de ladle vas as glear ash city milk,
Und drawd it on de beoples so vine ash flossen silk,
Dat Hans und Schmit vere rollin' locks, und de locks
vere ready cut;
Only Breitmann hafe de liddle end, und Schmitsy dake de butt!
Denn Breitmann he crack onward: "If any 'lightened man
Vill seeken in his Bibel, he'll find dat a publican
Is a barty ash sells lager; und de ding is fery blain,
Dat a republican ish von who sells id 'gain und 'gain.
"Now since dat I sells lager, I gant agreen mit
De demprance brinciples I hear dishtriputet to Schmit;
Boot dis I dells you vairly, und no one to teseife
If I were Schmit, I'd pliefen shoost vot der Schmit peliefe.
"And to mine Sharman liperal friendts I might mention in dis shpot,
Dat I hear an oonfoundet rumor dat der Schmit peliefe in Gott;
Und also dat he coes to shoorsh mit a brayerbook
for salfadion:
I vould not for die welt say dings to hoort his repudation.
"Und noding is more likely dat it all a shlander pe,
So also de rumor dat vhen young he shtoody divinidy:
I myself, ash a publican, moost pe a sinner py fate,
Und in dis sense I denounce mineself ash Republicandidate!
"Ash Deutschers say und Yankees doo vhen der
wein ish in der man,
So ish oopon de oder part, de wisehood in de can,
Vhitch brofes dat wein und wisehood ish all de same, py shinks!
Und de only real candidate ish der veller ash coes for trinks:
"Und dat ve may meed in gommon, I deglare here in dis hall
Und I shvears mineself to holt to it, votefer may pefall
Dat any man who gifes me his fote votefer his boledics pe
Shall alfays pe regartet ash bolidigal friendt py me."
(Dis voonderfol Condescension pring down drementous applause,
Und dose who catch de nodion gife most derriple hooraws:
Eshbecially some Amerigans ash vas shtandin' near de door,
Und who in all deir leben long nefer heard so moosh sense pefore.)
"Dese ish de brinciples I holts, and dose in vitch I run:
Dey ish fixed firm und immutaple ash de course of de 'ternal sun:
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6.BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH. 71
Page No 75
Boot if you ton't approve of dem blease nodice vot I say
I shall only pe too happy to alder dem right afay.
"Und undo my Demogratic friendts I vould fery glearly shtate
Since dis useless mit oopgecleared minds to hold a long depate
Dat dere's no man in de cidy who sells besser liquor ash I,
Und I shtand de treadts freegradis vhenefer mine friendts ish try.
"Ad finem in de ende I moost mendion do you all,
Dat a dootzen parrels of lager bier ish agomin' to dis hall:
Dere ish none of mine own barty here, bot we'll do
mitout deir helfs;
Und I kess, on de whole, 'twill pe shoost so goot if ve
trink it all ourselfs."
Soosh drementous uploudation pefore vas nefer seen,
Ash dey svored dat der Copitain Breitmann vas a
brickpat, und no sardine;[34]
Und dey trinked demselfs besoffen, sayin', "Hobe you
wird sookceed!"
De nexter theil will pe de ent of dis historisch lied.
III.
PARDT DE VIRST.
THE AUTHOR ASSERTS THE VAST INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY OF
GERMANS TO AMERICANS.
DERE'S a liddle fact in hishdory vitch few hafe oondershtand,
Deutschers are, de jure, de owners of dis land,
Und I brides mineslf oonshpeakbarly dat I foorst make beknown,
De primordial cause dat Columbus vas derivet from Cologne.
For ash his name vas Colon, it fisiply does shine,
Dat his Eldern are geboren been in Cologne on der Rhein,
Und Colonia peing a colony, it sehr bemerkbar ist,
Dat Columbus in America was der firster colonist.
Und ash Columbus ish a tove, id ish wort' de drople to mark,
Dat an bidgeon foorst tiscofer land avlyin' from de ark;
Und shtill wider in de peginnin', mitout de leastest toubt,
A tofe vas vly ofer de wassers und pring de vorldt herout.
Ash mein goot oldt teacher der Kreutzer to me tid ofden shbeak,
De mythus of name rebeats itself vhitch see in his "Symbolik,"
So also de name America, if we a liddle look,
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THE AUTHOR ASSERTS THE VAST INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY OF GERMANS TO AMERICANS. 72
Page No 76
Vas coom from der oldt king Emerich in de Deutsche Heldenbuch.
Und id vas from dat fery Heldenbuch how voonderful it ron,
Dat I shdole de Song of Hildebrand, or der Vater und der Sohn,
Und dishtripude it to Breitemann for a reason vhitch now ish plain,
Dat dis Sagen Cyclus fullendet, pring me round to der Hans again.
Dese laws of unendly unwindoong ish so teep and broad and tall,
Dat nopody boot a Deutscher hafe a het to versteh dem at all,
Und should I write mine dinks all out, I tont peliefe inteed,
Dat I mineslf vould versteh de half of dis here Breitmann's Lied.
Ash der Hegel say of his system dat only von mans knew,
Vot der tyfel id meant und he couldn't tell und der
Jean Paul Richter, too,
Who saidt: "Gott knows I meant somedings vhen
foorst dis buch I writ,
Boot Gott only wise vot das buch means now for I
hafe fergotten it!"
Und all of dis bewises so blain ash de face on your nose,
Dat der Deutscher hafe efen more intellects dan he himself soopose,
Und his tifference mit de overagain vorldt, as I really
do soospect,
Ish dat oder volk hafe more soopose und lesser intellect.
Yet ooprighty I confess it mitout ashkin' vhy or vhence,
Dere ish also dimes vhen Amerigans hafe shown sharppointet sense,
Und a fery outsigned exemple of genius in dis line,
Vas dishblayed in dis elegdion py Mishder Hiram Twine.
PARDT DE SECONDT.
SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35]
Vide licet. Dere vas a fillage whose vote alone vouldt pe
Apout enof to elegdt a man und give a mayority,
So de von who couldt "scoop" dis seddlement vouldt
make a lucky hit,
But dough dey vere Deutschers, von und all, dey all
go von on Schmit.
Now id hoppinet to gome to bass, dat in dis little town,
De Deutsch vas all exshpegdin' dat Mishder Schmit coom down,
His brinciples to foresetzen und his idees to deach
(Id est, fix oop de brifate pargains) und telifer a
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SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35] 73
Page No 77
pooplic shbeech.
Now Twine vas a gyrotwistive cuss ash blainly ish peen shown,
Und vas always an outfindin' votefer might pe known,
Und mit some of his circumswindles he fix de matter so,
Dat he'd pe himself at dis meeding, und see how dings vas go.
Oh shdrangely in dis leben de dings kits vorked apout,
Oh voonderly Fortuna makes doorn us inside out.
Oh sinkular de loockvheel rolls dis liddle meeding dere,
Fixt Twine ad perpendiculum: shoosh suit him to a hair.
Now it hopponet on dis efenin', de Deutschers von und all,
Vere erwaitin' mit oonpatience de onfang of de Ball,
Und de shates of nighdt vere fallin' und de shdars pegin to plink,
Und dey vish dat Schmit vouldt hoory, for 'twas dime
to dake a trink.
Dey hear some hoofs a dramplin' und dey saw und
dinked dey know'd,
De bretty greature coomin' on his horse entlang de road,
Und ash he ride town invard de likeness vas so blain,
Dey donnered out "Hoora for Schmit!" enof to make it rain.
Der Twine vas shdart like plazes boot oop shdardet too his vit,
Und he dinks, "Great turnips! vhot if I couldt bass
for Colonel Schmit!
Gaul darn my heels I'll do it and go the total swine,
Oh soap balls! what a chance!" said dis dissembulatin' Twine.
Denn'twas "Willkomm! willkomm! Mishder Schmit!"
rings aroom on efery site,
Und "Firstrate how dy do, yourself?" der Hiram Twine replied,
Dey ashk him "Coom und dake a trink" boot dey
find id mighdy gueer,
Vhen Twine informed em none boot hogs vould
trink dat shtinkin' bier.
Dat lager vas nodings boot boison, und as for Sharman wein,
He dinks it vas erfounden exbressly for Sharman schwein,
Dat he himself was a demperanceler, dat he gloria in de name,
Und adfised dem all for tecence's sake to go und do de same.
Dese bemarks, among de Deutschers, vere apout as vell receife,
Ash cats in a game of denpins ash you may of coorse peliefe,
De heats of de recebtion vent down a dootzen degrees,
Und in blace of hurraws was only heardt de roostlin' of de drees.
Und so in solemn stille dey scorched him to de hall,
Vhere he maket de crate oradion vhitch vas so moosh
to blease dem all,
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SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35] 74
Page No 78
Und dis vay he pegin it: "Pefore I furder go,
I vish dat my obinions, you puddinhet Dutch, shouldt know.
"Und eher I norate furder, I dink it only fair,
Ve shouldt oonderstand each oder, prezackly, chunk and square;
Dere are points on vitch ve tisagree, und I will plank de facts
I tont go round slanganderin' my friendts pehind deir packs.
"So I beg you dake it easy, if on de raw I touch,
Vhen I say I can't apide de sound of your groonting
shishing Dootch,
Should I in de Legisladure as your slumgullion stand,
I'll have a bill forbidding Dutch, droo all dis 'versal land.
"Should a husband talk it to his frau, to deat' he should pe led,
If a mutter breat' it to her shild, I'd bunch her in de head;
Und I'm sure dat none vill atvocate id's use in pooplic schools,
Oonless dey're peastly, nashdy, prutal, saurkraut eadin' fools."
Here Mishder Twine, to gadder breat', shoost make a liddle pause,
Und see sechs hundert gapin' eyes sechs hundert shdaring' chaws!
Dey shtanden erstarrt like frozen von faindly dried to hiss:
Und von saidt: "Ish id shleeps I'm treamin'
Gottstausend! vhot ish dis?
Twine keptet von eye on de vindow, boot boldly vent ahet,
"Of your oder shtinkin' hobits no vordt needt here pe set;
Shdop goozlin' bier shdop shmokin' bipes shdop rootin'
in de mire,
Und shoost unDutchify yourselfs! dat's all dat I require."
Und denn dere coomed a shindy ash if de shky hat trop:
"Trow him mit ecks, py doonder! go shlog him on de kop!
Hei! shoot him mit a powieknifes! go for him, ganz and gar!
Shoost tar him mit some fedders! led's fedder him mit tar!"
Sooch a teufel's row of furie vas nefer oopkicket pefore,
Some roosh to onclimb de blatform, some hoory
to festen de toor,
Von veller vired his refolfer boot de pullet missed her mark,
She coot de cort of de shandelier it vell und de hall vas tark!
Oh vell vas it for Hiram Twine dat nimply he couldt shoomp!
Und vell dat he light on a misthauf und nefer feel de boomp!
Und vell for him dat his coot cray horse shtood sottelet
shoost outside!
Und vell dat in an augenblick he vas off on a teufel's ride!
Bang! bang! de sharp pistolen shots vent pipin' py his ear,
Boot he tortled oop de barrick road like any moundain deer,
Dey trowed der Hiram Twine mit shteins boot dey
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SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35] 75
Page No 79
only could bemark
Von climpse of his vhite obercoat und a clotterin'
droo de dark.
So dey gesempeled togeder, ein ander to sprechen mit,
Und allow dat soosh a Rede dey nefer exshpegt from Schmit!
Dat he vas a foorstglass plackguard, und so pig a lump ash ran,
So nemine contradicente dey vented for Breitemann.
Und 'twas annerthalb yar dere after before de Schmit vas know,
Vhat maket dis rural fillage go pack oopon him so,
Und he schwored at de Dutch more schlimmer ash
Hiram Twine had done,
Note bene: he tid it in earnest, while der Hiram's vas
pusinessfun.
Boot vhen Breitmann heardt de shtory how de fillage
hat been dricked,
He schwore bei Leib und Leben, dat he'd rader hafe peen licked,
Dan be helpet droo sooch slumgoozlin', und 'twas
petter to pe a schwein,
Dan a schvindlin', honeyfooglin' shnake, like dat lyin'
Yankee Twine.
Und pegot so heavy disgootet mit de boledics of dis land,
Dat his friendts could barely keep him from trowin' oop his hand,
Vhen he held shtraightflush mit an ace in his poot
vitch phrase ish all de same,
In de science of pokerology, ash if he got de game.
So Breitmann cot elegdet, py vollowin' de vay,
Ve manage our elegdions oonto dis fery day.
Dis shows de Deutch Dummehrlichkeit also de Yankee "wit:"
Das ist das abenteuer how Breitmann lick der Schmit.
BREITMANN AS AN UHLAN.
"Bjo foeri ek ther,
Brynthings apaldr!
Magni blandinn
Ok magentiri,
Fullr er hann ljoda."
Sigrdrifurnal
"Beer I bear to thee,
Battle's great appletree!
Mingled with might
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN AS AN UHLAN. 76
Page No 80
And with bright glory,
All full of song."
The Edda.
I. THE VISION.
"Dere vas vonce oopon a dimes a Frantchman who asket if a Sharman
could hafe esprit. Allowin for his pad shbellin, de reater will
find dat der Herr Breitmann was hafe a spree goot many dimes. You
gant ged rount de Dootch." FRITZ SWACKENHAMMER.
GOTTS blitz! blau Feuer, potz bomben Tod!
Vot shimmers in de mitnacht roth?
Like hellshtrom boorst o'er heafen's plain,
Trowin dead light on eart acain:
Ja! wide im nord om Odin shtone
Lies a shiant form im glare alone.
Troonk py de eiskalt roarin shdream
Der Hans ish hafe ein wunder tream.
Troonk om haunted Odinstein
Im Hexenlicht und Elfenschein
Vhere blooty Druids omens trew
From grin und screech of shaps dey slew;
Or vhere der Norseman long of yore
Vas carven eagles on de shore,
As o'er him yell de Valkyr broot
Und crows valk round knee teep im ploot,
Vhile rabens schkreem o'er ruddy bay;
Dere ten pottles troonk Hans Breitmann lay.
Fast und rof der warman shnore
Like de hammershlog of Thor,
Schnell ash Mjollner's bang und beat
Heaved de form from het to veet
Vhile apofe him in de shkies
Dere he saw a glorie rise,
Und im mittle von it all
De iron lords of crate Valhall.
Long he gaze mit wolfen glare
At de Aesir in de air,
Long mit schneerin baren grin
He toorn his nase auf und hin
(For ne'er a Sherman tam de otts
Vas efer yet gife in to Gotts),
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I. THE VISION. 77
Page No 81
Dill avery Aes owned oop dat he
A gottlike man of brass moost pe.
Shtern der Breitmann raise his het,
To his fader Gotts he set:
"Let your worts of wisehood shlip;
Rush your runes, und let 'em rip!
For you de gotts hafe efer pe
Of dose who vere ash gotts to me:
Alt Thor der Thoren here pelow
Vot hell you vants,[36] I'd like to know?"
Antworded ash de donner clangs,
Der fader of de iron bangs:
"De gotts will let de helldogs go,
Und raise damnation here pelow;
Until de sassy Frenchmen schmell
De rifers ten dat roon troo hell
To telle dis I comme dence,
Dou lord of lion impudence.
"Drafeller! I know dee vell!
Breitmann improturbable!
Vhen on eart I hat my shy,
Breitmann of dat age vas I.
I schwear py Thor! so crate und gay,
I smashed de Jotuns in my tay,
Und dou shall pe gewrit sooplime
Ash de crate Thor of deiner time.
"Now ve lets de eagles vly
Skreemin troo de vlamin shky,
Our own specials: dare nod laugh;
For in de London Telegraph,
A voondrous poy vot make oos shdare,
For hop vhat may, he's alvays dere!
Vill dell de worlt, troo blut and flame,
Hans Breitmann ist der Uhlan's name.
"Und all dou e'er on eart has done,
From oop gang oontil settin sun,
Vill pe ash nix I schvear py Thor!
To vat dou'lt do in dieser war;
Plazin roofs und mordered men,
Hell set loose on eart again;
Rush und ride in shtorm und floot,
Cannon roarin, pools of bloot;
Deutschland mad in fool career,
Led py dy Uhlanen speer,
Hell's harfest sheafs of fictorie,
Reaped mit deat's sword und reapt by dee!
The Breitmann Ballads
I. THE VISION. 78
Page No 82
"Ja! On many a dorf und disch,
Dou shalt pring a requisish;[37]
Dwendy dimes de Frantscher men
Hafe sporned dy land in blut acain
All dose dwenty dimes in von,
Py Deutschland shall to France pe done,
Und dwenty dimes in blut and wein
Shalst dou refenge de Palatine.
"Go! mit shpeer und fiery muth!
Go! mit durst for bier und blut!
Go! mit lofe for Vaterland,
Into burning fury fanned:
Towns und henroosts shall hafe shown
Vhere der Uhlan ist peen gone,
Und cocks vill roon und men crow tame
To hear of der Uhlanen name."
Der fision fadet in de shky,
Und hours vent on und time goed py.
Vot heardest dou, Napolium?
De rumpitty, rumpitty, rumpitty poom!
Ven you hear de sound of de droom,
Oh denn you know dat de Dootch hafe coom,
De treadful roarin Dootch, mit de droom
Und de roompitty, pumpitty, poompity pum!
De wild ferocious Dootch on a bum,
Mit cannon roar und pattle hum,
Mit fee und faw on de foe und fum!
Led py de awful Breitemum!
Bitty boom!! BOOM!!
II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON.
WHO vas efer hear soosh voonders,
Holy breest or virshin nonn?
As pefelled de Coptain Breitmann,
Vhen he hoont an airballon.
Der Bizzy[38] und der Dizzy,[39]
Mit lothairingen und Lothair,
Vas nodings to dis Deutscher,
Who vent kitin troo de air.
Id was in yar Nofember,
In eighdeen sefendee,
Der Breitmann vent a prowlin,
By monden light vent he.
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II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON. 79
Page No 83
In fillages deserted
He hear de Uhu moan;
For you alvays hear der Uhu[40]
Vhere der Uhulan ish gone.
Alone allonsed[41] der Uhlan,
Boot nodings could he find
Safe whitey clouds a drivin
In moonshine fore de wind.
Boot ash he see dese cloudins
He bemark dat von vas round,
Und inshtead of goin oopwarts
It kep risin towards de ground.
"Oh, vot ish dis a gomin?
Some planet, py de Lord!
Too boor to life in heafen,
Coom down on eart to poard;
Und pelow it schwing tree engels
Two hevons mit a wench.
Boot, mein Gott! vot sort of engels
Can dose pe, dalkin Fraentsch!
"I hafe read in Eckhartshausen
Dat oop in heafen py tam!
De engels dalk in Sherman,
Und sing Mardin Luther's psalm.
O nein es sind kein engeln
Vot sail so smoofly on,
Das sind verfluchte Franzosen
In einem luftballon!"[42]
Hei! how der Breitman streak it
Ven vonce he kess de trut'!
He spurred id like de wild fire
Of hope in early yout'.
Troo de weingarts like der teufel
Vhen he shase a lawyer's soul;
Down der moundain mit his lanze
Und his wafin banderol.
Down de moundain, o'er de valley,
Troo de village he ish gone;
Dogbarks die out pehind him,
Oders bark ash he come on.
Liddle heedet he deir bellin,
Liddle mind der Hahnen crow;
Liddle hear der Bauern yellin,
Clotter, clodder, on he go.
"Oh, vot ish hoontin foxen,
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II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON. 80
Page No 84
Und vot ish yager pliss,
Und vot ish shasin bison
On de blains, to soosh ash dis?
I hafe dinked dat roonin rebels
Vas de best of eartly fun;
Boot id isn't half so sholly
Ash to go a luftballon."
Und ash id shdill vent onwart,
Shdill onwarts mit der wind,
Der coom a real madness
To catch id, o'er his mind.
Und had'st dou seen him vylin,
Dat wild onfuriate brick,
Dou'st hafe schworn dat Coptain Breitmann
Was pecome balloonatic.
In fain dey trow deir sandbags,
In fain all dings let fall,
De ballon shdill kep a sinkin,
Und id vouldn't rise at all.
Yet de wild wind trife id onwarts,
Onwarts shdill der Breitmann go,
Dill he cotch id py a ropeent
Vot vas hangin town pelow.
Boot vhen it risen oopwarts,
Ash he cling to id, of corse,
Mit de lefter hand he holtet
To de pridle of his horse.
Der horse valk on his hindlegs:
Too schwer to rise vas he;
Mein Gott! vot fix for Breitmann
Of de Uhlan cavallrie!
So he go for seferal stunden
Petween himmel und eart pelow,
Boot der teufel und die engels
Couldn't make der Hans let go.
Dill all at vonce an idee
Coom from his loocky shtar
He led co his horse's pridle
Und glimb oop indo de car.
Und vot you dinks he foundet
Vhen in dat airballon?
A nople Englisch vicomte,
Milord de Robinson;
Und mit him vas a laity,
Mit whom he'd rooned afay,
Whom he indroduce to Breitmann
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II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON. 81
Page No 85
Ash die Jungfer Salome.
Und der dritte was a barson,
Whom Milord, mit prudent view,
Hat took als secretaire,
Likevise for pallast doo.
Dey should hafe bitched him ofer
Vhen de gas was out, dey say;
Boot de dame vould not 'low it:
She'd an arriere pensee.
Sait Milord: "Afar we've wandered,
We are completely brown;
And I'll give a thousand shiners
If you'll take me to a town
Where no one will molest us
Till we find our way to Lon"
Here der Breitmann ent de sentence
Ash he gry out, shortly, "done."
"And as for this fair lady
To whom I would be bound,"
Sait Milord, "we'll have a wedding
Before we reach the ground.
To escape her father's anger
We fled to live in peace,
But she's relatives in London,
And they have the police."
O vas not dis a voonders
To make de Captain shdare?
A tausend pounds in bocket
Und a veddin in de air?
He gafe avay de laity,
Und als sie wieder kam
Zur festen Erde wieder,
Ward sie Robinson Madame.[43]
"O go mit me," said Breitmann,
"O go in mein Quartier!
Don't mind dem gommon soldiers,
For I'm an officier."
He guide dem troo de coontry
Till dey reach de ocean strand;
Now dey sit und pless Hans Breitmann,
In de faroff English land.
Dis ish Breitmann's last adfenture
How troo Himmel air flew he:
Und it's dime, oh nople reader!
For a dime to part from dee.
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II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON. 82
Page No 86
Dou may'st dake it all in earnest
Or pelieve id's only fon;
Boot dere's woonder dings has hoppent
Fery oft in Luftballon.
III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI.
"Tres estime ami, Ick seyn nock nit verdorb,
Vielleickt Sie denck wohl kar, das ick sey tod gestorb,
Ock ne Kott loben Danck, ick leb nock kanss wohl auf.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Naturlich wie Kespenst die off die Kasse keh."
DeutschFranzos, Leipzig, 1736.
Vot roombles down de Bergstrass?
Vot a grash ish in de air!
Mit a desberate gonfusion,
Und a gry of wild tespair,
Das sind gethrasht Franzosen,[44]
Und dose who after flee
Are de terror of Champagner,
Die Uhlan cavallrie.
So liddle say die hoonted,
De hoonters lesser shdill;
Der Frank is ride for's leben,
Der Deutscher rides to kill.
Ofer dicklydoosty faces
Deir eyes like wildkatzs glare;
De blut und iron ridin
Of furie und despair.
Boot of all de wild Uhlanen,
Der Breitmann ride de pest;
For he mark de Frantsch gommanter
Ish most elegandtly tresst.
Und ash he coom down on him,
Dere's a deat' look in his eye:
"Gotts! if I carfe dat toorkey,
How I'll make de stoofin vly!"
Mit a clotter und a flotter
Like a hellsturm dey are on:
Mit a rottle to de pattle
Coom de Deutschers, knockin' down,
Down de moundain to a brucke
Vhy die Frantschmen toorn ad bay?
Oder Deutsch were dere pefore dem,
Und die pridge ish coot avay!
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III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI. 83
Page No 87
Von second der Franzose
Look down mit blitzen eye;
Von second at de brucke,
Den toorn him round to die.
Vhile mit outgepokete lanze,
Like ter teufel shot from hell,
Rode der ploondershtarvin Breitmann
On der graubart Colonel.
Vot for der Coptain Breitmann
Ish shdop in his career?
Vot for he pool his pridle?
Vot for let down his speer?
Vot for his eyes like saucers
Grow pigger, rimmed mit staub?
Vot for his hair, a pristlin,
Lift oop his pickelhaub?[45]
So awfool so oneart'ly,
So treadful was his glare,
So unbeschreiblich gastly,
Dat der Colonel self was shkare.
Oop come der Breitmann ridin,
Und mit gratin force he said:
"Bist du wirkelich lebendig?[46]
Can de grafe gife oop its tead?
"Dou livest yet dou breaf'st yet,
Dough oldter now you pe
Since I mordered you in Strasburg,
Mein freund mon Jean Bouilli.
We lofed de selfe maiden
Wohl forty years agone:
She died to hear I kilt you:
Jean how weiss your beard ish grown!
"I would gife my Hab' und Guter,[47]
Dereto mein bit of life
Couldt I pring dat shild to leben,
Und make her, Jean, dy wife!"
Here der Breitmann boorst out gryin,
Like a liddle prook vept he;
Und dey hugged and gissed einander,
Der Breitmann und Bouilli.
"Ach, de efils dat from efil
Troo a life ish efer grow!
Had I nefer dink I killed you,
Many a man were livin now
Many a man dat shleeps in canebrakes,
The Breitmann Ballads
III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI. 84
Page No 88
Many a man py pillowshore;
For dy morder mate me reckelos,
Und von tead man gries for more!
"O Madchen! schon im Himmel![48]
(Warst schon on eart' difine)
Can'st dink among de Engeln
Of soosh as me und mine?
Den look on soosh a Reue,
Ash eart' has nefer known:
Whereto hast dou a sabre?
Wherefore not kill me, Jean?"
"O, ne pleurez pas, mon Breitmann!
Je trouve cela trop fort,"
Gry der Colonel sehr politely;
"How! you crois dat I was mort!
Mon Dieu! 'Tis but one minute,
As we galloped to this plain,
I thought your spear, mon gaillard,
Would kill me o'er again.
Je vous fais mon compliment,
Your tendresse becomes you well;
Et ne pleurez pas, mon brave,
Pour la petite demoiselle.
I have had a thousand since;
One can always find such game;
Et pour dire la verite,
I have quite forgot her name."
Der Breitmann lok so earnest,
Long and earnest at his foe,
Ash if seein troo his augen
To de forty years ago.
Mit vot a shmile der Breitmann
Toorned roundt und rode away:
Dat was all his parting greetin
To der Colonel Francais.
IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY.
O HEAR a wondrous shdory
Vot soundet like romance,
How Breitmann mit four Uhlans
Vas dake de town of Nantz.
De Frantschmen call it Nancy,[49]
Und dey say its fery hard
Dat Nancy mit her soldiers
The Breitmann Ballads
IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY. 85
Page No 89
Vas getook py gorpral's guard.
Dey dink id vas King Wilhelm
Ash Hans ride in de down,
Und like Odin in his glorie
Gazed derriply aroun'.
Denn mit awfool condesenchen
He at de Frantschmen shtare,
Und say, "Ye wretsched shildren?
Abbortez mir vodre mere!"
Hans mean de city Syndic,
Whom maire de Frantschmen call;
So mit a tousand soldiers
Dey 'scort him to de Hall;
In de shair of shtade dey sot him,
Der maire coom to pe heard,
Und Hans glare at him fife minutes
Pefore he shbeak a word.
Den in iron dones he ootered:
"Ich temand que rentez fous:
Shai dreisig mille soldaten
Bas loin l'ici, barploo!
Aber tonnezmoi Champagner;
Shai an soif exdrortinaire
Apout one douzaine cartloads;
Und dann je fous laisse faire."[50]
Denn he say to Schwackenhammer,
His segretaire "Read
A liddle exdra liste
Of dings de army need,
Und dell dem in Franzosisch
Dey moost shell de neetfool down
In less dan dwendy minudes,
Or, py Gott, I'll purn de town."
"Item one tousand vatches
Of purest gold so fair;
Dazu funf tousand silbern,
For de gommon soldiers' wear;
Und tree dousand diamant ringe
Dey moost make tirectly come,
We need dem for our schweethearts
Ven we write to em at home!
"Von million cigarren
Ve'll accept ash extra boons
For not squeezin dem seferely,
Dazu dwelf tousand shboons."
The Breitmann Ballads
IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY. 86
Page No 90
Here der maire fell down in schwoonin,
Denn all dat he could say
Vas ,"O mon dieu, de dieu, dieu!
Nous voila ruinees!"[51]
No wort der Breitmann ootered,
He only make a sgratch,
Calm and silend on de daple,
Mit a liddle friction match.
De maire versteh de motion,
So went him to de task
Of raisin mong de peoples
Vot it vas der Breitmann ask.
So kam he mit de ringe,
Dey vind dem pooty soon;
So kam he mit de vatches,
Und avery silber spoon.
Boot ash for de champagner,
He wept and loudly call
Dat par dieu! he hadn't any,
For de Deutsch hafe troonk it all.
Ja! de gorporal's guart have trinket
Efery pottle in de down,
Vhile dese negotiations
Oopstairs vere written down.
Boot der Breitmann sooplimely,
Like von who nodings felt,
Said, "Instet of le champagner
Nous brentirons du gelt."[52]
Ja wohl! Donnes cent mille franken,
C'est mir egal, you know;[53]
Pid dem pring id in a horry,
For 'tis dime for oos to go."
Der maire he pring de money,
Und der Breitmann squeeze his hand,
"Leb wohl, dou nople brickbat,
Herzbruder in Frankenland!
"Boot it griefes my soul to larmen,
Und I sympathize mit dein,
To pense of you, mon ami,
Sans le champagner wein.
Dere will oder Deutsch pe gomin,
Und it preak mine heart to dink
De vay dey'll bang and slang you
If dere's no champagne to trink!
"Cela fous fera misere
The Breitmann Ballads
IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY. 87
Page No 91
Que she ne feux bas see;
So, vollow mes gonseilles,
Et brenez mon afis.
Shai, moi, deux mille boutelles,
De meilleur dat man can ashk,[54]
Vich I will gladly sell
Sheap as dirt ten franks a flask."
De maire look oop to heafen,
Wohl nodings could he say,
Vhile oud indo de mitnight
Der Breitmann rode afay.
Away atown de falley,
Till noding more abbears
Boot de glitter of de moonlight,
De moonlight on deir spears.
V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC.
HE sits in bivouacke,
By fire, peneat' de drees;
A pottle of champagner
Held shently on his knees;
His lange Uhlan lanze
Stuck py him in de sand;
Vhile a goot peaspoodin' sausage
Adorn his oder hand.
Und jungere Uhlanen
Sit round mit oben mout'
To hear der Breitmann's shdories
Of fitin in de Sout'
Und he gife dem moral lessons,
How pefore de battle pops:
"Take a liddle brayer to Himmel,
Und a goot long trink of schnapps."
Denn his leutenant bemarket:
"How voonder shdrange it peen
Dat so very many wild pigs
Ish dis year in de Ardennes.
Ash I sout dere donner'r'wetter!
I sah dem coom heraus,
Shoost here und dere an Eber
Mit a hoondert tousand sows.
"Shoost dink of all dese shepicks
Vot flet to neutral land!"
The Breitmann Ballads
V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC. 88
Page No 92
Said Breitmann: "Fery easy
Ish dis to oonderstand:
Dese schweinpicks mit de sauen
Vot you saw aroonin rond,
Ish a crate medempsygosis
Of the Frantsche demimonde.
"I hafe readet in de Bible
How soosh a coterie
Vas getoornet into swinepicks,
Und roon down indo de see;
Boot since de see aint handy,
Or de picks vere all too dumm,
Dey hafe coot across de porder
Und vly to Belgium."
Now ash dey boorst oud laughin,
Und got more liquor out,
Dey hearden from de sendry
A shot und denn a shout.
Und Breitmann crasp his sabre
Quick ash de bullet hiss,
Und leapin out, demantet,
"Herr'r'r'r Gott! vat row ish dis?"
Und bold der Schwabian answert:
"Dis minute on de ground
Dere comed a Frantschman greepin,
On allfours aprowlin round.
I ask him vat he vanted;
Werda! I gry; boot he
Say nodings to my shallenge,
Und only answer 'Oui.'
"So I shoot him like der teufels,
Und I rader dink our friend,
Dis sneakin Franktiroir,
Ish adrawin to his end."
So dey hoonted in de pushes,
Und in avery gorner dig,
Boot, mein Gott! how dey vas laughin,
Ven dey found a mordered pig.
Next week dey hear from Paris,
Und reat in de Gaulois
Of de most adrocious action
De vorlt vas efer saw.
How de Uhlan cannibalen,
Dis vile und awful prood,
Hafe killt a nople Frantschman,
Und cut him oop for food.
The Breitmann Ballads
V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC. 89
Page No 93
"Ja shop him indo sausage,
Und coot him indo ham;
Und schwear dey'll serfe all oders
Exacdly so py tam!
Sons of France, awake to glory,
Let your anciend valor shine!
Und shweep dis Prussian vermin
Het und dails indo de Rhine!"
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY.
For fear of some missed onder standings, I vould shtate, dat dis is
only mean de last Barty dat der Coptain Breitmann has ge given as
yed. Pimepy I kess he gife anoder von, und if I kits an in
leading, or indrotuckshun, I kess I'll go. I am von of de vellers
dat vas ad de virst Barty, vhere mine swisterinlaw de Madilda
Yane vas tantz mit Herr Breitmann.
FRITZ SCHWACKENHAMMER,
Olim Studiosus Theologiae, now Uhlan freelancer,
und Segretarius of Coptain Breitmann.
VOT gollops at mitnight,
Mit h'roolah and yell,
Like der teufel's wild yager
Boorst loose out of hell?
Vot cleams in the sonrise
Bright vlashin in gold?
Das sind die Uhlancers
Of Breitmann der bold.
Dey frighten de coontry,
Dey ploonder de town;
And when dey are oop
Die Franzosen co down:
For pefore de wild Norsemen
De Southron must flee;
Ab ira Normannorum
Libera nos Domine![55]
How dey sweep de chateaux!
How dey grab oop de hens!
Und gobble de toorkeys
Shoot oop in de pens
Like de Angel of Deat'
Dey are ragin abroad:
You may track dem py fedders
The Breitmann Ballads
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY. 90
Page No 94
Kneedeep in de road.
O der Breitmann ish on,
Und der Breitmann is on,
Und mit him de Uhlans
Are ploonderin gone.
De demon of fengeance
His wings o'er em vave,
Mit deir fingers like hooks,
Und mit maws like de grafe.
Dey coom to a castel,
So shplendid, of bricks;
Franzosen defend it,
Das help em gar nichts.
For de Uhlans hafe take it,
Dey smash in de gate,
Und inshpired by Gott's fury,
Dey shdole all de plate.
From shamber to shamber
Dey fighted deir way,
Till dead in de hall
De Franzosen all lay;
Und dere shtood a madchen,
So lieblich und hold,
Who laugh at de dead
Troo her ringlocks of gold.
Denn der Breitmann, all plooty,
To'm madel so lind,
Spoke courtly und tender:
"Vy laughst dou, mein kind?"
Denn de plueeyed young peaudy,
Mit lippe so red,
Said, "Vy not shall I laughen?
Vhen Frenchmen are dead.
"I coom here from Deutschland,
De shildren to teach;
Dey mock me for Deutsch,
Und dey sneer at mein sbeech;
Und since de war komm,
I vas nearly gone mad,
You wouldn't peliefe
How dey dreet me so pad."
Mit a tear Breitmann bend
To de peaudifool miss;
"Crate Gott! can'st dou suffer
Soosh horrors ash dis?"
The Breitmann Ballads
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY. 91
Page No 95
His arm round de maiden
Der hero has bound,
Und it shtaid dere goot vhile,
Fore dey got it unwound.
"Ho! fetch me de diamonds!
Ho! shell out de rings!
Mit all in de castle
Of dat sort of dings."
Twas brought to de Captain
A donderin load:
At de veet of de madchen
Dat ploonder he trowed.
"Ho! pring oos champagner!
Und light oop de hall!
Dis night der Herr Breitmann
Will gife you a ball.
Dat pile of dead vellers,
Vot died for La France,
May see, if dey like,
How de Shermans can tance."
Dey find laties' garments,
Und troot to confess
Likewise som Frantsch maidens,
Who help dem to tress.
De rest of de Uhlans
Who hadn't soosh loves,
Fixed oop in black clothes
Mit white chokers und gloves.
Now hei! for de fittles!
Und hei! for clavier!
For de tantz of de Uhlans
De men of de speer!
How de shendlemen ashk
If dey'd blease introduce;
How de ladies mit beards
Were called Espionnes Prusses!
Hei, ho! how dey tanzet!
Hei, ho! how dey sang!
How mit klingen of glasses
De braun arches rang.
How dey trill from deir hearts
Ash dey pour out der wein,
De songs of de Oberland,
Songs of der Rhein.
Und madder und wilder,
The Breitmann Ballads
VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY. 92
Page No 96
All whirlin around,
Vent Hans mit de maiden
In Bacchanal bound.
She helt to his peard,
Und dey gissed as if mad;
I tont dink dat efer
Vas dimes like dey had.
Boot calm in de hall,
Ever calm on de floor,
Was a row of still guests
Dat wouldn't tantz nefermore.
Mit plood shtreams black winding,
Der lord mit his men,
When der Youngest Day cooms
Hans may meet dem acain.
Hoorah for der Uhlan,
So rash und so wild!
Hoorah for der Uhlan,
Der teufel's own child!
Dis ish "Breitmann's Last Barty,"
Dey'll sing it for years;
De lords of de lanzes,
De sons of de speers.
For dey frighten de coontry,
Dey ploonder de town;
Und when dey are oop
De Franzosen go down;
For pefore de wild Norsemen
Weak Southrons moost flee,
Ab ira Normannorum
Libera nos Domine!
EUROPE.
BREITMANN IN PARIS.
(1869.)
"Recessit in Franciam."
The Breitmann Ballads
EUROPE. 93
Page No 97
"Et affectu pectoris,
Et toto gestu corporis,
Et scholares maxime,
Qui festa colunt optime."
Carmina Burana, 13th century.
DER teufel's los in Bal Mabille,
Dere's hellfire in de air,
De fiddlers can't blay noding else
Boot Orphee aux Enfers:
Vot makes de beoples howl mit shoy?
Da capo Bravo! bis!!
It's a Deutscher aus Amerika:
Hans Breitmann in Paris.
Dere's silber toughts vot might hafe peen,
Dere's golden deeds vot must:
Der Hans ish come to Frankenland
On one eternal bust.
Der same old rowdy Argonaut
Vot hoont de same oldt vleece,
A hafin all de foon dere ish
Der Breitmann in Paris.
Mit a gal on eider shoulder
A holdin py his beard,
He tantz de Cancan, sacrament!
Dill all das Volk vas skeered.
Like a roarin hippopatamos,
Mit a kangarunic shoomp,
Dey feared he'd smash de Catacombs,
Each dime der Breitmann bump.
De pretty liddle cocodettes
Lofe efery dings ish new,
"D'ou vient il donc ce grand M'sieu?
O sacre nom de Dieu!"
In fain dey kicks deir veet on high,
And sky like vlyin geese,
Dey can not kick de hat afay
From Breitmann in Paris.
O vhere vas id der Breitmann life?
Oopon de Rond Point gay,
Vot shdreet lie shoost pehind his house?
La rue de Rabelais.
Aroundt de corner Harper's shtands
Vhere Yankee drinks dey mill,
Vhile shdraight ahet, agross de shdreet,
Der lies de Bal Mabille.
The Breitmann Ballads
EUROPE. 94
Page No 98
Id's all along de Elysees,
Id's oop de Boulevarce,
He's sampled all de weinshops,
Und he's vinked at efery garce.
Dou schveet placksilken Gabrielle,
O let me learn from dee,
If 'tis in lofe or absinthe drunks,
Dat dis wild ghost may pe?
Und dou may'st kneel in Notre Dame,
Und veep away dy sin,
Vhile I go vight at Barriere balls,
Oontil mine poots cave in;
Boot if ve pray, or if ve sin
Vhile nodings ish refuse,
Tis all de same in Paris here,
So long ash l'on s'amuse.
O life, mein dear, at pest or vorst,
Ish boot a vancy ball,
Its cratest shoy a vild gallop,
Vhere madness goferns all.
Und should dey toorn ids gaslight off,
Und nefer leafe a shbark,
Sdill I'd find my vay to Heafen or
Dy lips, lofe, in de dark.
O crown your het mit roses, lofe!
O keep a liddel sprung!
Oonendless wisdom ish but dis:
To go it vhile you're yung!
Und Age vas nefer coom to him,
To him Spring plooms afresh,
Who finds a livin' spirit in
Der Teufel und der Flesh.
BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE.
DER Breitmann sits in la Sorbonne,
A notepook in his hand,
'Tvas dere he vent to lectures,
Und in oldt Louis le Grand.
Id's more ash two und dwendy years
Since here I used mein pen;
Oh, where ish all de characders,
Dat I hafe known since denn?
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE. 95
Page No 99
Der cratest boet efer vas,
Der pest I efer known,
Vent lecdures here, too, shoost like me,
Le Sieur Francoys Villon.
He raise de teufel all arount,
He hear de Sorbonne chime;
Crate shpirid ender in mein heart,
Und mofe mein soul to rhyme.
BALADE.
Dictes moy in what shpirit land
Ish Clara Lafontaine?
Or Pomare, or La Frisette,
Who blazed on soosh a train?
Shveet Echo flings de quesdion pack,
O'er lake or shdreamlet lone;
All eartly peauty fades afay,
Vhere ish dem lofed ones gone?
Oh, vhere ish Lola Montez now,
So loved in efery land?
How oft I shmoked dose cigarettes
She rollt mit vairy hand!
Dat mighdy soul, dat shplendit brick,
A saint's pecome to be,
For mit soosh saints der Breitmann make
His Hagiologie.
Und vhere ish La Pochardinette?
Ish she too mit de dead?
She loafed de Latin Quarter mit
A hat und fedder on her het.
Lebe wohl petite Pochardinette!
Qui ne safait refuser,
Ni la ponche a la bleine ferre,
Ni sa pouche a un paiser.
O Prince! dese quesdions all are nix,
I sit here all alone,
Mit von refrain to end de shdrain,
Vhere ish mein lofed vons gone?
Vhen Marcovitch has cut und run,
Und Schneider's off de ving,
Some cray old reprobate like me
Vill of dese lofed vons sing.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE. 96
Page No 100
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT.
DERE woned once a studente,
All in der Stadt Paris,[56]
Whom jeder der ihn kennte,
Der rowdy Breitmann hiess.
He roosted in de rue La Harpe,
Im Luxembourg Hotel,
'Twas shoost in anno '48,
Dat all dese dings pefel.
Boot he who vouldt go hoontin now
To find dat rue La Harpe,
Moost hafe oongommon shpecdagles,
Und look darnation sharp.
For der Kaisar und his Hausmann
Mit hauses made so vree,
Dere roon shoost now a Bouleverse
Vhere dis shdreet used to pe.
In dis Hotel de Luxembourg,
A vild oldt shdory say,
A shtudent vonce pring home a dame,
Und on de nexter day,
He pooled a ribbon from her neck
Off fell de lady's het;
She'd trafelled from de guillotine,
Und valked de city deadt.
Boot Breitmann nefer cared himself
If dis vas falsch or drue,
I kess he hat mit lifin gals
Pout quite enough to do.
Und Februar vas gomin,
Ganz revolutionnaire,
Und vhere der Teufel had vork on hand,
Der Hans vas alvays dere.
Und darker grew de beople's brows,
No Banquet could dey raise,
So dey shtood und shvore at gorners,
Or dey singed de Marseillaise.
Und here und dere a crashin sound
Like forcin shutters ran,
Und boorstin gunschmidts' vindows in
Hard vorked der Breitemann.
He helped to howl Les Girondins,
To cheer de beople's hearts;
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT. 97
Page No 101
He maket dem bild parricades
Mit garriages und garts.
Vhen a bretty maiden sendinel
Vonce ask de countersign,
He gafe das kind a rousin giss,
Gott hute dir und dein!
Und wilder vent de pattle,
France spread her oriflamme,
Und deeper roared de sturm bell,
De bell of Notre Dame;
Und he who nefer heard it,
O'er shots und cries of fear,
Loud booming like a dragon's roar,
Has someding yet to hear.
Und in de Fauborg Sainte Antoine
Dere comed a fusillade,
Und dyin groans und fallin dead
Vere roundt dat parricade,
But der song of Revolution
From a tousand voices round,
Made a fearful opera gorus
To de deat' gries on de ground.
Und all around dose parricades
Dey raise der teufel dere;
Somedimes dey vork mit pigaxes,
Und somedimes mit gewehr.
Dey maket prifate houses
Gife all deir arms afay,
Und denn oopon de panels
Dey writet Armes donnees.
Und ve saw mid roarin vollies,
Shtreaked like banded settin suns,
Two regiments coome ofer,
Und telifer oop deir guns.
Hei! how de deers vere roonin:
Hei! how dey gryed hurrahs!
For dey saw de vight vas ofer,
Und dey know dey gained deir cause.
Dus spoke deir hearts outboorstin,
In battle by de blade,
From sun to sun mit roarin gun
Und donnerin parricade.
In vain pefore de depudies
De princes tremblin stood,
Vot comes in France too late a day
Cooms shoost in dime for blood.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT. 98
Page No 102
Vhen de Tuileries vas daken,
Amid de scotterin shot,
Und vlyin stones, und howlin,
Und curses vild und hot,
'Tvas dere Hans clobbed his musket,
Und dere de man vas first
To roosh into de palace,
Ven de toors vere ingeburst.
Some vellers burn de guarthaus,
Some trink des Konigs wein;
Some fill deir hats mit rasbry sham,
Und prandy beeches fein.
Hans Breitmann in de gitchen
Vas shdare like avery ding,
To see vot lots of victualdedees
Id dakes to feed a king.
Und oder volk, like plackguarts,
Vent dook de goaches out;
Und burnin dem, dey rolled dem
Afay mit yell und shout.
Der Breitmann in der barlor,
Help writen rapidly,
La liberte pour la Pologne!
Likevise pour l'Italie!
Den in der Tuileries courtyard
Ten tousand volk come on;
Dey vas gissin und hurrahin
For to dink der king vas gone.
Some vas hollerin und tantzin
Round de blazin oldt caboose;
Vhen Frantschmen kits a goin,
Den dey lets der teufel loose.
Boot von veller set me laughin,
Who roosh madly roun de field;
He hat rop de Cluny Museum,
Und gestohlen speer und schild.
Mit a sblendit royal charger,
Vitch he hat somevhere found,
Like a trunken Don Quixote,
He vent tearin oop und round.
Doun vent de line of Bourbons,
Doun vent de vork of years,
Ash de pillars of deir temple
Gecrashed like splintered speers;
Und o'er dem rosed a phantom,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN FORTYEIGHT. 99
Page No 103
Wild, beautiful, und weak,
Vhile millions gry arount her
Vive! vive la Republique;
Tree days mid shdiflin powder shmoke,
Tree days mid cheers und groans,
Ve fought to guard de parricades,
Or pile dem oop mit shtones.
De hand vitch held de bistol denn,
Or made de crowbar bite,
Das war de same Hans Breitmann's hand
Vitch now dese verses write.
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM.
"Vlaenderen, dag en nacht
Denk ik aen u.
Waer ik ook ben en vaer,
Gy zyt my altyd naer.
Vlaenderen, dag en nacht
Denk ik aen u.
Overal vrolykheid,
Overal lust.
Maegden van fier gelaet,
Knapen zoo vroom en draet.
Overal vrolykheid,
Overal lust."
Hoffmann von Fallersleben.
SPA.
VHEN sommer drees shake fort deir leafs,
Ash maids shake out deir locks,
Und singen mit de rifulets,
Vitch ripplen round de rocks,
Und beople swarm landoutwards,
Und cities weary men,
Hans Breitmann rode de Belgier mark
For Spa in Les Ardennes.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM. 100
Page No 104
Und vhen he came to Spadenland,
He found it fein und fair,
For dey pour him out de peke schnapps,
Dazu elixer rare;
Und mit a soldier's inshdink
To find a shanse to shoot,
Mitout delay he fire afay
Right in de Grande Redoute.[57]
De virst shot dat der Breitmann fired
He pring de peaches down,
For he hit de double zero mit
A gold Napoleon.
Und ash he raked de shiners in,
He hummed a liddle doon:
"I kess I tont try dat again,"
Said he, dis afdernoon.
Boot vhen he coom to rouge et noir,
A tear fell tripplin denn,
Id look so moosh like goot old dimes,
To come dose games again.
Yet vhen he lossed a hundred francs,
He sadly toorned afay,
"I'd rader keep de tiger here,
Dan vight him, any day."
Und shtanding py de daple,
He saw a French lorette
Vat porrowed shpecie all around,
Und lossed at efery bet.
"Id's all de same mit dis or dat,
Or any kind of sin,
De lorette or de rolette bot'
Will make de money shpin."
He trinket of Le Pouhon well,
Und from La Sauveniere;
He tried it ad de Barisart,
Und auch de Geronstere.
"Dey say dat Troot' lie in a well,
So trink from all we can,
Und here we'll prove dat Troot is Health,"
Dat's so, sayd Breitemann.
So long in ruined Franchimont
He sat on hollowed ground,
Und dinked of Wilhelm de la Marck,
Who'd raked dat coontry round.
"Mein Gott! how id vas mofe mine heart
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM. 101
Page No 105
To read in hishdory,
Und find de scattered shinin lights
Of vellers shoost like me!
"Dis nople boarpig of Ardennes,
Dis shtately Wallowin lord,
Vas make him vamous py de pen,
Und glorious py de swordt.
Und showed his heroscholarship,
Vhen he wrote to de pishop, 'Satis,
Brulabo monasterium
Vestrum, si non payatis.'
"Dey say dat in de keller here
Dere lifes a coblin briest,
Dereto a teufelsjagersmann
Vot guard a specie chest.
O if I vonce could find de vay,
Und spot dat box of checks,
I voonder shoost how long 'twould pe
Pefore I'd twis deir necks."
Und in de Walk of Meyerbeer,
Vhere plashin brooklets ring,
He see vhere in de water wild
De woodbirds flip deir wing.
"Ash de prooklet's lost in de rifer,
Und de rifer's lost in de sea,
Mine soul kits lost on water 'plain,'"
Says Breitemann, says he.
Und ash he walked de Meyerbeer
He marcked, peside de way,
A rock shoost like a wild boar's head,
Vraie tete du sanglier.
Der Breitmann heafe a shiant sigh,
Und say mit 'motion grand:
Von crate idee ish uber all
In dis der Schweinpig's land.
He drafel troo de Val d'Ambleve,
He lounge de schweet Sept Heures,
He shdare indo de windowshops,
Und see de painted ware.[58]
He looket at de fans und dings,
Denn said, "To tell de trut',
Dere's painted vares more dear ash dis
Oop shdairs in La Redoute."
Und sittin in de Champignon,
Vitch rose 'neat Lofe's schweet hand,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN BELGIUM. 102
Page No 106
He read in books of Marmontel,
Of Jeannette et Lubin.
Id's nice to see Simplicitas
Rococoed oop mit vlowers,
Und dink soosh virtue shdill may life
In dis base vorldt of ours.
'Tvas here, oopon de Spadoumont
Deir gottashe used to set;
'Tvas here they keeped von simple cow
Likevise an lettucebett.
Berhaps I hafe crown vorldly since,
Yet shdill may druly say,
Dat in mine poyhood's tays I vas
Apout so good ash dey.
But he vot vant to see dis land,
Und has nod time for all:
Eash woodland nook und shady brook;
On Herr Marcette shouldt call.
For he has baintet all to live
Vhen de drees demselfs are gone;
Und shoost so goot as artist, auch,
Ish he bon compagnon.
Farevell, schveet Spa dou home of vlowers,
Of ruin and of rock,
Vhere vild pirds sing und de band ish blay
Eash day at sefen o'clock.
If all de shbrees dat Spa has seen
Vere melted into von,
De soul vouldt reach Nirwana lost
In transcendental fun.
OSTENDE.
"Hupsa! jonker Jan,
Die wel ruiter worden kan."
BOON tidings to der Breitmann came
Ash he at table end,
Dere's right goot fisch at Blankenberghe,
Und oysters in Ostend.
Denn to Ostland ve will reiten gaen,
To Ostland o'er de sand,
Dou und I mit pridle drawn
For dere ish de oyster land.
The Breitmann Ballads
OSTENDE. 103
Page No 107
Und vhen dey shtood bei Ostersee,
Vhere de waters roar like sin,
Dere coom five hundert fischer volk
To dake der Breitmann in.
"Gotts doonder! Should ve doomple down
Amoong de waters plue,
I kess you'd vant more help from me
Dan I should vant from you!
"If you hat peen vhere I hafe peen
Und see vot I hafe see,
Vhere de surf rise oop nine tausend feet,
In de land of Nieuw Jarsie
Und schwimmed dat surf ash I hafe schwimmed,
Peside de Jersey stran'"
From dat day fort' de Ostland men
Shdeered glear of der Breitemann.
Boot von ding set him schvearin so,
I dinked he'd nefer cease,
De Ostend oysters kostet more
In Ostend als Paris.
Hans asked an anciendt fisherman,
To 'splain dis if he may,
Und says he, "Mijn Heer dey're beter hier
Als ein hundert leagues afay.
"Und as de oysters beter hier
Of course dey kostet more"
Der Breitmann dook his bilcrim shdaff,
Und toorned him to de toor.
Says Hans, "De Vlaemsche fischermen
Can sheat de vorldt I pet
Dey sheaten von anoder too,
All's fisch to a Dutchman's net.
"Der king peginned a palace hier,
De palace hat to shtop,
He foundt de beoples sheaten so
He gife de bildin oop.
Aldough das Leben hier ish goot,
Ad least Ostendsibly"
So shpoke der Breitemann und cut
Dat city py de sea.
The Breitmann Ballads
OSTENDE. 104
Page No 108
GENT.
"Wie kennt die stad waer alles nog
Van Vlaenderens grootheid spreekt?
Waer ontrouw, valschheid en bedrog
Van schaemte nog verbleekt?"
Ledeganck.
If I hat gold, as I hafe time,
I tells you how 'tvere shpent,
On efery year I'd shtay a week
In Vlanderen's hoofstad, Gent.
For, oh! de sveet wild veelins,
In dat stad do mofe me so,
Vhen I'd dink of all de clorious men
Vot life dere long aco.
If efer man hat manly heart,
He'd veel dat heart to beat,
Vhen mit de oldten dime of Ghent
He valks troo efery shdreet.
Und ach! de volk are yet so goot,
It gave me soosh a pliss,
Vhen I hear a bierhous spielman sing
A melodie like dis:
"Het was op eenen Monday,
All on a Monday free,
Dat mijnheere Jacob Van Artevelde
Unto his men said he:
He seide 'Mijn lief gesellen,
Ve all moost ride out land,
And trive our way to Bruges town
Or Brussel in Braband.'
"Und as he oonto Brussel cam,
De meisjes sprong from bed,
Und found Mynheere Van Artevelde
Mit a crossbolt troo his head."
Und shoost pecause dis bierhous song
Recht troo my heartsen vent,
I feel dat I could life und die
All in de down of Gent.
The Breitmann Ballads
GENT. 105
Page No 109
BREITMANN IN HOLLAND.
'S GRAVENHAGE THE HAGUE.
IN dis boem, mein freund der Herr Breitmann hafe his fiews on art
peforegeset mit a deepness und shorthood vich is bropably oonliked
in Aesthetik. Ve hafe here, within de circumcomprehensifeness of
dirtytwo lines, a theorie vitch shortsomely exbressed sends to
der teufel efery dings ash vas efer gescribed pefore on kunst or
art, und maket efery podies from Baumgartner doun to Fischer und
Taine, look shoost like puddinheadet old gasbalgs. Boot to de
boem. For de informadion of dem ash ish not gestudied art, I vould
shtate dat Adriaan Brauwer (who ish as regards an unvollkomene
technik de first of all Holland malers), vas nefer paint nodings
boot droonken plackguards und liederlich dings, und Van Ostade und
Jan Steen vas in most deir bilds a goot deal like him.
FRITZ SCHWACKENHAMMER.
Hans reitet troo de Nederland,
From Rotterdam below,
To Gravenhaag und Leyden
Und Haarlem all a row;
He shtoodit in de galleries
A tausend works of art;
Boot ach der Adriaan Brauwer,
Vent most teepest to his heart.
Und dus exglaim der Breitmann
In woondersolemn shdrain,
"De cratest men vere Brauwer,
Van Ostade, und Jan Steen.
Der Raffael vas vel enof;
Dat ish in his shmall vay;
Boot Gott im Himmel! vot vas he
Coompared mit soosh as dey?
"Shoost see dat vight of troonken boors
Von tears de oder's goat:
Vhile de oder mit a pointet knife
Ish goin for his troat.
Und a madchen mit a treeleg shtuhl
Ish clip him on de het,
In dese higher human passion valks,
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN IN HOLLAND. 106
Page No 110
Der Raffael's coldt und deadt.
"De more ve digs into de eart'
Or less ve seeks a star,
De nearer ve to Natur coom,
More pantheistich far;
To him who reads dis myst'ry right,
Mit insbiration gifen,
Der Raffael's rollen in de dirt,
Vhile Brauwer soars to Heafen.
LEYDEN.
TIS shveet to valk in Holland towns
Apout de twilicht tide,
Vhen all ish shdill on proad canals,
Safe vhere a poat may clide.
Shdrange light on darkenin vater falls,
In long soft lines afar,
Der abenddroth on dunkelheit,
Vitch shows or hides a star.
De pridges risen all aroundt
So quaindly, left und right,
Pedween each pridge und shattow, lies,
A lemon of yellow light,
Und das volk agoin ober,
So darklin onwarts pass,
Dey look like Chinese shattows shown
Apofe a lookinglass.
All shdiller grows, und shdiller,
Sogar die efenin preeze,
Ish only heardt far ober het
In dese long lines of drees;
A real oldt Holland feelin
Cooms gadderin ober all,
You'd nefer dink a sturm hat peen
Oopon dis Grand Canawl.
De nople houses! how dey'd mofe
An old New Yorker's heart,
Time vas twix dese und dose at home
You couldn't tell 'em part,
Mit crate brass knockers on de toors,
Und parlors town so low
You see de crates a glowin prite
The Breitmann Ballads
LEYDEN. 107
Page No 111
O'er carbets ash you go.
Dere's comfortfull of avery dings,
You veel it ash you look,
You knows de volks ish opulend,
Und keep a bully cook;
Und oopon de high camine,
Or here und dere on shelf,
Dere's Japanesisch dings in rows,
Pe mingled oop mit delf.
Dere's noding in dis Holland life,
Vitch seems of present day,
De fery shildren in de shdreeds
Look quaintlich as dey blay;
De liddle rosy housemaids,
In bicdures vell I know,
De dames und heers hafe all an air
Of sixdy years ago.
They may dalk of anciendt hishdory
Und for romantisch seek,
De ding dat mofes most teeply ish
Oldvashioned not antique.
O if you live in Leyden town
You'll meet, if troot' pe told,
De forms of all de freunds who tied
Vhen du werst six years old.
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE.
Oldt Flamisch.
HET vas Mijn Heer van Torenborg,
Ride oud oopon de sand,
Und vait to hear a paardeken;
Coom tromplin from de land.
He vaited vhen de boeren volk
Vent oud oopon de plain,
He vaited dill de veary crows
Flew nestwarts home acain.
He vaited ash de wild fox vaits
In longsome hoonger noth,
He vaited dill de flitterin bats
Vere plack on Abendroth.
Id's woe to watch for taily bread
The Breitmann Ballads
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE. 108
Page No 112
Or bide forgotten call,
Boot oh, to vait for heartsen lofe
Ish veariest of dem all.
"O dat ish not mine laity's prooch
Shoost now so starlike shined,
O dat ish not mine laity's haar
Soft floatin on de wind.
Her goot crayhound mit soosh a step
Vas nefer vont to go,
Und dat is niet her paardeken
Whose shtep so vell I know.
"Dat light ish speer light from a lanz
Vitch'll part mine pody und soul,
De floatin haar is a pennon gay
Or wafin banderol.
De crayhound ish a ploothound wild
Vitch long has dracked me here,
Und het paardeken ish a varhorse
Vot has hoonted me like deer."
Well shpoke Mijn Heer van Torenborg
All drue vas afery wordt,
For dey bored him troo mit lanzen,
Und dey hewed him mit de swordt.
Dey killt him armloss, harmlos;
De plooty reiver band;
Und puried him so careloosly
Dat his vace shtick out de sand.
Boot e'er night's plack hat toorned to red
Or e'er de stars vere gone,
Dere came de shtep of a paardeken
Soft tromplin, tromplin on.
A laity fair climped off on him
Und trip mit dainty toes:
Boot oh, mijn Gott! how she vas shkreem
Ven she trot on her drue lofe's nose!
"Oh vot ish dis I trots opon?
Id's shape fool well I know,
Dere nefer yet vas flower like dis,
Dat in de garten crow.
Dere nefer yet vas fruit like dis
Ash ripen on a dree;
Het is Mijn Heer van Torenborg
Dat kan ik blainly see.
"Dat heerlijk nose, van Torenborg,
Ish known of anciend dime,
The Breitmann Ballads
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE. 109
Page No 113
'Tis writ in olten chronikel
Und sung in minsdrel rhyme.
Und dis, de noblest of de race
Since hishdory pegans,
Ish shtickin here shdraighdt out de dirt,
Shoost like some boer manns.
"Oh cuss de man dat mordered him!
Ach, cuss him oop and down,
Ja cuss him troo de forest roads,
Und tamn him in de toun!
Und burn his vater und moder,
Vhere'er deir vootshteps vall,
Mit his schwesters und his broders,
De teufel rake dem all!
"May afery cuss dat e'er vas cusst,
Since cussin foorst pegan;
Pe hoorled in von drementous cuss,
Acainsdt dat nasdy man!
From de foorst crate cuss on Adam,
To de smalles' of de crop"
Here de tead man gafe a shifer,
Und gry oud "For Gott's sake shdop!
"Dere's a cerdain lot of shwearin,
Vitch anger alvays crafes;
Boot spite like dat's enof to pring
De tead men from deir craves.
I can't lie here no longer,
Und hear soosh pizen pain;
Und since you've shtirred me out, I kess
I'll coom to life acain."
Mit von drementous shkreem of pliss,
His drue lofe shtood de shock,
Den catcht him wildly py de nose,
"Ach Torenborg lev'st du nock!
Ach ja du aint'st nod tead yet!
Dere's life shdill lef' pehind,
Gott pless de dat lef' dy nose,
Shdill wafin in de wind."
Mit hands all ofer diamonds,
She loosed de sand apout,
Mit an oystershell so wildly
She digged her lofer out.
"Und now dou'rt in free air, lofe!
Who warst shoost now in sand!
Dere vasn't ish a nicer man,
In all de Nederland!
The Breitmann Ballads
SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE. 110
Page No 114
Vhere vas dit liedeken written,
Vhere vas dit liedeken sing,
Dat had gedone Hans Breitmann,
In de town of Schevening!
'Tvas written ober Rheinwein,
'Tvas written ober bier
Und wer das lied gesungen hat,
Gott geb ihm ein glucklich's jahr.[59]
AMSTERDAM.
TO Amsterdm came Breitmann
All in de Kermes tide;
Yonge Maegden allegader
Filled de straat on afery side.
De meisjes in de straaten
Vere tantzin alle nacht long;
Dere vas kissen, dere vas trinken,
Mit a roar of Holland song.
Who went into de straaten
Ven de sonn had gone his day,
De Dootch gals quickly grapped him
Und tantzed him wild avay.
Dere was der Prinz von Capua,
Who fell among dese wags;
Dey tantzed him off in a carmagnole,
Und sent him home in rags.
Und den at afery gorner,
So peaudifool to see,
De volk vas bilin doughnuts,
Or else vas fryin tea.
Und Kermes cakes mit boetry,
Vitch landvolk dinks a dreat,
Mit all of Barnum's blayed out shows
In dents along de shdreet.
Id pring de tears to Breitmann's eyes,
To find in many a shtand
Vot oft he'd baid a quarder for
To see in a distand land.
De Aztec dwins und de Siamese
(Dough soom vere a wachsen sham);
Mit de Beardet Frau und de Bear Woman
All here in Amsterdam
The Breitmann Ballads
AMSTERDAM. 111
Page No 115
De fashion here in Nederland
Ish not vot you'd soopose,
Mit oos, men bays de vomens,
Boot de Dootch gals hires deir beaux!
Dey hire dem for de season,
Und because moosh rain ish fell,
Dey alvays bays a higher brice,
For a man mit an umberell.
Und dere vas Nord Hollander maids,
So woonderfool to see,
Mit caps of gold und goldne pins,
Und quaint orfeverie.
Likewise de Zeeland Boersmen,
Mit silber bootons gay;
Und silber belts, und silber knives,
Mijn Gott! how sdrange vere dey!
But dough de men wore silber gear,
Und de vrouws in gold were tall,
De gals vere gabblin all de dimes,
Und de men said noding at all.
"Dey say dat sbeech is silbern,
Boot silence golden pe,
Dat aint de vay dey vork id here,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Goot Gott! how Breitmann vent it,
In moonlighdt or in rain;
Den vakened to Schiedm it,
Ven de mornin peamed again.
For to solfe von awfool broplem,
He vas efer shdill incline;
If den wijn is beter als de min,[60]
Or de min doet veel meer als de wijn.
Dwo weeks der Breitmann studiet,
Vile he vent it on de howl.
He shpree so moosh to find de troot,
Dat he lookt like a biled owl.
Den he say, "Ik wil honor Bacchus,
So long as ik leven shall;
Boot not so moosh vercieren
As to blace him ofer all.
De rose of lofe is lofely
In zomer ven it plow;
De bush shdill gifes a bromise,
In winter mid de shnow;
Ja, als de bloeme is geplukt,
The Breitmann Ballads
AMSTERDAM. 112
Page No 116
En van den steel genomen,[61]
Ve know de peautiful vill life,
Till zomer is gekomen.
Boot oh dose vas archheafenly dimes,
Ven by mine lofe I sat;
Und see de maedchen pring de grapes,
Und crash dem in a vat.
Und ven her glances unto mine
In plessfool ropture toorn;
I dink dere ne'er vas no dwo crapes
Like dem plue eyes of hern.
Wat is soeter als de trinken,[62]
Ja niet kan beter zyn.
Niet is soeter as de minne,
It smackt nog beter als wijn.
Es giebt nichts wie die Madchen,
Es gibt nichts wie das Bier,
Wer liebt nicht alle beide,
Wird gar kein Cavalier.
O vot ve vant to quickest come
Ish dat vot's soonest gone.
Dis life ish boot a passin from
de efergominon.
De gloser dat ve looks ad id,
De shmaller it ish grow;
Who goats und spurs mit lofe und wein,
He makes it fastest go.
GERMANY.
BREITMANN AM RHEIN COLOGNE.
HOW wunderschon das Vaterland
In audumnlife abbears;
Vot rainpows gild ids vallies crand,
Ven seen troo vallin tears.
Und VON I'll creet mit sang und klang,
Und drown in goldnen wein;
The Breitmann Ballads
GERMANY. 113
Page No 117
Old Deutschland's cot her sohn again:
Hans Breitmann's on der Rhein.
Und doughts ish schwell dat mighdy heart,
Too awfool for make known;
Ven dey shunt him from de railroat car
Und tropped him in Cologne.
De holy towers of de dome
Cleam, twilichtveiled, afar;
Und like some lonely bilgrim's pipe,
Dim shines de efenin star.
Hans look to find his baggage check,
Und see dat all ish shdraighdts,
Denn toorn him to de city toors,
"Mein nadife land wie gehts?"
Boot dat's vot all who read may run
Fool blainly armies write;
Id's ofer all half Shermany,
Set down in Black and White.
Oh, Black and White! O Weiss and Schwarz!
Vot dings ish dis to see?
I vonder vot in future years
Your mission ish to pe?
Also in crate America
We had soosh colors too!
Die Farb' sind mir nicht unbekannt[63]
Id's shoost tout comme chez nous.
Next tay to de Cathedral
He vent de dings to view,
Und found it shoost drei thaler cost
To see de sighds all troo.
"Id's tear," said Hans; "boot go ahet,
I'fe cot de cash all right;
Boot id's queer dat's only Protestands
Vot mosdly see de sighdt!
"Im Mittelalter I hafe read
De shoorsh vas alvays sure
An open bicdure gallerie,
Und book for all de poor.
Boot now de dings is so arrange
No poor volk can get in;
We Yankees und de Englisch are
Pout all ash shbends de tin.
"I shmiles like Mephistopheles
In shoorshes ven I see
Poor Catholics vollerin round apout
The Breitmann Ballads
GERMANY. 114
Page No 118
To shdeal a sighdt troo ME!
Dey peep und creep roundt chapel gates,
Boot soon kits trofe afay,
Dey gross demselfs, und make a brayer
Boot den dey cannot bay!
"Dese Deutsche sacrisdans might learn
More goot in Italy,
Where beoples bays shoost half de brice,
For ten dimes more to see,
De volk vot dink I shbeak sefere
Apout dese Kuster vays,
May read vot Mr. Badeker
In his Belgine Hand Buch says."
Und valkin oop und town de down
Von ding vas shdill de same:
Shoost ash of oldt he saw de shpread
Of Jean Farina's name.
He find it nort', he find it sout',
He find it eferyvhere;
Dere vas no house in all Cologne
Boot J. M. F. vas dere.[64]
De best Cologne in all Cologne
I'll shwear for cerdain sure,
Ish maket in de Julichsplatz
Und dat at Numero Four.
Boot of dis Cologne in Julichsplatz
Let dis pe understood,
Dat some of id ish foorstrate pad,
Vhile some is foorstrate good.
Boot von ding drafellers moost opserve,
Dis treadful trut I dells,
Fast ash dis Farinaceous crowd
So vast hafe grown the schmells
Dose awfool schmells in gass' und strass'
Vitch mofe crate Coleridge squalm:
If so he wrote, vot vouldt he write
Apout dem now, py tam?
Of all de schmells I efer schmelt,
Py gutter, sink, or well,
At efery gorner of Cologne
Dere's von can peat dat schmell.
Vhen dere you go you'll find it so,
Don't dake de ding on troost;
De meanest skunk in Yankee land
Vould die dere of disgoost.
The Breitmann Ballads
GERMANY. 115
Page No 119
Boot noding dinked der Breitmann
Of schmutz or idle schein,
Vhen he sat in Abendammerung
Und looket owd on der Rhein
Im goldnen gleam vhile pealin far
Rang shlow, shveet kloster bells,
Und in de dim, plue peaudiful,
Rose distant Drachenfels.
Dey trinket lieb Liebfrauenmilch
So pure ash voman's trut';
De singed de songs of Shermany,
De songs of Breitmann's yout'.
De songs mit tears of vanished years,
Made peaudiful in wein.
Dus endet out de firster tay
Of Breitmann on der Rhein.
AM RHEIN. No. II.
IM KAHN.
"Were diu werlt alle min,
Von deme mere unze an den Rin.
Des wolt ih mih darben,
Daz diu dame von Engellant
Lege an minen armen."
Carmina Burana.
AM Rhein! Acain am Rheine!
In boat oopon der Rhein!
De castlebergs soft goldnen
Im Abendsonnenschein,
Mit lots of Rudesheimer,
Und saitenklang und sang,
Und laties singin lieder,
Ash ve go sailin 'long.
Und von fair Englisch dame
Vas dere, so wunderscheen;
Vene'er der Breitmann saw her,
Id made his heartsen pain.
Oh, dose longtailed veilchen Augen,
Vitch voke soosh hopes und fears,
Deir shape vas nod like almonds,
Boot more like fallin tears.
The Breitmann Ballads
AM RHEIN. No. II. 116
Page No 120
Und shpecdagles were o'er dem,
De glass of pincenez kind,
In mercy to de beoples,
Less dey pe shdrucken blind.
Und gazin in dem glasses,
Reflected he pehold
De Rhine, mit all de shdeampoats,
Und crags in Sonnengold.
De signs upon de bierhaus;
De gals awashin close;
De weingarts on de moundain,
Like heafenly shdairs in rows:
De banks, basalticpaven,
Like beehife cells to view;
A donkey shtandin on dem,
Likevise her lofer too.
All dis oopon dos glasses
Vas blainly to pe seen;
One saw whate'er vas nodiced,
Py de schone Englandrinn.
Boot oh! de fery lofemost
Of all dat lofemost pe
Her own plue veilchen Augen
Herself she couldt not see.
So ist es in dis Leben;
For beaudy oft we spied,
Nor know de cratest peaudy
Ish in our soul inside.
Mein Gott! Vot himmlisch shplendor
Vas seen mitout an toubt,
If some crate bower supernal
Vas toorn oos insite out!
Und gazin long on Natur,
Und gazin long on Man,
Shdill all dings glite voruber,
Ash since de vorldt pegan:
Ash in dat laity's glasses,
Ve see dem bassin py;
Yet veel a soul beneat' dem,
A schweet eternal eye.
O schone Englisch maiden
Mit honeycolored hair,
Dat flows ash if a beinen korb
Had got oopsettet dere
Und all de schweetness of your soul
Vas dripplin from your brain!
The Breitmann Ballads
AM RHEIN. No. II. 117
Page No 121
Oh shall I efer meet mit dir
Oopon dis eart' acain?
O Englisch engel maiden!
O schveet betaubend dofe!
O Rheinwein und cigarren!
O luncheon, mixed mit lofe!
O Drachenfels und Nonnenwerth!
O Liebeslust und pein!
Dus ents de second chapterlet
Of Breitmann on der Rhein.
AM RHEIN. No. III.
NONNENWERTH.
(Alt Deutsch.)
HE shtood peside de Klosterplace,
Oopon de Rheinisch shore,
Und dere he saw a lofely face,
He'd seen in treams pefore.
"Feinslieb, und will'st dou go mit me?
Feinsllieb, make no delay;
For rocks ish shdeep und vales ish teep,
Und dings ish in de way."
"Und oh! how can I go mit dir,
Or flyen out of land?
Der bischof holts me py de law,
Der Rheingraf by der hand.
"Liebsherz, if dou could'st landwarts gehn,
I'd follow willingly;
Boot we are leafs, und shdrong's de shdem
Vitch pinds oos to de dree."
"Der briest who helt dee py de law
Ish now a broken man;
Der Rheingraf who vouldt marry dee
Ish in der Kaisar's ban.
"Und if de Klosterbeoples here
Vill shdop your goin to town,
Bei Gott! I'll burn von half of dem,
De oder half I'll trown!
The Breitmann Ballads
AM RHEIN. No. III. 118
Page No 122
"Denn linger not to back dy drunk,
Boot led our lofe hafe vings;
Dere's milliners in fair Cologne,
Vill make you avery dings."
She toorn her eyes im mondenschein,
She schmile so heafenly;
"Dear lofe, so shendle und so goot!
I'll cut away mit dee.
"Und do not killl de Klostervolk,
'Tvouldt only bring tiscrace!
Dough if I had de abbess here,
Lort! how I'd slap her vace!"
De moonlighdt blayed oopon de drees,
It shined oopon de blain,
Two forms rode in de mitnight woods,
Und nefer coomed again.
MUNICH.
GAMBRINUS.
"Vot ish Art? Id ish somedings to drink, objectively
foregebrought in de Beaudiful. Doubtest dou? denn read, ash
I hafe read, de Dyonisiacs of Nonnus, and learn dat de
oopboorstin of infinite worlds into edernal Light und mad goldnen
Lofeliness yea of dein own soul is typifide only py de CUP.
Vot! shdill skebdigal? Tell me denn, O dou of liddle fait, vere on
eart ish de kunst obtain ids highest form if not in a BIERSTADT?[65]
Ha! ha! I poke you dere!"
Caupo Recauponatus, MS. by Fritz Swackenhammer, olim
candidatus theologiae at Tubingen, shoost now lagerbierwirth in St.
Louis. (Dec. 1869.)
"Cerevisia bibunt homines
Animalia ceterae fontes."
In a field of goldnen parley
Goot King Gambrinus shlept,
Und treamin' pout de dursty volk,
Dey say he gried und vept.
"In all mine land of Nederland,
Dere crows no mead or wein,
Und wasser I couldt nefer get
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Page No 123
Indo dis troat of mein.
"Now hear me on, ye headen gotts!
Und all de Christian too;
Der Bacchus und der Shoopider,
Und Marie tressed in plue!
Und mighdy Thor, der donner gott,
Und any else dat be!
Der von as helps me in dis Noth,
His serfant I will pe."
Und ash dis sinfull headen
All in de parley lay,
Dere coom in tream an angel
Who soft dese worts tid say:
"Stay oop, dou boor Gambrinus!
For efen all aroundt
Im parley vhere dou shleepest,
Some dings goot to trink ish found.
"Im parley vhere dou shleepest
Dere hides a trink so clear,
Dat men will know zukunftig
Ash porter ale or bier."
Und denn in Nederlandisch
He put de konig troo,
Und gafe him allwhile treaming
De recipe to prew.
Oop rose der goot Gambrinus,
Und shook him in de sun:
"Go vay, ye sinfool headen gotts!
Mit you its out und done!
Ye'fe left me mit mine beoples
In error und in durst,
Till in our treadful tryness,
Ve tont know vitch is wurst."
Dat vas der goot Gambrinus
Oonto his palac't vent,
Und loafers troo de Nederland
To all his lordts he sent.
"Leave Odin or you lose your hets!"
De order vas sefere,
Yet tinged mit mildness, for he sent
De recipe for bier.
O den a merry sound vas heardt
Of bildin troo de land,
Und de kirchen und de braweries
Vent oop on efery hand;
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Page No 124
For de masons dey vere hart at vork,
Und trinkin hart at dat,
Und some hat bricks mitin de hods,
Und some mitin deir hat.
Dey prew it in de Nederland,
Dey prew it on de Rhine;
Boot in de oldt Bavarian land,
Dey make it shdrong und fein.
Und he dat trinks in Munich,
Ash all goot vellers know,
Has got somedings to dink apout,
Vherefer he may go.
II.
Hafe you heardt of Kong Gambrinus?
If you hafen't id vas gueer,
For he vas de first erfinder
Und de holy saint of bier.
Und his bortrait, mit a sceptre,
Fery peaudifool to see,
Hangs on afery lagerbier house,
In de land of Germanie.
Efery vhere de whole world ofer,
Deutschers paint him on de sign,
As a broof dat dey are dealin
In de Bok und Lager line.
Crown und biermug, robe und ermine;
German signs of empire, dese,
Mit a long white beard a fallin'
Fery nearly to his knees.
Vonce dis biersaint, pright und early,
Rose from bett und vent his vay,
To a dark mysderious gastle,
Vhere his lagerdonjon lay.
Vhile de lark's first song vas ringin',
Und die roses shone in dew,
Den his soul vas shoost in order
To enshoy de early brew.
Deeply, awfooly he schwilled it,
Till de vaults seem toornin round;
Und vhile tipsy over tips he
In he falls und dere is trowned.
Yet vhile goorglin in de bierfass,
Biously he gafe his soul:
"Gott verdammich! Donnerwetter!
Himmels sacramentamol!"
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Dere dey found der kong "departed,"
Not mitout his stirup cup:
Moosh dey woonderd dat he berishet
Vhen he might hafe troonk it oop;
Or dat his long peard vitch floatet
Fool a yard on efery side,
Hadn't buoyed him from destrugdion:
Dus der beerdead monarch died.
FRANKFORTONTHEMAIN.
"Sankt Martin war ein frommer Mann
Trank gerne Cerevisiam,
Und hatt er kein Pecuniam
So liess er seinen Tunicam."
(Comment by Herr Schwackenhammer.)
VONCE oopon a dimes in Frankfort der Herr Breitemann exsberiencet
an interfal pedween de periot ven he hat gespent de last remiddance
he hat become from home, und de arrifal of de succedin wechsel, or
bill of exghange und, in blain derms, was hard up. Derefore he
vent to dat goot relation who may pe foundt at den or fifdeen per
cent all de worlt ofer, "mine Onkel," und poot his tressgoat
oop de shpout for den florins. No sooner vas dis done, dan dere
coomed an infitation from de English laity in whom he vas so moosh
mit lofe in betaken, to geh mit her to a ballbarty. Awful bad vas
he veel, und sot apout tree hours mitout sayin nodings, und denn
wafin his hand, boorst out mit de vollowin version of dat peaudiful
lied by Wilhelm Caspary:
"Mein Frack ist im Pfandhaus."
Mine tressgoat is shpouted, mine tressgoat aint hier,
Vhile you in your ballropes go splurgin, mein tear!
To barties mit you I'm infitet you know,
Boot my pest coat ish shpouted mine poots are no go.
To hell mit mine Onkel dat rasgally knafe!
Dis pledgin und pawnin has mate me his slafe!
Ven I dink of his signbost, den dree dimes I bawl,
Vhile mine plack pants hang lonely und dark on de wall.
Goot night to dee fine lofe so lofely und rich,
Mein tressgoat ish shpouted gonfount efery stitch!
I dinks dat olt Satan troo all mine affairs,
Lofe, business, und fun, has peen sewin his tares.
My tressgoat ish shpouted mine tressgoat aint here,
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FRANKFORTONTHEMAIN. 122
Page No 126
While you in your glorie go shinin, mein tear,
Und de luck of der teufel ish loose ofer all,
Vhile my black pants hang lonely und dark on de wall.
Dis fourgoin song vas overset by der Hans Breitmann from de
German of Wilhelm Caspary, whose lyric vas a barody on a
dranslation made indo Deutsch by Freiligrath from anoder boem py
Sir Waldherr Scott, vitch Sir Waldherr vas kit de idee of from an
oldt Scottish ballad vitch pegin mit de vorts
"My hearts in de Hielands, mein hearts ish nae hier,
Mein hearts in de Hielands, in wilden revier;
It hoonts for de shtag, und id hunts for de reh,
Mein hearts ist im Hochland wo immer ich geh."
Dis is de original Scotch, as goot as I can mineself rememper it.
Ven I vas dell der Herr Karl Blind pout dis intercommixture of
perplexified dransitions from Scotch to English, and dence into
German, and dereafter into a barody, vitch vas be done ofer again indo
Herr Breitmann's own slanguage, he sait it vas a Rattenkonig a
phrase too familiar to mine readers to require any wider
complication.[66]
ITALY.
BREITMANN IN ROME.
DERE'S lighds oopon de Appian,
Dey shine de road entlang;
Und from ein hundert tombs dere brumms
A wild Lateinisch song;
It rings from Nero's goldnen haus;
Evoe! here he coom!
Fly oud, ye moenads, from your craves!
Hans Breitmann's got to Rome!
For vhile de lamp holts oud to purn,
Or von goot shpark ish dere,
Dere's hope for all of dem whose lives
Ish doun in Lempriere.
Von real, shenuine heathen
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Page No 127
Is coom at last to home;
Ye shleepin gotts, lift oop your hets
Hans Breitmann lifes in Rome!
Silenus mit der Hercules,
Dereto der Maia's sohn,
Ish all unite in Breitmann
To make a stunnin one.
Frau Venus mit de Bacchanals
Ist shmile to see him come;
De Vesta only toorn her pack
Vhen Breitmann kit to Rome.
He vented to de Vacuum,
Vhere de Bope ish keep his bulls;
Boot couldn't vind dem, dough he heardt
Dat all de blace vas fools.
Dere ish here and dere some ochsen,
Right manivest I see;
Boot de bools all comes from Irish priests,
Said Breitemann, said he.
Und goin' py de Vacuum,
Und passin' troo de yard;
Mein Gott! how vas he stoomple, vhen
He see der Schweitzer guard,
Mit efery kinds of colors tresst,
Like shtreamers in de van.
"Hans Wurst ist stets ein Deutscher g'west,"
Das marked der Breitemann.
Und dus replied an guartsmann:
"I shoys to see you here:
Ich bin dem Bapst sei Laibgaertner.
Dazu a halberthier.
Dis purpur kleid of yellowplue
Vas made, ash I hafe heard,
Py von Hans Michel Angelo,
Der tailor of our guard.
"Ve're shoost von hoondert dirty strong,
Ve list for twenty year;
De serfice ist not pad, boot dis
Verdamm das Romisch bier!
For ven mit birra gazzosa
A maiden fills my glass,
She might ash vell gife gift ash say
'Feinslieb, ich schenk dir dass!'"
Und dus rebly der Breitmann:
"Un Tedesco Italianazato,
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Page No 128
Ein Deutscher toorned Italian, ish
Il diavolo in carnato.
Your clothes are like infernal flames,
Dey burn my fery soul;
Boot tonight we'll trink togedder nun
Lieb'landsmann lebe wohl!"
At de Sherman artisds' festa,
Vhere all vas pright und fair,
'Tvas fairer und more prighterfull
Vhen Breitmann enter dere.
Und der vaiters in de Greco
(So long he trinked und sot)
Vas called him L'Ubbriacone
'Tvas de name der Breitmann got.
He saw a veller in de shtreet,
Vot sell some frictionmatches;
De kind dey call Infallible,
For dey blazes ven you scratches.
Dey dragged him off to brison,
Und tied him mit a rope;
For in Rome dere's nix Infallible,
Dey said, excebt de Bope.
Hans see de crate Prometheus,
In Corsini's gallery hang;
He tought apout de matches,
Und it made his heart go bang.
It's risk to carry light apout,
Too cheap for efery man;
How de Lucifers is fallen![67]
Ita dixit Breitmann.
He got among de Bope's Zouaves,
Dey trinked from morn to night;
Den frolicked colle belle
Ontil de shky crew pright.
It blease der Breitmann vonderfool,
And dus he often say:
"Zouaviter in modo ish
Der real Roman way."
Boot oh, his heart burned vild mit fire,
His eyes gefilled mit tears,
At de gotts in efery bilder saal,
Mit goats' legs, tails, und ears.
Und he sopped "Ach liebes Deutschland,
Bist here on every hand?
Was machst du Mephistopheles
So weit im Walschen Land?"
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Page No 129
Boot de woodnymphs boorst out laughin,
Der Gartengott dere to,
Und sait "Oldt Hans! vile you're apout
Ve nefer can look blue."
Den Pan blay on his Syrinx,
To de tune of Mary Blane,
"Don't gry pecause ve're out of town,
Ve're coming pack again.
"Von day you got de yolk und vhite,
De next day only shells;
Von day dey holts a council,
Und de next day 'someding else!'
Id's bopes und kings, und gotts and dings,
Oopon dis eartly ball;
Boot for me id's all von frolic,
Und a high oldt carnival!
"Rise oop, dou Odintrafeler,
Und toorn dee to de Nort,
Wherefrom, as Bible dells dee,
Crate efil shall come fort.
Dere is mutterins in Ravenna,
Und ere long dere'll come a turn,
A real hellbender from de land
Of Dieterich von Bern.
"Und ven der Breitmann's prototype,
Der Fictoor Manuel,
Cooms tromplin, tromplin troo de fern,
To give dis coontry hell.
Und ven in La Comarca,
Der is shtorm all in de air,
Dy Gotts vill gife dee vork, mein Sohn,
Hans Breitmann shall be dere!"
For a yar will nod be ofer
Pefore de Frantsch will run,
Und de game at last be ented,
Und Italy pe won.
Und denn in roarin battle,
For hishtory so grand,
Dy banner'll lead de Uhlan spears,
All in de Frankenland.
Nota bene. Dis boem was all written in 1869, pefore de
wars; und all de dings prophezeit in it coomed to bass. Herein der
Herr Breitmann abbears ash a Seher or Prophet so crate as de cratest
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ITALY. 126
Page No 130
ash nefer vas. Der crate ardist, Mishter W. W. Story, for whom dis
lied vas written, can proof all dis.
FRITZ SCHWACKENHAMMER.
[Redaktor.]
LA SCALA SANTA.
"Robusti sono i fatti."
Discorso del Terremoto,
del S. Alessandro Sardo.
Venetia, A.D. 1586.
IN San Gianni Lateran,
Dey've cot a flight of shdairs,
More woonderful ash nefer vas,
As Latin pooks declares.
For you kits your sins forgifen,
If you glimes dem knee py knee;
It's such a gitten up a stairs,
I nefer yet did see.
Now as Breitmann vas a vaitin
Among some demi reps,
Ascensionem expectans,
To see dem glime de steps,
Dere came a sinful scoffer,
Who his mind had firmly set
To go dem holy sdairs afoot,
Und do it on a bet!
Boot shoost as he vas startet,
To make dis sassy go,
Der Breitmann caught him py de neck,
Und tripped him off his toe!
Und den dere come de skience,
A la prenez gardez vous;
For he bung his eye and bust his shell,
Und shplit his noshe in dwo.
De briests vere so astonish,
To see him lam de man,
Dat dey shvore a holy miracle
Vas vork by Breitemann.
Says Breitmann, "I'm a heretic,
But dis you may pe bound,
No chap shall mock relishious dings
Vhile I'm a bummin round.
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LA SCALA SANTA. 127
Page No 131
"Und you owes me really noding,
For as I'll plainly show,
At last I've found out someding
Vot I alfays vant to know.
Und now dat I have found it,
In de newspapers I'll brag:
Evviva! Ho trovato,
Vot means a ScalaWag."[68]
BREITMANN INTERVIEWS THE POPE.
"Altri beva il Falerno, altri la Tolfa.
. . . . . . . .
Toscana re, dite
Pra ch'io parli dite."
Bacco in Toscano,
di Francisco Redi.
"Si regressum feci metro
Retro ante, ante retro
Quid si graves sunt acuti?
Si accentus fiant muti?
Quid si placide, plene, plane
Fregi frontem Prisciani?
Sat est Verbum declinavi
Titubotitubastitubavi."
Barnabae Itinerarium. London, 1716.
VON efenin ash der Breitmann vent from his weinhaus vinkin,
So peepy mit Falernian vitch he vas starkly trinkin,
He found his hut and goat was gone, dey'd dook em oud for dryin,
Und in deir blace a priester hut und priester mantel lyin.
Der Breitmann poot de triangel oopon his het, and whistled,
Den rop de cloak around his form, and down de Corso mizzled.
De beoples gazed mit staunischment as bey dem he go vheelin,
He look ganz oltra tramontane, so twisty vas his reelin.
Next tay in Vaticano, while he shtared at frescoes o'er him,
Hans toorned und mit amazemend saw der Pabst vas shoost pefore him!
Down on his knees der Breitmann vent for so de law it teaches;
He proke two holes in de bavement und likevise shblit
his preeches.
"Ego video," says de Bope "tu es antistes ex Almania,
Est una mala gente et corrupta con insania,
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BREITMANN INTERVIEWS THE POPE. 128
Page No 132
Un fons hereticorum et malorum tut terrible,
Perche non vultis che ego il Papa sei infallibile."
"Sit verbo venia," said Hans, "permitte, Sancte Pater,
Num verum est ut noster rum gemixta est mit water?
In coelis wo die gotter live, non semper est sereno,
Nor de wein ash goot ash decet in each spaccio di vino.
"Sunt mihi multi fratres qui si denkunt ut dicisti,
Ego kickerem illos, valide, per sanguine de Christi!
In nostro monasterio si habemus nostrum rentum
Contra infallibilita non curamus rubrum centrum.[69]
"Viginti nostrorum nuper convenere,
In quondam capitulo, simul et dixere;
Papa vult Concilium in Romam tenere,
Quid debemus super hoc ipsi respondere?"[70]
Et dixit noster presul, "Es ist mir omnis unus,
Si Papa est infallibilis, tanquam non sum jejunus,
Si nonus est Pius aut Pius est Nonus
Diabolis curat. Non accipio dieser onus.
"Si possum me jacere circum vitrum Rhenovini[71]
Es ist mir wurst si Papa est originis divini:
Deus se fecit olim homo, et nahm dis irds'che Leben,[72]
Et nunc Papa noster will sich selbst zum Gott erheben.
"Ita dixit Breitmann et sanctus Pater respondit:
Me piace semper intendere tutto cio che l'on dit,
Sed tu dic mihi la sua ragione:
Tu non homo natus es, solus mangiar maccheroni.
"Tonitrus et cespes!" dixit Johanes Breitmann.
"Si veritatem cupies, tunc ego sum der right man;
Percute semper ferrum dum caldum est et malleable,
Nunc est tuum tempus te facere infallible.
"In nostra America quum Praeses decet abire,
Die ultimo fecit omne quod posset imaginire.
Appointet ambasciatores et postmagistros,
Consules et alios, per dextros et sinistros.
"Quum Rex Bomba ista Neapolitanus,
Compulsus fuit to shin it ut dixit Africanus
Fecit ultimo die ducos et countos, vanus.
(Inter alios M'Closkey, tuus Hibernicus chanberlanus.)[73]
"Et quia tu es; ut credo; ultimus Poporum,
Facis bene devenire, quod dicitur High Cockalorum
Sei magnissimus toad in the puddle, ite caput, magnamente;
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Page No 133
Et ERITIS SICUT DEUS, nemine contradicente!
"Unus error solus, Sancte Pater commisisti.
Quia primus infallible non te proclamavisti,
Nam nemo audet dicere: Papa fecit quod non est bonus.
Decet semper jactare super alios probandi onus.
'Conceptio Immaculata, hoc modo fixisti,
Et nemo audet dicere unum verbum, de isti:
Non vides si infallibilis es, et vultis es exdare,[74]
Non alius sed tu solus hanc debet proclamare."
"Figlio mio," dixit Papa; "Tu es homo mirabilis,
Tua verba sunt mi dulcior quam ostriche cum Chablis
In tutta Roma, de Alemania gente,
Non ho visto uno con si grande mente.
"Vero benedetto es eris benedictus,
Tibi mitterem photographiam in quo sum depictus.
Tu comprendes situatio il punto et gravamen.
Sunt pauci clerici ut te. Nunc dico tibi. Amen!"
THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS
THAT IT NEVER APPEARED.
"Uns ist in alten Maeren
wunders viel geseit
Von Helden lobebaeren,
von grosser Arebeit.
Von Festen und Hochzeiten,
von Weinen und Klagen,
Von kuehnen Recken Streiten,
moht Ihr nun Wunder horen sagen."
Der Nibelungen Lied.
DO oos, in anciend shdory,
Crate voonders ish peen told
Of lapors fool of glory,
Of heroes bluff und bold;
Of high oldt times akitin,
Of howlin und of tears,
Of kissin and of vightin,
All dis we likes to hears.
Dere growed once dimes in Schwaben,
Since fifty years pegan,
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THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT NEVER APPEARED. 130
Page No 134
An shild of decend elders,
His name Hans Breitemann.
De gross adfentures dat he had,
If you will only look,
Ish all bescribed so truly
In dis forelyin book.
Und allaweil dese lieder
Vere goin troo his het,
De writer lay von Sonntay
ashleepin in his bett;
Vhen, lo! a yellow bigeon
Coom to him in a dream,
De same dat Mr. Barnum
Vonce had in his Museum.
Und dus outshprach de bigeon:
"If you should brint de songs
Or oder dings of Breitmann
Vhich to dem onbelongs,
Dey will tread de road of Sturm and Drang,
Die wile es mohte leben,[75]
Und be misgeborn in pattle
To dis fate ish it ergeben."
Und dus rebly de dreamer:
"If on de ice it shlip,
Denn led id dake ids shanses,
Rip Sam, und let 'er rip!
Dou say'st id vill pe sturmy:
Vot sturmy ish, ish crand,
Crates heroes ish de beoples
In Uncle Samuel's land.
"Du bist ein rechter Gelbschnabel,[76]
O golden bigeon mine,
Und I'll fighdt id on dis summer,
If id dakes me all dis line.
Full liddle ish de discount,
Oopon de Yankee peeps."
"Go to hell!" exglaim de bigeon;
Foreby vas all mine shleeps.
Dere vent to Sout Carolina
A shentleman who dinked,[77]
Dat te pallads of der Breitmann
Should papered pe und inked.
Und dat he vouldt fixed de brintin
Before de writer know:
Dis make to many a brinter,
Fool many a bitter woe.
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Page No 135
All in de down of Charleston,
A druckerei he found,
Where dey cut de copy into takes
Und sorted it around.
Und all vas goot peginnen,
For no man heeded mooch.
Dat half de jours vas Mericans
Und half of dem vas Dutch.
Und vorser shtill, anoder half
Had vorn de Federal plue,
Vhile de antihalf in Davis grey
Had peen Confeterates true.
Great Himmel! vot a shindy
Vas shdarted in de crowd,
Vhen some von read Hans Breitmann,
His Barty all aloud!
Und von gootnadured Yankee,
He schwear id vos a shame,
To dell soosh lies on Dutchmen,
Und make of dem a game.
Boot dis make mad Fritz Luder,
Und he schwear dis treat of Hans,
Vos shoost so goot a barty
Ash any oder man's.
Und dat nodings vas so looscious
In all dis eartly shpeer,
Ash a quart mug fool of sauerkraut,
Mit a plate of lagerbier.
Dat de Yankee might pe tam mit himself,
For he, der Fritz, hafe peen,
In many soosh a barty
Und all dose dings hafe seen.
All mad oopsproong de Yankee,
Mit all his passion ripe;
Und vired at Fritz mit de shootinshtick,
Vheremit he vas fixin type.
It hit him on de occupit,
Und laid him on de floor;
For many a long day afder
I ween his het was sore.
Dis roused Piet Weiser der Pfaelzer,
Who vas quick to act und dink;
He helt in hand a roller
Vheremit he vas rollin ink.
Und he dake his broof py shtrikin
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Der Merican top of his het,
Und make soosh a vine impression,
Dat he left de veller for deat.
Allaweil dese dings oonfolded,
Dere vas rows of anoder kind,
Und drople in de wigwam
Enough to trife dem plind.
Und a crate sixvooted Soudern man
Vot hafe vorked on a Refiew,
Shvear he hope to Gott he mighd pie de forms
If de Breitmann's book warn't true.
For de Sout' vas ploundered derriple,
Und in dat darksome hour
He hafe lossed a yallowpine maiden,
Of all de land de vlower.
Bright gold doublones a hoondered
For her he'd gladly bay
Ash soon ash a thrip for a gingercake,
Und deem it cheap dat day.
To him antworded a Yorker
Who shoomp den dimes de bountiee:
(De only dings he lossed in de war
Was a sense of broperty.)
Says he, "Votefer you hafe dropped
Some oder shap hafe get,
Und de yallowpine liked him petter ash you,
On dat it is safe to bet!"
Dead pale pecame dat Soudern brave,
He tidn't so moosh as yell,
Boot he drop right on to de Yorker,
Und mit von lick bust his shell.
Denn out he flashed his pigsticker,
Und mit looks of drementous gloom,
Rooshed vildly in de pattle
Dat vas ragin round de room.
Boot in angulo, in de corner
Anoder quarrel vas grow
'Twix a Boston shap mit a Londoner;
Und de row ish gekommen so:
De Yankee say dat de Humor
Of soosh writin vas less dan small,
Dough it maket de beoples laughen,
Boot dat vas only all.
Denn a Deutscher say, by Donner!
Dat soosh a baradox
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Page No 137
Vould leafe no hope for writers
In all Pandora's baender box.
'Twas like de sayin dat Heine
Hafe no witz in him goot or bad,
Boot he only kept sayin witty dings
To make beoples pelieve he had.
Denn de oder veller beheaded
Dat dere vas not a shbark of foon
In de pad spelt lieds when you lead dem
Into Englisch correctly done:
Den a Proof Sheet veller respondered,
For he dink de dings vas hard,
"Dat ish shoost like de goot oldt lady
Ash vent to hear Artemus Ward.
"Und say it vas shames de beoples
Vas laugh demselfs most tead
At de boor young veller lecturin,
Vhen he tidn't know vot he said."
Hereauf de Yankee answered,
"Gaul dern it: Shtop your fuss!"
And all de crowd togeder
Go slap in a grand plugmuss.
De Yankee shlog de Proof Sheet
Soosh an awfool smock on de face,
Dat he shvell right oop like a poonkin
Mit a sense of his tisgrace;
Boot der Deutscher boosted an inkkeg
On dop of de oder's hair:
It vly troo de air like a boomshell denn
Mine Gotts! Vot a sighdt vas dere!
Denn ofer all de shapel
Vierce war vas ragin loose;
Fool many a vighten brinter
Got well gegooked his goose.
Fool many a nose mit fisten,
I ween was padly scrouged;
Fool many an eye pright gleamin
Vas ploody outgegouged.
Do wart ufgehouwen,[78]
Dere vas hewin off of pones;
Do horte man darinne
Man heardt soosh treadful croans.
Jach waren da die Geste,
De row vas rough and tough,
Genuoge sluogen wunden
Dere vas plooty wounds enough.
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THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT NEVER APPEARED. 134
Page No 138
De souls of anciend brinters
From Himmel look down oopon,
Und allowed dat in a chapel
Dere was nefer soosh carryins on.
Dere was Lorenz Coster mit Gutemberg,
Und Scheffer mit der Fust,
Und Sweynheim mit Pannartz trop deers,
Oopon dis teufel's dust.
Dere vas Yankee jours extincted
Who lay upon de vloor,
Dere vas Soudern rebs destructed,
Who vouldt nefer Jeff no more.
Ash deir souls rise oop to Heafen,
Dey heardt de oldt brinters' calls,
Und Gutemberg gifed dem all a kick
Ash he histed dem ofer de walls.
Dat ish de vay dese Ballads
Foorst vere crooshed in ploot and shdorm,
Fool many a day moost bass afay
Pefore dey dook dis form.
De copy flootered o'er de preasts
Of heroes lyin todt,
Dis vas de dire peginnin
Das war des Breitmann's Noth.
Dis song in Philadelphia
Long dimes ago pegun,
In Paris vas gondinued, und
In Dresden ist fulldone.
If any toubt apout de facts,
In nople minds ish grew,
Let dem ashk Carl Benson Bristed,
He knows id all ish drue.
Und now, dese Breitmann shdories
In gebrindt in many a lant,
Sogar in far Australia
Dey're gestohlen und bekannt:
"Geh hin mein Puch in alle VVelt
Steh auss was dir kompt zu!
Man beysse Dich, man reysse Dich
Nur dass man mir nichts thu!"[79]
The Breitmann Ballads
THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT NEVER APPEARED. 135
Page No 139
BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS.
BREITMANN IN TURKEY.
DERR BREITMANN hear im Turkenreich
Vas fighten high und low,
"Steh auf, oh Schwackenhammer mein!
It's dime for us to go.
Zieh dein Kanonenstiefel an,
Und schleife Dir das Schwert,
Schon lang her han mer nichts gethan,
Der Weg ist reitenswerth."[80]
"Oopon vitch side? I hartly know
Boot von side in dis war:
Dere ist de holy Russland
All mit a holy Tsar;
But I pe not a holyer,
Nor you von Saint, I fear;
Out line is holy ploonder,
Mit sacred Lagerbier.
"Dere's von Constantinobleman
Vot write to me, und say
He kits me an commission
To make me Breitmann Bey,
Und if I mounts de turpan
Und keeps de Muslin law,
Und bribes ein wenig, den I rise
To Breitemann Pasha.
"Dis much is drue, dat Toorkey is
A real Powder land,
Und if dey're goin' to touch it off,
Vy, ve moost pe on hand.
Und if ve shpring into de airs
Vhile meddlin' in de fuss,
I rader dink some Russian bears
Vill shpring along mit us."
Und ven he kit to Turkreich
Der Breitmann work like mad,
Und kit ein corps togeder,
Mein Gott! vat men he had!
Mit Polers und mit Shipsies,
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BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS. 136
Page No 140
Ungaren, Turks, und such,
Und allerlei Gesindel. "Hei!"
Says Hans: "dis beats de Dutch!"
Den onwards to his Schicksal[81]
Und forvarts troo de night,
Und oopwarts to his mission,
Und downvarts in de vight.
Until in de Bulgaren
Von night his horse he strode,
Und meet a tausand Kossacks
Pefore him on de road.
Slap forward rode der Breitmann
Right on de Kossack spears,
But forvarts coom deir leader
And halted his careers,
Und gry, "O Turkisch Ritter,
I am de Capitan,
And if you want a shindy,
Step up, and I'm your man."
Dey fightet like der teufel,
Dey fightet mit deir swords,
Und Breitmann vould hafe kilt him,
But 'twas not on de cards,
For de Kossack fire a bistol
As his retreadt pegan,
Down from his horse all senseless
Flop! went der Breitemann.
Vhen he hafe kit his senses,
Der Breitmann find he lay
Insite a nople castell,
Upon a canape;
Und py his side a lady
So wunderschon to see,
Vas shlisin oop a lemon
Indo a cop of thee.
Den to himself say Breitmann,
Aldough he hold his jaw,
"Dis is de vinest womans,
Py Gott! I efer saw.
Vot lofeliness! vot muscle!
Mit efery himmlisch charm!
She measures twenty inches,
Bei Donner! roundt de arm."
De lady see his glances
So noble und so game,
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BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS. 137
Page No 141
Und yust as he reflected
She dink of him de same,
Und she say, "Wie gehts?" in English,
"Du galiant cavalier,
Who art pecome de captive
All of my bow und spear.
"I am a gal dis mornin',
Yestreen I vas a knight,
Old hoss you nearly smashedme,
I guess, in that small fight;
And if I hadn't shot you
I think I should have ran."
"Gottshimmel mit Potzbomben!
Egsclaim der Breitemann.
"But say, O nople lady,
Vot got you in dot set
Of plackgards vilt dou dell me?"
De dame rebly: "You bet!
My father came from Boston,
And when this war began
He got a splendid contract,
All with the Russian,
"To sell the army shoestrings;
But I have read of fights,
And I dream of war and glory,
For I go for women's rights;
Then I read a book of poems
Which fairly turned my head,
The ballads of Hans Breitmann"
"Oh ho!" Hans Breitmann said.
"And as I think the Breitmann
Must be the greatest man
Who ever went afighting
Since History began,
I dressed me like a soldier,
For I am stark of limb;
With Breitmann for a model,
And try to act like him.
"Oh, tell me, noble captive,
While rolling in this storm
Which men call life, hast ever
Beheld Hans Breitmann's form?
Oh, could I once embrace him,
And gaze into his eye,
And feel his arms around me,
Then I would gladly die.
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BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS. 138
Page No 142
"He is the man of mortals,
The Odin of them all,
A higher Incarnation,
The 'Menschheitsideal,'[82]
A being made to worship,
To me an earthly Gott"
"Py shings!" exglaim Hans Breitmann,
"Dis ding is gettin hot!
"O laity! nople gountess!
Dis man of whom you dink
Ish lyin' here pefore you,
Half tead for want of trink,
Likewise for lofe of you, too,
Done up mit lofe and durst,
Und mit de two togeder,
I don't know vitch is vorst.
"And dou canst safe dy hero
From bitter Todespein,
If dou hast in de Keller
Only one Fass of wein.
Nay, doubt not in my pocket
Is dot vitch brofes de man,
My bassport, und drei tavern bills
Against der Breitemann."
De laity she emprace him
Oontil he nearly bust.
"Potzblitz!" gasp out der Breitmann,
"She is a squeezer yust!"
De dame she vas vealty,
Likewise an orphan too,
Mit a castel und a titel,
So Breitmann put it troo.
So soon the paar vere marrit,
Hei! vot a dimes dey had!
Hei! how dey life togeder
So clorious und clad!
Now he has cot a titel
Dot was a Capitan;
Hier hat de tale ein Ende
Of Herr Count Breitemann.
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BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS. 139
Page No 143
COBUS HAGELSTEIN.
ICH bin ein Deutscher, und mein name is Cobus Hagelstein,[83]
I coom from Cincinnati, and I life peyond der Rhein;
Und I dells you all a shdory dot makes me mad ash blitz,
Pout how a Yankee gompany vas shvindle me to fits.
I heardt apout dis gompany, und vished to see dot same,
Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft vos ids name;
Dot is de name in Sherman in English it will say
Dot it insures your life mit fire, ven you de money pay.
Now, I hod a liddle houseline vhere I life so shtill ash mice,
Und yoost drei tausand dollar vos dot little pilding's brice;
I vos always yoost so happy ash ein Kaisar in de land
Dill at last I kit in drople, for mein haus vas abgebrannt.
Den I goes undo dot gompany und dells em right afay
(Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft), und I say,
"At last de youngest day ist coom for you to plank de cash,
And you moost bay me monies, for mine haus is purned to ash."
Den de segredary answered, "All dis is fery drue,
Boot you know ve have de option to pild your house anew;
Dere ist a lot of beoples vot burns deir hauser doun,
Den coom to kit de money pack all over in de toun."
I look indo de bapers und I find it ash he say,
Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft need not bay;
So I dells em all to go ahet und pild anoder shdore,
Und dey make me von in Yankee shdyle more petter ash pefore.
Den I met der segredary dereafter on a day,
Of Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft, und he say,
"You've found oos vellers honoraple und honest in our line,
Vy tont you go insure de life of Madame Hagelstein?"
I poots mine dum oopon mine nose, and vinks him mit mine eye,
Und says I cooms to do it ven de ocean runs dry,
Ven gooses turn to ganders, und de bigs kits shanged to shvine;
Oh, den I makes insure de life of Madame Hagelstein.
"I haf dried you on insurance, ash you know, yust vonce pefore,
Und ven mein haus vas abgebrannt you pild anoder shdore;
Id's drue you pild it goot enough, boot I dell you allaweil,
I vas liket id moosh petter if it vas in Sharman shdyle.
"Now, if I goes insure my wife anoder dime mit you
Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft, I knows vot it would do,
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COBUS HAGELSTEIN. 140
Page No 144
If from dis vorldt Frau Hagelstein should rise to Himmel life,
Inshtead of paying gelt you'd kit for me a Yankee vife!"
I poots mine dum pelow mine eye, und vinks him merrily,
Und say, "Go find soom Deutscherman dot is more creen ash me.
Dere's blendy of dem creen enough, I know, peyond der Rhein,
But none among dem wears de name of Cobus Hagelstein."
FRITZERL SCHNALL.
A BALLAD.
ASH on de Alapama biz,
Deep sinnin long I sat,
I dinks von ding for dinkin
Py afery Diplomat;
Und dat ist: dat voll many a ding
Vot ist de facto done,
May pe de jure unbossible,
Und officiel unknown,
Von dimes in San Franciscus,
Im Californian land,
Among de Californaments
Dere woned a Deutscher band;
Und shief among dese heroes
Dere shone Herr Fritzerl Schnall,
Who nefer vouldt pelief in nichts
Dat vas not logical.
Vell den: von tay as Fritzerl
Vas valk Dolores Shtreet,
Mein Gott! how he vas overrush
Ein gut oldt friendt to meet;
Hans Liederschnitz aus Augsburg,
Vot professed in Bayrisch bier
"Gottskreuz! du alter Schlingel!"
Cried Fritz: "Was mochst du hier?"
Now in des dimes I scribe of,
Dree ways der vere bakannt,
Und only dree, to get to
Das Californigen Landt.
De virst de Plains coom ofer;
De next, de Istmoos troo;
De dird aroundt Cape Horne,
All ofer de ocean plue.
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FRITZERL SCHNALL. 141
Page No 145
But de first lot of surveyors
For de railroad overland,
Vas seek a new vay northwarts,
All for de Eisenbahn,
Und mit dem, der professor
Of Lager vent along;
So he kommed to San Franciscus,
Und den into dis song.
But ash unto Herr Fritzerl
Dis news vas unerheard,
He couldt not know de tidings
Wherevon he had no vord;
Und derefore dis here quesdion
He makes to Hans: "Old hoss,
I kess de vay you kit hier,
You kommed de Blains agross?"
"Nein, nein," sayt Liederschnitzerl;
"I komm not ash you say."
"Vell, den," antworded Fritzerl,
"It pe's anoder vay.
If you komm de Blains not uber,
I see vot you hafe do:
You make an longer umway
Und gross de Istmoos troo."
"Nein, nein," acain saidt Schnitzerl,
"Dat road I nefer know,
Und vas not ride de Istmoose!"
Cried Fritz, erstaunisched, "SO
You komm de Blains not uber,
Nor gross de Istmoose troo?
Vell, den to make de Horn aroundt
Vas all dat you could do!"
"I shvears py Gott!" says Schnitzerl,
"So sure as you vas porn,
Exshept oopon some ochsen
I nefer saw a horn.
Dat ish mitwiles, too whileen
I hafe von in mine hand,
Und trink to dy Gesundheit,
Im lieben Vaterland."
Erstaunished stoot der Fritzerl:
No wort herout brought he:
Und sinned, und sinned den sighftserd.
"Potz blitz! how vash dis pe?"
Ontill a light from Himmel
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FRITZERL SCHNALL. 142
Page No 146
Vlash down into him shtraight,
Ash Heafen in Yacob Bohme
Vlash from a bewter blate.
Den laut he cry, eyeshbarklin,
Ash droonk mit Truth tifine,
Like der Wahrheitseher Novalis:
"Herr Gott! es leuch't mir ein!
If you komm de Blains not over,
Nor py Horn, nor py canal,
Den I shwears you dis, Hans Schnitzerl,
Du bist not here at all!"
MORAL.
Go in for Wahrheit,
Und for Pure Reason seek;
If it land you in a poghole,
Den die dere like a brick!
Gott brosber all logikers,
Und pless deir nople breed;
Und so ist komm zu ende
Dis Breitmanns letzte Lied.
THE GYPSY LOVER.
DOT vos a schwartz Zigeuner[84]
Dot on a viddle played,
Und oonderneat' a fenster
He mak't a serenade.
Dot vos a lofely gountess
Who heardt de gypsy blay'n.
Said she, "Who make dot musik
Vot sound so wunderscheen?"
Dot vos de schwartz Zigainer
Who vos fery quick to twig;
Und he song a mournvoll pallad
How his hearts vos proken big!
Dot vos de lofely gountess
Said, "Dell me who you are?"
He saidt, "Mein name is Janosch,
De Lord of Temesvar."
Dot vos de lofely gountess
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THE GYPSY LOVER. 143
Page No 147
Said, "Come more near to me,
I vants to dalk on piz'ness:
I'll trow you down de key."
Dot vos de moon kept lightin'
De gountess in her room,
Boot somedings moost have vrighten
De minstrel tid not coom.
Dot vos a treadfool oudgry
Ven early in de morn
Dey foundt de hens vos missin,
Und all de wash vos gone!
Dot vos a schwartz Zigeuner
Vot sot oopon de dirt
Aeatin roasted schickens
All in a new glean shirt.
DORNENLIEDER.
I.
FOR efery Rose dot ploome in spring,
Dey say an maid is porn;
For efery pain dot Rose vill make
Dey say dere comes a dorn.
Boot let dem say yoost vot dey will,
Dis ding I will soopose,
I'll immer prick mein finger still,
If I may pfluck die Ros'.
Ach, Rosalein, du schone mein,[85]
Dot man vas nefer born
Vot did deserfe to win de Rose,
Vot couldt not stand de Dorn.
Blutfarbig ist die schone Ros',[86]
Und dot ist yoost a sign
Dot I moost lose a liddle Blut
To make de Rose mein.
Wer Rosen bricht die Finger sticht;
Das ist mir ganz egal,
Der bricht sie auch in Winter nicht,
Und kits no Rose at all.
Was wir hier treiben und kosen, love,
De joy or misery,
Soll bleiben unter der Rosen, love!
The Breitmann Ballads
DORNENLIEDER. 144
Page No 148
Und our own secret pe![87]
II.
Von Dorn ride out in hoonting gear,
Mit his horse und his Hunde too,
Und his mutter she say,
"Bring home a deer,
Mein Sohn, votefer you do!"
"You know, gewiss, dot I nefer miss,
Und ven you hear mine horn,
Pe sure dot a deer is comin' here,"
Said der Ritter Veit von Dorn,
Mit his deer so fein, tra la la la!
Mit his deer so fine, tra le!
Tra la la tra la la la!
Tra la la la la le!
Von Dorn he ridet im greenen wood
Till dere, peneat a dree,
He sah a maid wie Milch und Blut.
As fair ash a maid could pe.
Und der Ritter he spies her great plack eyes,
"Id's petter, I'll pe shwore,
To hafe a dear oopon two feet
Dan von dot roons on four.
Mit a deer so fein, tra la la la!
Mit a deer so fine, tra le!
Tra la la tra la la la!
Tra la la la de le!
Der Ritter ridet pack to home:
"Ach, mutter all ist goot;
I prings you here de finest dear
In all de greene woot."
De mutter she looks, mit joy surprise,
"Hast Recht, mein lieber Sohn;[88]
Dere vas nefer a deer vot hafe soosh eyes
Ash de dear vot you hafe won!"
Mit her eyes so plack, tra la, la la!
Mit her eyes so plack, tra le!
Tra, la, la tra la, la, la!
Tra la la la de le!
Nota bene. Dis song moost pe sung mit exbression.
FRITZ SCHWACKENHAMMER
[Redaktor].
The Breitmann Ballads
DORNENLIEDER. 145
Page No 149
BREITMANN'S SLEIGHRIDE.
VEN de winter make oos shifer
Und de bonds is froze mit ice,
To shlide und shkate on de rifer,
Mit de poys und gals is nice.
Ven de horses hafe deir bits on,
Und de roats pe vite mit shnow,
To vly in a sleigh like blitzen
Is de yolliest dings I know.
"Und its high, hooray!" saidt Breitmann
"For de gals on de Dutchtownside;
Und it's lebe hoch! for de yunglins,
Vot'll go mit de gals to ride;
Und it's hip, herje! for de drifers
Vot nefer dake no odds!
Und it's vivat! for de vellers,
Vot'll shtand de appletods!"
Der Breitmann pooled his mits on,
Der Breitmann crocked his vip,
"Now its fly like dunner blitzen,
Mein shildren, let 'er rip!
Like de eagles on de shtormcloudt
Avlyin' to deir nest;
Dere is oppleyack avaitin
For de von dot times de rest.
"Oh mein Rapp, du bist de pestest
Of horses in de land!
Dou canst trafel on de grafel,
Und canst shell it on de sand!
Oh Rapp! dere's money on id,
Ton't let de Gelt go blue!
I vants you show de beoples
Dis tay vot you can do!"
Der Breitman mit his madchen
Vas in a shblentit shleigh,
Fritz Laufer mit his Mina,
Vas yoosht agross de vay;
Mit popslets und mit yoompers,
Mit horses and mit mules,
Dere vas more ash vifty fellers
Come mit deir vehicules.
Id's "EinZweiDrei!" togedder
Dey hollered klein und gross,
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BREITMANN'S SLEIGHRIDE. 146
Page No 150
Like de wind in shtormy wetter,
Stracks vent de Deutschers los!
Dey crock de vips like mooskets,
Dey ring from berg to berg,
"Hooray!" exsglaim Hans Breitmann:
"Dot sounds like Gettysburg!"
Der Breitmann und der Laufer
Vere half a mile ahet,
For ven id coom to driven,
De oder Dootch vere deadt.
Dey vly like teufel's arrows,
Mit imps oopon em gay,
Dey killt five hoondred shbarrows
Vot kit indo de vay.
Dey vly like rats und blitzen,
De fery gals vos doomb,
Und Breitmann kept his wits on,
To see vot shanse vouldt coom;
He know'd de pace dey clipped it
Moost enden in a shquall
By de vay der Laufer ripped it,
Und de shteeds vere ganz egal.
Der Laufer he vos leadin'
Hans Breitmann ash he goed,
Boot he tidn't see a soplin'
Dot vos lyin' in de road.
Id yank dem out like marples,
Mitout a will or shall;
Hets downvarts in a shnowpank,
Vent Laufer mit his gal.
Und ash Breitmann comed oonto it
Id kit indo his vay,
Und tossed him mit his madchen
Right indo Laufer's shleigh;
Hans crab de reins like blitze',
Und go ahet like sin:
"Adje, mein lieber Fritze![89]
Dis dimes I scoop you in!"
He vly avay like shvallows
To vhere a davern lay,
Vhere de oppletod vos ploomin'
Among de Deutschers gay.
Der Breitmann as he vonisht
Yoost cast von look pehind,
At de lecks of Fritz und Mina
Avafin in de wind.
The Breitmann Ballads
BREITMANN'S SLEIGHRIDE. 147
Page No 151
Homburg vor der Hohe, HesseNassau,
September 1, 1888.
THE MAGIC SHOES.
IT was stiller, dimmer twilight amber toornin' into gold,
Like young maidens' hairs get yellow und more dark as dey crow old;
Und dere shtood a high ruine vhere de Donau rooshed along,
All lofely, yet neclected like an oldt und silent song.
Out shpoke der Ritter Breitmann, "Ven I hafe not forgot,
Ich kenn an anciendt shtory of dis inderesdin shpot,
Of the Deutscher Middleolter vot de Minnesingers sung,
Ven dot olt ruine oben vas abloomin, fair, und yung.
"Vonce dere lifed a noble fraulein fery peautiful vas she,
More ash twendy dimes goot lookin it is in de historie;
Und mit more ash forty quarters on her woppenshield,[90] dot men
Might beholdt mitout a discount she vas of de upper ten.
"But dough lofely as an angel, mit eyes of turkos plue,
She vas cruel ash a teufel, und de vorst man efer knew.
Vonce ven a nople young one kneeled down to her mit lofe,
She kicket him mit her slipper und oopset him on de shtove.
"Und said, 'I do refuse you, as you may plainly see;
Und from dis day henseforvart mine refuse you shall pe,
Und when I do run afder you like dogs run afder men,
Den I vill pe your vife, yung man boot keep avay dill denn!'
"He lishten to her crimly, and no single vort he said,
Boot de bitter dings she spoken poot der teufel in his head;
For she hafe not learned de visdom, vich is alvays safe and sound,
'Don't go to pourin' water on a mouse ven id ist trowned.'
"Vonce, at de end of autoom, ven de vind vos bitter cold,
Dis maiden out aridin' met a voman poor and old;
Her feets vere bare and pleedin', and she said, 'Ah! ton't refuse
To gife me, nople lady, yoosht de vorst of your oldt shoes!'
"De lady boorst out laughin', 'Fool here, or fool me dere,
You give to me a couple, I gives to you a pair.'
Denn she rode avay alaughin'; de old voman says 'I wete,
I'll give you shoes, my lady, dot vill fit your soul and feet!'
"Dis voman vas a vitche, an bitter one dere to,
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THE MAGIC SHOES. 148
Page No 152
All dot vot she had shpoken she light enough could do;
De Ritter did not know it, but he told her of his love,
And how dot shkornful lady hat oopset him mit de shtove.
"Out spoke de grimme witche, 'She shall pay dee well to boot,
If yo pring to me de measure of dat lady's liddle foot.'
He got it from her shoemaker, and gafe id to de vitch,
Denn she gafe it to de damsel pooty soon as hot as pitch.
"Von morn de lofely lady, on openin' her toor,
Found de nicest pair of gaiter boots she efer saw pefore;
Dey vitted her exoctly mitouten any doubt
Boot, mein Gott! how she vas shrocken ven dey 'gun to valk apout!
"Und ash de poots go valkin', like de buds go mit de stem,
It vollowed dot de lady had to valk apout in dem.
Dey took her out into de street dey run her on de road,
Bymby she saw a man ahead vot led her vhere she goed.
"Vhen he vent valkin' longsome denn longsome vas her pace,
Vhen he roon like a greyhound she skompered in a race;
He led her o'er de moundains und cross de lonely plain,
Until de evenin' shadows, ven he took her home again.
"Denn she dink mit hate and fury of dis man she used to skoff,
Und den go at de gaiters boot she couldn't pull dem off,
She vork mit all de servants, boot 'tvasent any use,
Und so she hafe to go to bett ashleepin' in her shoes.
"Next mornin' off dey shtarted, apout de broke of day,
Den he led her to a castle in de woods and far away,
And shpeak to her, 'My lady I dink at last you see
Dat de dime has come in earnesdt vhen you've cot to vollow me!'
"Oh vat ish female nature? Oh vat ish mortal pride?
How all dot shtands de firmest most quickly shlips aside
De cloudts dot o'er de moundains look shkornful at de plain,
Ere long mit shtormy wetter come toomble down in rain.
"So de stormcloud of Superbia vhich shweep her soul above,
Vas meltet mit his shternness and beturned into love,
As his words like donner wetter croshed ven de lightnin' flies,
So downward coom de torrents of dear trops from her eyes.
"Und she gry, 'Mit shame I own it, to say de fery least,
I gonfess dat in dis matter I hafe acted like a peast;
Ven I made of you my refuse, I dinked it no account,
But now de pack is on my back it seems a big amount.
"'But if you vish to ved me, I vill do vat you require.
He answered, 'Now you're talkin' dot is yoost vot I tesire,
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THE MAGIC SHOES. 149
Page No 153
For I am very willin', and you do not refuse,
Boot remember vot you bromised send de vitch a pair of shoes!'
"She answered, 'I vill follow verever you may go,
All ofer hills and falleys, in sunshine, rain, or schnow,
All over in der Welt, dear, I'll vander on vith thee,
I do not care how rough de road or dark de path may be!
"'Or in de bloomin' meadows, vhere de grass is soft and sweet,
Or in de rocky passes, vhere de stones are under veet,
Or if I vear de shoes, love, vitch you hafe given me,
Or if I moost go barefoot, is all de same to me.'
"He drew away de gaiters. She said, 'As I'm rich
I vill fill dem both mit money, and take dem to de vitch.'
Ja wohl, she saw die Hexe, and takin' her aside,
She danked her for de lesson vot hat dook avay her pride.
"On de vay vhen dey vere married, how vere dey all erstaun
To see a lofely lady come in mit golden crown,
All in a rosysilken dress vot shined as pright as glass,
Said, 'My dears, I am de vitch dot fetch dis ding to pass.
"'You know I look so ogly vonce, und now am peautiful,
Dot ist de vay dot all dings vork ven folks pe dutiful.
Ash de lily toorns to vhitey vot once vas dirty green,
So all ist fair ven virdue ist runnin' de machine.'"
Dis is de vondrous shtory vot de Ritter Breitmann told
Besides the rooshin' Danube of de schloss so grey und old,
Vhile a shmokin' of his meerschaum; und till all time pe gone
The rustlin' of de vasser tells de tale for ever on.
Dat is an alt legende, und yet 'tis efer new,
Und to efery von dot hears it it fits yoost like a shoe.
Und dis de shinin' moral dot in de oyster lies
Some day you may roon after de dings you vonce despise!
Vienna, 1888.
Glossary
THIS Glossary was prepared entirely by Mr. NICHOLAS TRUBNER. I
am not aware that he had any assistance in writing it. I mention
this because I have never met with any person who was so equally
familiar with obscure and obsolete old German facetious
literature (as the text indicates), and at the same time with
Americanisms. I should say that in all of the later ballads, or
at least in fully one half of all in the book, the author was
indebted to him for ideas, suggestions, and emendations, and that
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THE MAGIC SHOES. 150
Page No 154
the work would never have been what it is sit verbo venia but
for him. Mr. Trubner was a poet, even in English, as his
translation from Scheffel's poems indicates. A very few words
have been added to explain the poems in the ballads which appear
for the first time in this edition.
CHARLES G. LELAND.
GLOSSARY
Abenddammerung,(Ger.) Evening dim light; twilight.
Abendgold,(Ger.) Evening gold.
Abendroth,(Ger.) Evening red.
Abendsonnenschein,(Ger.) Evening sunshine.
Abbordezmoi vodre mere,(GermanFrench) Bring me your mayor.
Ach weh,(Ger.) Oh, woe.
Allatag,(Ger. dial.) Every day.
Alla weil All the while; always.
Allegader All together.
Alles wird ewig zu eins,(Ger.) And all for ever becomes one.
Alter Schwed',(old Swede) A familiar phrase like "old fellow."
Anamile,(Amer.) Animal.
Annerthalb Yar, Anderthalb Jahr,(Ger.) Year and a half.
Anti Word: Antwort Answer.
Antworded,(Ger.) Answered.
Appletod,(Amer.) Apple toddy. Spirit distilled from cider.
Arbeiterhalle Workingman's hall.
Arminius,(Herman.) The Duke of the Cheruskans, and destroyer of
the Roman legions under Varus, in the Teutoburg Forest.
Armlos Unarmed.
Aroom, Herum Around.
Arriere pensee,(Fr.) A reserved thought or intention.
Aufgespannt,(Ger.) Stretched, bent.
Augen,(Ger.) Eyes.
Augenblick,(Ger.) Twinkling of an eye.
Aus,(Ger.) Out.
Bach,(Ger.) Book.
Baenderbox Bandbox.
Baldface corn,(Amer.) Plain maize whisky.
Barellhell pars Parallelbars; a part of the gymnastic
apparatus.
Barrick,(Pennsylvania Ger. for Berg) Mountain.
Bauern,(Ger.) Peasants.
Beghostet,(Ger. Begeistert) Inspired.
Begifted, Beschenkt Gifted.
Begreifen,(Ger.) Understand.
Beheaded, Behauptet,(Ger.) Asserted.
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Bei Leib und Leben,(Ger.) By my body and soul.
Bekannt, Beknown Known.
Bellin,(Ger. Bellen) To bark.
Bemarket,(Ger.Eng.) Remarked.
Bemark,(Ger. Bemarken) Observe.
Bemarks,(Ger. Bemerkungen) Remarks.
Bemerkbar,(Ger.) Observable. Should be noticed.
Bemoost,(Ger.) Mossgrown, in student's language, ein bemoostes
Haupt, an old student.
Bender,(Amer.) A spree; a frolic. To "go on a bender"
to go on a spree.
Beraised Raised, with the augment, literal for Ger. erhoben.
Berauscht,(Ger.) Intoxicated.
Besoffen,(Ger.) Drunk.
Bestimmung des Menschen Vocation of Man, title of one
of Fichte's works.
Betaubend,(Ger.) Enchanting.
Bewises,(Ger. Beweist, from Beweisen) Proves.
Bibliothek Library.
Bienenkorb,(Ger.) Beehive.
Birra gazzosa,(Italian) Aerated, gaseous beer.
Bischof,(Ger.) Bishop.
Bix Buchse,(box) Rifle. Bess in Brown Bess is the equivalent
of the German Buchse, (Brown being merely an alliterative
epithet;) French, buse tube; Flemish, buis. (Still
found in blunderbuss, arquebuss.) See Blackley's "Word Gossip."
Blaetter,(Ger.) Leaves.
Blei Lead.
Blitz,(Ger.) Lightning.
Blitzen,(Ger.) Lightning.
Blokes,(English) Men.
Bock A strong kind of German beer.
Boemisch Bohemian.
Boerenvolk,(Flem.) Peasants.
Bole Jack road Near Murfreesboro, Tennessee.
Bool Bull.
Bornirtheit Limitedness of capacity.
Bouleverse Boulevard.
Bountiee,(Amer.) Bountymoney paid during the war as a premium
to soldiers. To jump the bounty, was to secure the premium and
then run away.
"This is the song of Billy Jones,
Who jumped the bountiee."
American Ballad of 1846.
Bowery A street at New York, inhabited principally by Germans.
Branntewein,(Ger.) Spirits.
Brandy smash,(Amer.) A plain halfglass mint julep of only
sugar,ice, spirits, and mint. A regular julep is larger, and
contains more ingredients.
Brav,(Ger.) Good.
Breit,(Ger.) Broad.
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GLOSSARY 152
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Bring it down to dots Reduce it to figures.
Brisner Prisoner.
Brooshpinder Brushbinder,(Ger. Buerstenbinder.)
Brushmaker. The brushmakers are supposed, probably on account
of their throatparching business, to be always thirsty.
Brummed growled (Ger. Brummen).
Brucke,(Ger.) Bridge.
Bugs In America all insects, especially Coleoptera.
Bummer,(Amer.) A fellow haunting low taverns; applied during
the late civil war in the United States to hangerson of the
army. Probably a corruption of the German bummler(loafer).
Bumming From Bummer.
Bushwhackers Guerillas.
Bust his shell Broke his head.
Butterbrod,(Ger.) Buttered bread.
ByNearly; Beinahe Almost, nearly.
Came Game.
Camine Chimneypiece.
Canyon,(Span. Canon) A narrow passage between high and
precipitous banks, formed by mountains or tablelands, often
with a river running beneath. These occur in the great Western
prairies, New Mexico, and California.
Carmagnole A wild street dance.
Carmosine,(Ger.) Crimson. French, cramoisoi.
Carnadine Incarnadine.
Change their lodge Shift from one "society" to another.
Chroc, Chrocus, Crocus An Alemannic leader, who overran Gaul,
according to Gregory of Tours.
Chunk A short thick piece of wood, or of anything else; a chump.
The word is provincial in England, and colloquial in the United
States.
Cinder Suende; sin.
Clam The popular name of a bivalvular shellfish, the Venus.
Clavier,(Ger.) Piano.
Colle belle,(Ital.) With the beauties.
Comedy Committee.
Conradin The last of the imperial house of the Hohenstaufen
beheaded at Naples in 1268.
Coot (To cut) a dash, (to come out a "swell,")
to dress extravagantly.
Corned,(Amer.) Made drunk.
Coster The inventor of the art of printing, according
to the Dutch.
Crate Great.
Crecian pend When Breitmann says "Dat pend of the bow ish
the Crecian pend," it is a rather eqivocal compliment.
"Grecian bend" has lately become a common newspaper
expression. Smuggling done by women is called a "Case of
Grecian bend." The present style of skirt, full at the back,
is favourable to it.
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GLOSSARY 153
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Crislies Grisly,(bear.)
Da ist er! Schau! There he is! look!
Damit,(Ger.) Therewith.
Dampfschiff Steamboat.
Deck A pack of cards, piled one upon another.
Demperanceler, Temperenzler Temperance man.
Dessauerinn A woman from Dessau.
Deutschland Germany.
Die Hexe The witch.
Die wile as mohte leben During all its life.
Daz wolde er immer dienen
Die wile es mohte leben.
Kutrun. XV. Aventiure, 756th verse.
Dink he, they think; my dinks my thoughts.
Dinked he, they thought.
Dishtriputet Instead of attributed.
Dissembulatin' Dissembling.
Dissolfed Instead of resolved.
D'lusion Instead of allusion.
Donnered,(Ger.) Thundered.
Donnerwetter,(Ger.) Thunder and lightning.
Dooks Ducks.
Doon Tune.
Doonderblix Thunder and lightning.
Dorn A thorn. Dorn lieder Thornsongs.
Drawed he in (literal rendering of the German Zog er ein,)
Dreimal,(Ger.) Three times.
Drocks Drakes, dragons; (Ger. Drachen.)
Druckerei Printingoffice.
Dummehrlichkeit,(Ger.) Honest simplicity.
Dunkelheit Darkness.
Dursty,(Ger. Durstig) Thirsty.
Earnsthaft, ernsthaft Serious.
Eber,(Ger.) Wild boar.
Eberschwein,(Ger.) Wild boar.
Eckhartshausen A German supernaturalist.
Eher,(Ger.) Sooner. In the dialect it has the meaning
of "before."
Einander to sprechen mit,(Ger.) To speak together.
Eins, zwei, drei One, two, three.
Einsichen, to take up one's abode with.
Eldern,(Ger. Eltern) Parents.
Elfenbein,(Ger.) Ivory.
Emerich King Emerich, hero of a German legend.
Emsig Gruebler,(Ger.) Assiduous inquirer.
Engel,(Ger.) Angel.
Englandrinn,(Ger.) English woman.
Entlang,(Ger.) Along.
Erfinder,(Ger.) Inventor.
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Page No 158
Erfounden,(Ger. Erfunden) Invented.
Ergeben,(Ger.) Resigned.
Errordom, Irrthum Error.
Erstaun, Erstaunished, erstaunt Astonished.
Erstarrt,(Ger.) Aghast.
Erwaitin',(Ger. Erwartend) Awaiting, expecting.
Euchre, Eucre Sort of game played with cards, very much in vogue
in the West.
Euchred From Euchre, the game of cards.
Fackeltantz,(Ger.) Torch dance.
Fancy craps or crabs Fast horses.
Fanes, Wetterfahnen Weathercocks.
Fass,(Ger.) Barrel.
Fat Printer's term.
Feldwebel,(Ger.) A sergeant.
Feinslieb,(Ger.) Fair or fine love.
Fenster A window.
Fichte A German philosopher.
Finster,(Ger.) Dark, dismal.
Foal Full.
Foll To fall.
Foon Fun.
Foors First.
Foreby Literal translation of the German Vorbei.
Forelying Literal translation of Vorliegend.
Foreschlag,(Ger. Vorschlag) Proposal.
Foresetzen To set, put (lay) before an audience.
Foxen,(Ger. Fuchsen) Foxes.
Franktiroir Franctireur.
Francois Villon An old French humorous poet, whom Boileau
speaks of as the first who began to write truly modern French.
Frau,(Ger.) Woman.
Freie,(Ger.) Free.
Freischarlinger,(Ger. Freischaerler) A member of a Free Corps;
especially applied to those who belonged to the Free Corps
formed in Southern Germany during the Revolution in 1848.
Freischuetz,(Ger.) Free shot, one who shoots with charmed
bullets, the name of Karl Maria Von Weber's celebrated opera.
Friederich Rothbart Frederic Barbarossa, the great Emperor of
Germany and one of the German legendary heroes. He is supposed
to sleep in the Kyffhauser in Thuringia, and to awaken one day,
when he will bring great glory over Germany.
Frolic Frohlich, merry.
Froze to de ready Held fast to the money.
Fullenden Vollenden To complete, perfect.
Fuss,(Ger.) Foot.
Fust or Faust The partner of Gutemberg, the inventor of the
art of printing.
Gambrinus A mythical King of Brabant, supposed to have been
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GLOSSARY 155
Page No 159
the inventor of beer.
Gandertate Candidate.
Ganz,(Ger.) Ganz.
Gans egal Quite the same.
Ganz und gar,(Ger.) Altogether, all over.
Garce,(French) Wench.
Gass und Strass,(Ger.) Lane and street.
Gast,(Ger.) Guest.
Gasbalgs Bladder of gas.
Gauer Valleys.
Gaul darn G n.
Gaul dern A Yankee oath.
Gaunersprache,(Ger.) Thieves' language.
Gebildet Built, with the German augment.
Gebirt',(Ger. Geburt) Birth.
Geborn Born, with the augment.
Gebrudert,(formed like geschwister,) Brothers.
Geh hin mein Puch,(German of the 16th century).
Gehst nit mit rechten Dingen zu Dost not do it by any natural
means; there is witchcraft in it.
Gekommene Arrived(newly arrived).
Gekommen so,(Ger.) Come thus.
Gekostet Cost, with the German augment.)
Gesangverein,(Ger.) Singingsociety.
Gescreech, Geschrei Bawling, clamour.
Gesembled Assembled, with the augment of the German preterite.
Geshmasht Smashed, with German augment.
Gespickt,(Ger.) Larded.
Gestohlen Stolen.
Gestohlen und bekannt,(Ger.) Stolen, and known.
Gesundheit,(Ger.) Health.
Gewehr,(Ger.) Musket.
Gewiss Certainly.
Gift,(Ger.) Poison.
Gilt In the ordinary sense, and also in the same verse, "gilt,"
implying the meaning of the German verb "gelten," to be worth
something, and also guilt.
Glamour Ocular deception by magic.
Gleewine, Gluehwein Hotspiced wine.
Glucky,(Ger. Gluecklich) Lucky.
Glueck,(Ger.) Luck.
Goblum For goblin.
Gool Cool.
Gottallmachty, (Ger. Gottallmachtig) God Almighty.
Gottashe Cottage.
Gotteshaus,(Ger.) House of God.
Gottfull, gottvoll Glorious, divine.
Gottsdonnerkreuzschockschwerenoth,(Ger.) Another variety of big
swearing.
Gott'sdoonder,(Ger. Gott's donner) God's thunder. See also
Gott's tausend, a thundering sort of oath, but never preceded
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GLOSSARY 156
Page No 160
by lightning, for it is only used as a kind of expletive to
express great surprise, or to give great emphasis to words
which, without it, would seem to be capable of none.
Gottstausend,(Ger.) An abbreviation of Gott's tausend
donnerwetter (God's thousand thunders), and therefore the
comparative of Gott's doonder; with most of those who use it a
meaningless phrase.
Gott weiss,(Ger.) God knows!
Go von Go one, bet on him.
Grillers Guerillas.
Grod, gerad Straight.
Gros,(Ger.) Great.
Guestfriendlich, gastfreundlich Hospitable.
Gummi lasticum India rubber.
Gutemberg The inventor of the art of printing.
Guve Southern slang for give. Guv, for give, is also
English slang as well as American.
Gyrotwistive Snaky.
Hab' und Guter,(Ger.) Property.
Hagel! Blitz! Kreuz Sakrament!(Ger.) Another variety of swearing.
Halberthier, for Halberdier Halberthier means half an animal.
Handshoe,(Ger. Handschuh) Glove.
Hans Michel A popular but not complimentary name for Germany.
Hans Wurst Merry Andrew; Zani; Jack Pudding the latter word
being a literal translation of the German Hans Wurst; the
pudding in either case referring to the sausages, or the
pretended sausage, which the Merry Andrew always appeared to
be swallowing by the yard or fathom. See Blackley's "Word
Gossip."
Harmlos,(Ger.) Harmless.
Haul de pot Take the stakes.
Hause House.
Hegel Name of the German philosopher.
Heine, Heinrich German poet.
Heini von Steier Heinrich von Ofterdingen.
Heldenbuch Is the title of a collection of epic poems, belonging
to the cycle of the German Saga.
Heller Glorie schein Bright gloriole.
Hereauf, hierauf Thereupon.
Herout,(Ger. Heraus) Out.
Herr Je,(Ger.) An abbreviation of Herr Jesus (O
Lord!); generally only used by those who are fond of
meaningless exclamations.
Herreliche, herrliche Superb, grand, noble.
Hertsen Herzen; hearts.
Hertzhog, Herzog,(Ger.) Duke.
Herzlich,(Ger.) Hearty.
Herzbruder,(Ger.) Heart's brother.
Hexerei Witchery, sorcery.
Himmel,(Ger.) Heaven.
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GLOSSARY 157
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HimmelsPotzPumpenHerrgott A mild sort of a German imprecation,
untranslatable.
Himmlisch' hoellisch' qual,(Ger.) Heavenlyhellish pain.
Hip Herje! A common interjection.
Hobbiness Happiness.
Hoellisch,(Ger.) Hellish.
Honey fooglin', Honeyfuggle Is believed to be English
slang. In America it means blarneying, deceiving.
Hoockle perry, persimmoned "A huckleberry over my
persimmon." Surpassed, outdone.
Hoofirons,(Hufeisen in Ger.) Horseshoe.
Hoofstad,(Flem.) Capita.
Hopsosa,(Ger.)int. Hop; heyday!
Hunde Dog.
Hundsfott,(Ger. Vulg.) Mean scoundrel, hound.
Hunk,(Amer.) Stout, solid, profitable. "To be all hunk" means to
come out of a speculation with advantage. To be well off.
Hut,(Ger.) Hat.
I Gili romaneskro This song is written in the German gipsy
dialect. Eh! in third line of second verse, is the
German word ehe, "ere," or before. Kuribente
("in war,") is in the Slavonic and gipsy local case,
or as Pott calls it (Die Zigeuner in Europa und Asien)
the Second Dative.
Ik leven,(Flem.) I live.
Il diavolo in carnato,(Ital.) The devil incarnate or in
carnation.
Immer Ever.
In geburst Burst.
In Sang und Klang dein Leben lang,(Ger.) In music and song all
thy life long.
Ita dixit,(Latin) So said.
Jeff A game played by throwing up types, generally for
"refreshments."
Jossstick A name given to small reeds, covered with the dust of
odiferous woods, which the Chinese burn before their idols.
Jungfernkranz,(Ger.) Bridal garland.
Kaiser Karl Charlemagne.
Kalt,(Ger.) Cold.
Kanaster,(Ger.) Canaster tobacco.
Kan ik. Ik kan,(Flem.) I can.
Karfunkelstein,(Ger.) Carbuncle.
Kartoffel,(Ger.) Potato.
KauderWaelsch,(Ger.) Gibberish.
Kellner,(Ger.) Waiter.
Kermes Annual Fair.
Kinder,(Ger.) Children.
Kitin, a kitin Flying or running rapidly.
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GLOSSARY 158
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Klein und gross Small and great.
Kloster,(Ger.) Cloister.
Knasterbart,(Ger.) Literally, tobaccobeard; perhaps denoting a
good old fellow, fond of his pipe.
Kneiperei,(Ger.) Revel.
Knock dem out de shpots Knock the spots out of them; astonish
them.
Koenig Etzel King Attila.
Komm maidelein! Rothe waengelein,(Ger.) Come maiden, red cheeks.
Kong,(Ger. Konig) Old Norse for king.
Kooken Cake.
Kop,(Ger. Kopf) Head.
Kreutzer Frederick Creutzer, distinguished professor in the
University of Heidelberg, author of a great work on "Symbolik."
Krumm,(Ger.) Crooked.
Kummel,(Ger.) Cumin brandy.
Kummel, kimmel,(Ger.) Schnapps, dram. Hans, in his tipsy
enthusiasm, ejaculates, "Oh, mein Gott in Kimmel!" instead of
"im Himmel" (heaven), becoming guilty of an unconscious
alliteration, and confessing, according to the proverb in
vino veritas, where his God really abides; "whose God is
their belly."
Kunster,(Ger.) Sacristan.
Lanze,(Ger.) Lance.
Lager, Lagerbeer, (Ger. Lagerbier, i.e., Stockbeer) Sometimes in
these poems abbreviated into Lager. A kind of beer introduced
into the American cities by the Germans, and now much in vogue
among all classes.
Lager Wirthschaft,(Ger.) Beerhouse.
Laibgartner,(Ger.) Liebgard; bodyguard. The Swiss in blundering
makes it "bodygardener."
Lam To drub, beat soundly.
Larmen The French word larmes, tears, made into a German verb.
Lateinisch Latin.
Laughen, lachen Laughing.
Lavergne A place between Nashville and Murfreesboro', in the
state of Tennessee.
Lebe hoch! Hurrah!
Leben Life; living.
Lebenlang,(Ger.) Lifelong.
Lev'st du nock? Liv'st thou yet?
Libby The notorious Confederate prison at Richmond, Va.
Liddle Pills Little bills, Legislative enactments.
Lieblich,(Ger.) Charming.
Liedeken,(Flem.) Song.
Lieder, Lieds,(Ger.) Songs.
Liederkranz,(Ger.) Gleeunion.
Liederlich,(Ger.) Loose, reckless, dissolute.
Lighthood,(Ger. Lichtheit) Light.
Like spiders down their webs Breitmann's soldiers are supposed to
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GLOSSARY 159
Page No 163
have been expert turners or gymnasts.)
Loafer,(Amer.) A term which, considered as the German
pronunciation of lover, is a close translation of
rom, since this latter means both a gipsy and a
husband.
Los, los gehen,(Ger.) To go at a thing, at somebody.
Loosty,(Ger. Lustig) Jolly, merry.
Loudet,(Lauten in Ger.) To make sound.
L'Ubbriacone,(Ital.) Drunkard.
Luftballon,(Ger.) Airballoon.
Lump,(Ger.) Ragamuffin.
Lumpenglocke An abusive term applied to bells, especially to
those which are rung to give notice that the beerhouses must
close.
Madel,(Ger.) Girl.
Maedchen,(Ger.) Girl, maiden.
Markgraefler A pleasant light wine grown in the Grand Duchy
of Baden.
Marmorbild Marble statue.
Maskenzug,(Ger.) Procession of masked persons.
Massenversammlung,(Ger.) Mass meeting.
Mein Freund My friend.
Mein Sohn My son.
Meine Seel',(Ger.) By my soul.
Meisjes,(Flem.) Girls.
Middleolter(Mittelaelter) The Middle Ages.
Mijn lief gesellen,(Flem.) My dear comrades.
Mineted Minded.
Minnesinger Poet of love. A name given to German lyric poets,
who flourished from the twelfth to the fourteenth centuries.
Misthauf,(Ger.) Dunghill.
Mit hoontin knife, "With her white hands so lovely,
She dug the Count his grave.
From her dark eyes sad weeping,
The holy water she gave."
Old German Ballad.
Mitout Without.
Mitternight, Mitternacht Midnight.
Mitternocht, Mitternacht Midnight.
Mohr, ein schwarzer,(Ger.) A blackamoor.
Moleschott Author of a celebrated work on physiology.
Mondenlight Moonlight.
Mondenschein,(Ger.) Moonlight.
Morgan John Morgan, a notorious Confederate guerilla during the
late war in America.
Morgenhetache Morning headache.
Moskopolite,(Amer.) Cosmopolite. Mossyhead is the German student
phrase for an old student.
Mudsill The longitudinal timber laid upon the ground to form the
foundation for a railway. Hence figuratively applied by the
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GLOSSARY 160
Page No 164
labourdespising Southern gentry to the labouring classes as
the substratum of society.
Murmulte Murmured.
Mutter,(Ger.) Mother.
Naturalizationisds The officers, who give the rights of
native citizens to foreigners.
Nibelungen Lied The lay of the Nibelungen; the great German
national epos.
Nieuw Jarsie New Jersey, in America, famous inter alia for its
sandy beaches and high surf.
Nig Nigger.
Nirwana The Brahminical absorption into God.
Nix,(Ger. Nichts) Nothing.
Nix cum raus That I had not come out.
No sardine Not a narrowminded, smallhearted fellow.
Norate To speak in an oration.
Noth,(Ger.) Need, dire extremity. Das war des Breitmann's Noth,
That was Breitmann's sore trial. Imitated from the last line
of the Nibelungen Lied.
Nun Now.
Nun endlich,(Ger.) Now at last.
O'Brady An Irish giant.
Ochsen,(Ger.) Oxen; stupid fellows. As a verb it also is used
familiarly to mean hard study.
Odenwald A thicklywooded district in South Germany.
Oder Other. See Preface.
Oltra tramontane; ultra tramontane Applied to the nonItalian
Catholic party.
Onbelongs Literal translation of Zugehort.
On de snap All at once.
Ondid to ondo Literal translation of the German
anthun; to donn, to put on.
Onfang,(Ger. Anfang) Beginning.
Oonendly Unendlich.
Oonshpeakbarly,(Ger. unaussprechbarlich) Inexpressibly.
Oopgecleared,(Ger. Aufgeklaert) Enlightened.
Ooprighty,(Ger. Aufrichtig) Upright.
Ooprighthood,(Ger. Aufrichtigkeit) Uprightness.
Oopsproong For aufsprung.
Oppleyack Applejack. Spirit distilled from cider.
Orgelton,(Ger.) Organ sound.
Orkester Orchestra.
Outgepokete Outpoked.
Outsigned,(Ger. ausgezeichnete) Distinguished, signal.
Outsprach Outspoke.
Over again Uebrigen.
Paardeken,(Flemish) Palfrey.
Pabst, Der Pabst lebt, "The Pope he leads a happy life," beginning of a popular German song.
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Palact,(Ger. Pallast) Palace.
Peke Belgian rye whisky.
Peeps People. "Hard on the American peeps" a phrase for
anything exacting or severely pressing.
Pelznickel, Nick, Nickel St. Nicolas, muffled in fur, is one of
the few riders in the army of the saints, but, unlike St.
George and St. Martin, he oftener rides a donkey than a horse,
more especially in that part of the German land which can boast
of having given birth to the illustrious Hans. St. Nicolas is
supposed, on the night preceding his nameday, the sixth of
December, to pass over the housetops on his longeared steed,
and having baskets suspended on either side filled with sweets
and playthings, and to drop down through the chimneys presents
for those children who have been good during the year, but
birchrods for those who have been naughty, would not go to bed
early, or objected to being washed, In the expectation of
his coming, the children put, on the eve of St. Nicolas' day,
either a shoe, or a stocking, or a little basket, into the
chimneypiece of their parents' bedroom. We may remark, by the
way, that St. Nicolas is the Christian successor of the heathen
Nikudr, of ancient German mythology.
Pesser, besser,(Ger.) Better.
Pestain Stain, with the augment.
Pfaelzer A man from the Rhenish Palatinate.
Pfeil,(Ger.) Arrow.
Philosopede Velocipede.
Pickelhaube,(Ger.) The spiked helmet worn by Prussian soldiers.
Pie the forms Break and scatter the forms of types the greatest
disaster conceivable to a true typo.
Pigsticker Bowieknife.
Pileout,(Amer.) Hurry out.
Pimeby By and by.
"Plain" Water plain, i.e., unmixed.
Plue goats Blue coats, soldiers.
Plugmuss Fight for a fireplug. American fireman's language.
Pokal, (Poculum) Goblet.
Poker A favourite game of cards among Western gamblers.
Poonkin Pumpkin.
Popslets Bobsleds. A very rough kind of sledge.
Potzblitz,(Ger.) int., The deuce.
Potztausend! Was ist das? Zounds! What is that?
Poulderie Poultry.
Poussiren To court.
Pretzel,(Ger.) A kind of fancy bread, twist or the like.
Prezackly Pre(cisely), exactly.
Protocollirt, protocolliren To register, record.
Pully, i.e., Bully An Americanism, adjective. Fine,
capital. A slang word, used in the same manner as the
English used the word crack; as, "a bully
horse," "a bully picture."
Pumpernickel A heavy, hard sort of ryebread, made in Westphalia.
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Put der Konig troo To put through, (Amer.), to qualify, to
imitate.
Pye To buy.
Rapp(Rappe) A black horse.
Raushlin', rauschend Rustling.
Reb An abbreviation of rebel.
Redakteur Editor.
Red cock Or make de red cock crow. Einem den rothen
Hahn aufs Dach setzen. A German proverb signifying to set
fire to a house.
Rede,(Ger.) Speech.
RedWaelsch, RothWaelsch,(Ger.) Thieves' language.
Reiten gaen,(Flemish) Go riding.
Reiter,(Ger.) Rider.
Reiver Robber.
Reue,(Ger.) Repentance.
Rheingraf,(Ger.) Count of the Rhine districts.
Rheinweinbechers Klang The Rhine wine goblet's sound.
Richter,(Jean Paul Fr.) A distinguished German author.
Ridersmann,(Reitersmann in Ger.) Rider.
Ring A political clique or cabal.
Ringe,(Ger.) Rings.
Ritter,(Ger.) Knight.
Roland One of the paladins of Charlemagne.
Rolette Roulette.
Rollin' locks Rolling logs, mutually aiding (used only in
politics.)
Rosen,(Ger.) Roses.
Rouse,(Ger. Heraus) Out; come out.
Sachsen Saxonia, Saxony.
Sacrin Consecrating.
Sagen Cyclus Cycle of legends.
Sass, Sassy, Sassin' Sauce, saucy, Sauerkraut,(Ger.) Pickled cabbage.
Saw it Understood it.
Scatterin, Scotterin Scattering.
Schatz Sweetheart.
Schauer,(Ger.) Awe.
Schenk aus,(Ger.) Pour out.
Schenket ein,(Ger.) Pour in (fill the glasses).
Schimmel,(Ger.) Grey horse.
Schimpft und flucht gar laesterlich,(Ger.) Swears and blasphemes
abominably.
Schinken,(Ger.) Ham.
Schlaeger,(Ger.) A kind of sword or broadsword; a rapier used by
students for duelling or fighting matches.
Schlesierwein,(Ger.) Wine grown in Silesia, proverbially sour.
Schlimmer,(Ger.) Worse.
Schlog him ober de kop Knocked him on the head.
Schloss,(Ger.) Castle.
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Schmutz,(Ger.) Dirt.
Schnapps,(Ger.) Dram.
Schnitz Pennsylvania German word for cut and dried fruit.
Schnitz, schnitzen,(Ger.) To chop, chip, snip.
Schonheitsideal,(Ger.) The ideal of beauty.
Schopenhauer A celebrated German "philosophical physiologist."
Schoppen,(Ger.) A liquid measure, chopin, pint.
Schrocken(Erschrocken) Frightened.
Schwaben Suabia.
Schwan,(Ger.) Swan.
Schweinblatt (Swine) Dirty paper.
Schweitzer kase,(Ger.) Swiss cheese.
Schwer,(Ger.) Heavy.
Schwig, Swig, verb. To drink by large draughts.
Schwigs, Swig, n. A large draught.
Schweinpig,(Ger.) Swinepig.
Scoop Take in, get.
Scorched Escorted. A negro malapropism.
Scrouged,(Amer.) Pressed, jammed.
SeelenIdeal Soul's ideal.
Sefenlefen Seven or eleven(minutes).
Seins,(Ger.) The Being.
Selbstanschauungsvermogen,(Ger.) Capacity for selfinspection.
Selfe,(Ger. Selbe) Same.
Serenity A transparency.
Shanty A board cabin. Slang, for house.
Shapel Chapel is an old word for a printingoffice.
Sharman, Sherman German.
Shings Jingo; by jingo.
Shpicket Spigot; a pin or peg to stop a small hole in a cask of
liquor.
Shipsy Gipsy.
Shlide Slide. "Let it slide," vulgar for "let it go."
Shlide,(Amer.) Depart.
Shlished, geschlitzt Slit.
Shlop over Go too far and upset or spill. Applied to men who
venture too far in a success.
Shlopped Slopped.
Shmysed,(Ger. Schmissen, from Schmeissen)
Threw him out of doors.
Shnowwice,(Ger. Schneeweis) Snowwhite.
Shoopider Jupiter.
Shootingstick A shootingstick is used for closing up the form
of types.
Showspiel, Schauspiel Play, piece.
Shpoons Spoons, plunder.
Shtuhl,(Ger. Stuhl) Stool, chair.
Silbern,(Ger.) Silver.
Sinn,(Ger.) Meaning.
Six mals Six times.
Skeeted Went fast, skated(?)
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Skool Skull.
Skyugle,(Amer.) "Skyugle" is a word which had a short run during
1864. It meant many things, but chiefly to disappear or to
make disappear. Thus, a deserter "skyugled," and sometimes he
"skyugled" a coat or watch.
Slanganderin' Foolishly slandering.
Slasher gaffs Spurs for cocks, with cutting edges.
Slibovitz A Bohemian schnapps.
Slumgoozlin' Slum or sham guzzling, humbug.
Slumgullion A Mississippi term for a legislator.
So mit,(Ger.) Thus with.
Solidaten,(Ger. Soldaten) Soldiers.
Sonntag,(Ger.) Sunday.
Soplin A sapling, young tree.
Sottelet,(Ger. Gesattelt) Saddled.
Sound upon the goose Bartlett, in his Dictionary of
Americanisms, states that this phrase originated in the
Kansas troubles, and signified true to the cause
of slavery. But this is erroneous, as the phrase
was common during the native American campaign,
and originated at Harrisburg, as described by Mr. Leland.
Souse und Brouse,(Ger. Saus und Braus) Revelry and rioting.
Speck,(Ger.) Bacon.
Spiel,(Ger.) Play.
Spielman,(Ger.) Musician.
Splodderin' Splattering.
Spook,(Ger. Spuk) A ghost.
Sporn,(Ger.) Spur.
Sports Sporting men.
Squander,(Amer.) Wander. Used in this sense in "The Big Bear of
Arkansas."
Staub,(Ger.) Dust.
Stein,(Ger.) Stone.
Stille,(Ger.) Stillness.
Stim,(Ger. Stimme) Voice.
Stohr Store.
Stone fence,(Amer.) Rye whisky.
"I went in and got a horn
Of old stone fence."
Jim Crow, 1832.
Straaten,(Flem.) Streets.
Stracks Straight ahead, or onwards.
Straight flush In poker, all the cards of one suit.
Strassen,(Ger.) Streets.
Strauss Name of the celebrated Viennese valse player and
composer.
Strumpf,(Ger.) Stocking.
Stunden,(Ger.) Leagues. About four and a half English miles.
Sturm und Drang,(Ger.) Literally Storm and Violence. Sturm und
Drang periode, signifying a particular period of German
literature.
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Sweynheim and Pannartz The first printers at Rome.
Takes Allotments of copy to each printer.
Tantz,(Ger.) Dance.
Tantzen,(Ger.) To dance.
Tarnal Eternal.
Taub, Taube,(Ger.) Dove.
Taugenix, Taugenichts Goodfornothing fellow.
Teufelsjagersmann Devil's huntsman.
Theil,(Ger.) Part.
Thoom Thumb.
Thrip,(Southern Amer.) Threepence.
Thusnelda The wife of Arminius,(Hermann,) the Duke of the
Cheruskans and conqueror of Varus.
Tie a dog loose. Losbinden
Tiger An American term for a gambling table.
Tixey "I wish I was in Dixie." The origin of this song
is rather curious. Although now thoroughly adopted as a
Southern song, and "Dixie's Land" understood to mean the
Southern States of America, it was, about a century ago,
the estate of one Dixie, on Manhattan Island, who treated
his slaves well; and it was their lament, on being deported
south, that is now known as "I wish I was in Dixie."
Todt,(Ger.) Dead.
Todtengrips, Todtengerippe Skeleton.
Tofe Dove.
To House,(Ger. zu Hause) At home.
Tortled To tortle, to move off. From turtle.
Touch the dirt Touch the road.
Treppe Stairs.
Treu,(Ger.) Faithful, true.
Throw him with ecks Pelt him with eggs.
Turchin Colonel Turchin's men ravaged the town of Huntsville
(Ala.) during the civil war.
Turkas Turquoise.
Turner,(Ger.) Gymnast.
Turner Verein,(Ger. Turnverein) Gymnastic Society.
Tyfel, Teufel Devil.
Tyfeled, Verteufelt Devilish.
Tyfelfest From Teufel, here in the sense of "best" or "worst."
Tyfelshnake, Teufelsschnaken Devilries.
Tyfelstrikes, Teufelsstreiche Devilstrokes.
Tyfelwards Devilwards.
Uber Stein and Schwein,(Ger.) Over stone and swine.
Ueberschwengliche,(Ger.) Transcendental, elevated.
Uhr,(Ger.) Clock, watch, hour, time. Used for "hour" in the
ballad.
Uhu,(Ger.) Owl.
Uliverus Oliver, another of the twelve Paladins of Charlemagne,
who fell at Roncesvalles (a Roland for an Oliver).
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Und lauter guter Ding,(Ger.) And of thoroughly good cheer.
Unwindoong,(Ger. Entwicklung?) Unravelling.
Unvolkommene technik Unfinished style or method.
Urbummeleid,(Ger. vulg.) Archloafer's song.
Urlied,(Ger.) The song of yore.
Van't klein komt men tot't groote,(Dutch) Great things have small
beginnings. (Concordia res parvae crescunt Legend on the
Dutch ducats; or "Magna molimur parvi.")
Varus The Roman commander in Germany, conquered by Arminius.
Veilchen,(Ger.) Violets.
Vercieren,(Flem.) Adorn; exalt.
Verdammt,(Ger.) Dd.
Verfluchter,(Ger.) Accursed.
Verloren,(Ger.) Forlorn.
Verstay, Verstehen Understand.
Versteh, Verstehen,(Ger.) To understand.
Vertyfeln, Verteufeln To botch.
Villiam William Street at New York, inhabited by many Germans.
Vivat! The same as vive! in French. Hurrah!
Vlaemsche Flemish.
Von One. See Preface.
Voonderly,(Ger. Wunderlich) Wondrous, curious.
Voruber,(Ger.) Past.
Wachsen,(Ger.) Waxen.
Wachsen,(Ger.) To grow.
"Komm'ich in's galante Sachsen
Wo die schone Maedchen wachsen."
Old German Song.
Waechter,(Ger.) Watchman.
Waelder,(Ger.) Woods.
Wahlverwandtschaft,(Ger.) Elective affinity, sympathy of souls.
Wahrsagt,(Ger. Wahrsagen) To foretell, soothsay.
Waidmannsheil,(Ger.) Huntsman's weal.
Wald,(Ger.) Wood.
Wallowin Walloon.
Walschen,(Ger.) Of the Latin race.
Wappenshield(Waffenschild) Coat of arms.
Ward all zu Steine,(Ger.) Became all stone.
Ward zu Wind,(Ger.) Became a wind.
Wechselbalg,(Ger.) (formerly a popular superstitious belief), a
changeling, brat, urchin.
Weihnachtsbaum,(Ger.) Christmas tree.
Weihnachtslied,(Ger.) Christmas song.
Weingarts, weingarten,(Ger.) Vineyards.
Weingeist,(Ger.) Vinous, ardent spirit.
Weinhandle,(Ger. Weinhandel or Weinhandlung)
Winetrade, wineshop.
Weinnachtstraum Lit. Winenight's dream, for "Weihnacht,"
Christmas dream.
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Wellen und Wogen,(Ger.) Waves and billows.
Welshhen Turkey hen.
Werda?(Ger.) Who's there?
Werden, das Werden The becoming to be.
Wete(Wette) Bet.
We'uns, you'ns We and you. A common vulgarism
through the Southern States.
"'Tis sad that we'uns from you'ns parts
When you'ns hev stolen we'uns' hearts.
Wie gehts,(Ger.) How goes it? How are you?
Wie Milch und Blut Like milk and blood.
Wild und Weh,(Ger.) Wild and woebegone.
Wilde Jagd Wild hunt.
Willkomm,(Ger.) Welcome.
Windsbraut,(Ger. poet) Storm, hurricane, gust of wind.
Wird,(Ger.) Becomes.
Wisehood,(Ger. Weisheit) Wisdom.
Wised,(Ger. Wusste, from wissen) Knew.
Witz,(Ger.) A sally.
Wo bist du?(Ger.) Where art?
Woemoody,(Ger. Wehmuthig) Moanful, doleful.
Wohl,(Ger.) Well!
Wohlauf,(Ger.) Well, come on, cheer up.
Wolfsschlucht,(Ger.) Wolf's glen.
Wonnevol,(Ger. Wonnevoll) Blissful.
Woon,(Ger. Wunde) Wound.
Wordblay Wordplay, pun, quibble.
Wunderscheen(Wunderschoen) Very beautiful.
Wurst A German student word for indifference.
Wurst,(Ger.) Sausage.
Yaeger,(Ger.) Huntsman.
Yaegersmann, Jaegersmann Huntsman.
Yager,(Jager, Ger.) Hunter.
Yar,(Ger. Jahr) Year.
Yartausend, Jahrtausend A thousand years.
Yellow pine Mulatto.
Yonge maegden,(Flem.) Young girls.
"I lost a maiden in that hour." Byron.
Yoompers Jumpers. Rude sledges.
Yungling, Jungling,(Ger.) Youth.
Zapfet aus,(Ger.) Tap the barrel.
Zigeuner Gipsy.
Zimmer,(Ger.) Room.
Zukunftig,(Ger.) In future.
1. Liederchor is the word which serves as a basis for this
designation.
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2. Studio auf einer Reis',
Lebet halt auf auf eig'ner Weis'
Hungrig hier und hungrig dort,
Ist des Burschens Logungswort.
This, with the other verses, may be found in the German Student's
"Commersbucher."
3. Bachtallo dschaven is the prose form. Vide Pott's
Zigeuner.
4. Stinging. An amusing instance of "Breitmannism" was
shown in the fact that an American German editor, in his
ignorance of English, actually believed that the word stinging,
as here given, meant stinking, and was accordingly
indignant. It is needless to say that no such idea was intended
to be conveyed.
5. Then only you will be ready in German.
6. In Music and Song all thy life long.
7. Thy feet are white as chalk, my love,
Thy arms are ivory bone,
Thy body is all satin soft,
Thy breast of marble stone
@ @ @ @ @ @
Smooth, tender, pure, and fair.
Liederbuch Pauls von der Helst, 1602
8. Slibovitz.
9. The author does not know who wrote the first part of "Die
Schone Wittwe." It appeared about 1856, and "went the round
of the papers," accumulating as it went several additions
or rejoinders, one of which was that by Hans Breitmann.
10. I had not seen for many days
The handsome widow's face;
I saw her last night standing
By her counter, full of grace.
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With cheeks as pure as milk and blood,
With eyes so bright and blue,
I kissed her full well six times,
Indeed, and that is true.
11. This ballad is a parody of Das Hildebrandslied. Consult
Wackernagel's Lesebuch and Das klein Heldenbuch.
"Ich vill zum Land ausreiten,
Sprach sich Maister Hilteprand."
12. The Republicans in America were for a long time ridiculed by their
opponents as if professing to be guided by Moral Ideas, i.e.
Emancipation, Progress, Harmony of Interests,
13. Gling, glang, gloria, was a common refrain in the 16th
century, in German drinking songs. "Gling, glang, glorian, Die
Sau hat ein Panzer an." Tractatus de Ebrietate Vitanda.
14. The boot was a favourite drinking cup during the Middle Ages.
The writer has seen a bootshaped mug, bearing the inscription,
"Wer . sein . Stiefel . nit . trinken . kan .
Der . ist . furwahr . kein . Teutscher . man."
There is an allusion to this bootcup in Longfellow's "Golden
Legend," where mention is made of a jolly companion
"who could pull
At once a postilion's jackboot full,
And ask with a laugh, when that was done,
If they could not give him the other one."
15. The German equivalent for a native of Little Pedlington. It is
a Suabian joke, commemorated in a popular song, to inquire in
foreign and remote regions, "Is there any good fellow from
Boblingen here?"
16. "Sonst etwas auf dem Rohr habem" something else on the pipe
or tube meaning a plan or idea, kept to one's self, is a German
proverbial expression, which occurs in one of Langbein's humorous
lyrics.
17. "Nom de garce," as an anagram of nom de grace,
occurs in Rabelais. G
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GLOSSARY 170
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18. An expression only used in reference to seeing again some
jolly old friend after long absence "Uns kommt der alte
Schwed."
19. Wurst, literally sausage, is used by German students
to signify indiffer ence. When a sausage is on the table, and
one is asked with mock courtesy which part he prefers, he
naturally replies "Why, it is all sausage to me." I have heard
an elderly man in New England reply to the query whether he would
have "black meat or breast" "Any part, thank'ee I guess it's
all turkey." There are, of course, divers ancient and
quaint puns in Pennsylvania, on such a word as wurst. Thus
it is said that a northern pedlar, in being served with some
sausage of an inferior quality, was asked again if he would have
some of the wurst. Not understanding the word, and
construing it as a slight, he replied to his hostess "No, thank
you, marm, this is quite bad enough." The literal meaning of
this line, which is borrowed from Scheffel's poem of Perkeo, is
"indifferent, and equal, to me."
20. It was, I believe, Ragnar Lodbrog who, in his Death Song,
spoke, about as intelligently and clearly as Herr Breitmann, of a
mass of weapons.
21. Is true artenjoyment.
22. Where art thou Breitmann? Believe it.
23. In the green wood.
24. Students in the streets.
25. Oh Fatherland! how thou art far!
Oh Time! how art thou long!
26. Full details of this excursion were published in a pamphlet,
entitled "Three Thousand Miles in a Railroad Car," and also in
letters written by Mr. J. G. Hazzard for the New York
Tribune.
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GLOSSARY 171
Page No 175
27. In AmericanGerman festivals, cards are sometimes sold by the
quantity, which are "good" for refreshments. This is done to
avoid trouble in making change.
28. Breitmann and brideman, breit and krumm (bride and groom),
or broad and crooked,
29. This refers to the passage of bills in the Legislature of a
state by means of bribery. In Pennsylvania, as in many other
states, bills which have "nothing in them" i.e. no money
are rarely allowed to pass.
30. "Die Welt gleicht einer Bierbouteille."
31. Harrisburg is the capital of the state of Pennsylvania.
32. In a certain edition of the Breitmann Ballads, this phrase is
said to have originated in 1845. In 1835, I heard it said that
General Jackson in a letter spelt all correct "oll
korrekt," and this I believe to be the real origin of
the expression. C.G.L.
33. This incident, and the one narrated in the preceding verse,
are literally true.
34. "No more interlect than a halfgrown shad," is a phrase which
occurs, if the author remembers aright, in the Charcoal Sketches,
by J. C. Neal. The Western people have carried this idea a step
further, and applied it to sardines, as "small fishes," all of an
average size, packed closely together in tin cans and excluded
from the light of day. A man who has never travelled, and has
during all his life been packed tightly among those who were his
equals in ignorance and inexperience, is therefore a "sardine."
35. The incident narrated in this part, is told in Pennsylvania
as having occurred to a wellknown politician, who bore the
sobriquet of "With all due deference," from his habit of
beginning all his speeches with these words.
36. "Dese outpressions ish not to pe angeseen py anypodies ash
schvearin, boot ash inderesdin Norse or Sherman idioms. Goot
many refiewers vot refiewsed to admire soosh derms in de earlier
editions ish politelich requestet to braise dem in future nodices
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GLOSSARY 172
Page No 176
from a transcendental philological standpoint." FRITZ
SCHWACKENHAMMER
37. Requisish. An abbreviation of the word
requisition, which Breitmann had heard during the War of
Emancipation. I once heard this cant term used in a droll
manner, about the end of the war, by a little girl, six years
old, the daughter of a quartermaster. She had "confiscated," or
"foraged," or "skirmished," as it was indifferently called, a toy
whip belonging to her little brother of four years, who was
clamorously demanding its return. "I cannot let you have the
whip," said she gravely, "as I need it for military purposes; but
I can give you a requisish for it on my papa, who will give you
an order on the United States Government." C. G. L.
38. Bismarck.
39. Disraeli.
40. Uhu. An owl the bird of knowledge.
41. Allons. Uhlan slang for go or went, as
in America, they use the Spanish word vamos to express
every person in every sense of the verb to go. Pronounced
allon'd.
42. "O no, those are no angels
Which sail so smoothly on,
O no they're cursed Frenchmen,
All in an airballoon."
43. "And when she came adown
Unto the earth's firm surface,
She was Mrs. Robinson."
44. Those are thrashed Frenchmen.
45. "Der Uhlan was not shenerally wear pickelhaube, but dis tay
der Herr Breitmann gehappenet to hafe von on." FRITZ
SCHWACKENHAMMER
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GLOSSARY 173
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46. "And art thou truly living?"
47. "All my property."
48. "O maiden fair in Heaven!"
49. Nancy, the "light of love" of Lorraine. London
Times, Dec. 6, 1870.
50. "I require you to surrender:
I have thirty thousand men
Not far from here, parbleu!
But give me first champagne:
I've a wondrous thirst, you know
About a dozen cartloads;
And then I'll let you go."
51. "O Lord, Lord, Lord!
We are ruined!"
52. "We will take the ready gelt."
53. "Yes, give a hundred thousand francs
'Tis all to me, you know."
54. "Ah, that will make you trouble,
Which I would not gladly see;
So follow all my counsels,
And take advice from me.
I have two thousand bottles,
The best"
55. "From the wrath of the Northmen, deliver us, Lord!"
56. There is a German student's song which begins with this
couplet.
57. La Redoute the gamblingroom at Spa.
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GLOSSARY 174
Page No 178
58. Spa is famous for painted ornamental wooden ware, such as
fans and boxes.
59. "And to him who sung this song,
God give a happy year!"
60. "If wine is better than loving,
Or if love doth much more than wine."
61. "Yes, when the flower is plucked,
And taken from the stem."
62. "What is sweeter than this drinking?
Yes naught can better be
Naught is sweeter, though, than loving;
It tastes better than wine to me.
There's nothing like the maidens,
There's nothing like good beer,
And he who does not love them both
Can be no cavalier."
63. "The colours are not unknown to me."
64. "Ils etaient deux alors; ils sont mille aujourd'hui.
Sur ces temps primitifs le doux progres a lui,
Et chacque jour le Rhin vers Cologne charrie
De nombreux Farinas, tous 'seul, 'tous 'Jean Marie.'"
Le Maout,"Le Parfumeur," cited by Eugene Rimmel
in Le Livre des Parfums, Paris, 1870.
65. Bierstadt Herr Schwackenhammer had evidently here in
view, not only the American artist BIERSTADT, but also the great
city of Munich, specially famous for its manufacture of beer.
66. Rattenkonig, or Ratking, is a term applied in German to a
droll mixture of incidents or details. It is derived from an
extraordinary story of twelve rats, with one (their king) in the
centre, which were found in a nest with their tails grown
together, firmly as the ligament which connects the Siamese
Twins.
67. "Lucifers." The first name applied in America to friction
The Breitmann Ballads
GLOSSARY 175
Page No 179
matches, and one still used by many people.
68. Scalawag an American word, of very doubtful origin,
signifying a low, worthless fellow.
69. "If we can in our monastery collect our rents, we do not care
a red cent for infallibility."
70. This verse is parodied from the lines of a ribald old Latin
song, "Viginti Jesuiti nuper convenere."
71. "If I could throw myself outside of, or around, a glass of
Rhenish wine." "If I could see a glass of whisky," said an
American, "I'd throw myself outside of it mighty quick." Since
writing the above, I have seen the expression thus given in a
copy of La Belle Sauvage. Bill of the Play, London, June 27,
1870.
"Nay these natives simple creatures
Had resolved that for the future
Each his own canoe would paddle,
Each his own hoecake would gobble,
And get outside his own whisky."
72. "Deus se fecit olim homo," A very curious epigram to this
effect was placed upon "Pasquin" while the writer was in Rome,
during a past winter. It was as follows: "Perche Eva mangio il
pomo Iddio per riscattarci si fece uomo, Ed ora il Nono Pio Per
mantenerci schiavi, si fa Dio."
73. M'Closky. An Irish adventurer, admirably depicted by Mr.
Charles Lever.
74. "Do you not see that if you are infallible, and wish to give
it out."
75. "During its life."
76. "Thou art a very puppy."
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GLOSSARY 176
Page No 180
77. This was the late Charles Astor Bristed of New York, to whom
many of these ballads were addressed in letters.
78. Lines from Gudrun, each of which is freely translated by the
lines following it.
79. "Go forth, my book, through all the world,
Bear what thy fate may be!
They may bite thee, they may tear thee,
So they do no harm to me!"
80. "Pull on your boots so rough and tough,
And whet your sword beside,
We have been lazy long enough,
The road is worth the ride."
81. Schicksal, Destiny.
82. Menschheitsideal, Human Ideal.
83. A little stream in Cincinnati, beyond which lies the German
quarter, is known as the Rhine.
84. That was a dark young gypsy.
85. Ah, Rosalie, my lovely one!
86. Bloodcoloured is the lovely rose.
87. Who roses picks his finger pricks
No matter what befall;
In wintertime he finds them gone
And gets no rose at all.
Our petting and caressing here,
Our joy or misery
It all shall rest sub rosa, love,
And our own secret be!
88. "Thou'rt right, my darling son."
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GLOSSARY 177
Page No 181
89. "Goodbye, my friend, my Frederick!"
90. Woppenshield, coat of arms.
The Breitmann Ballads
GLOSSARY 178
Bookmarks
1. Table of Contents, page = 3
2. The Breitmann Ballads, page = 5
3. Charles G. Leland, page = 5
4. Preface To the Edition of 1889., page = 7
5. PREFACE, page = 8
6. INTRODUCTION BY THE PUBLISHER, page = 9
7. HANS BREITMANN'S BARTY., page = 13
8. BREITMANN AND THE TURNERS., page = 14
9. BALLAD., page = 16
10. A BALLAD APOUT DE ROWDIES., page = 17
11. THE PICNIC, page = 18
12. I GILI ROMANESKRO., page = 20
13. STEINLI VON SLANG., page = 21
14. TO A FRIEND STUDYING GERMAN., page = 26
15. LOVE SONG, page = 28
16. DER FREISCHUTZ, page = 29
17. WEIN GEIST, page = 32
18. SCHNITZERL'S PHILOSOPEDE., page = 34
19. I. PROLOGUE., page = 34
20. II. HANS BREITMANN AND HIS PHILOSOPEDE., page = 36
21. DIE SCHONE WITTWE[9], page = 42
22. I. VOT DE YANKEE CHAP SUNG., page = 42
23. II. HOW DER BREITMANN CUT HIM OUT., page = 43
24. BREITMANN IN BATTLE, page = 43
25. BREITMANN IN MARYLAND., page = 46
26. BREITMANN AS A BUMMER, page = 48
27. SECOND PART., page = 49
28. BREITMANN'S GOING TO CHURCH., page = 51
29. BREITMANN IN KANSAS.[26], page = 58
30. HANS BREITMANN'S CHRISTMAS., page = 61
31. BREITMANN ABOUT TOWN, page = 64
32. BREITMANN IN POLITICS., page = 68
33. I.-THE NOMINATION, page = 68
34. 2. - THE COMMITTEE OF INSTRUCTION., page = 69
35. 3. - MR. TWINE EXPLAINS BEING "SOUND UPON THE GOOSE.", page = 70
36. 4.-HOW BREITMANN AND SMITH WERE REPORTED TO BE LOG-ROLLING, page = 72
37. 5.-HOW THEY HELD THE MASS MEETING., page = 73
38. 6.-BREITMANN'S GREAT SPEECH., page = 74
39. THE AUTHOR ASSERTS THE VAST INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY OF GERMANS TO AMERICANS., page = 76
40. SHOWING HOW MR. HIRAM TWINE "PLAYED OFF" ON SMITH.[35], page = 77
41. BREITMANN AS AN UHLAN., page = 80
42. I. THE VISION., page = 81
43. II. BREITMANN IN A BALLOON., page = 83
44. III. BREITMANN AND BOUILLI., page = 87
45. IV. BREITMANN TAKES THE TOWN OF NANCY., page = 89
46. V. BREITMANN IN BIVOUAC., page = 92
47. VI. BREITMANN'S LAST PARTY., page = 94
48. EUROPE., page = 97
49. BREITMANN IN PARIS., page = 97
50. BREITMANN IN LA SORBONNE., page = 99
51. BREITMANN IN FORTY-EIGHT., page = 101
52. BREITMANN IN BELGIUM., page = 104
53. SPA., page = 104
54. OSTENDE., page = 107
55. GENT., page = 109
56. BREITMANN IN HOLLAND., page = 110
57. 'S GRAVENHAGE - THE HAGUE., page = 110
58. LEYDEN., page = 111
59. SCHEVENINGEN, OR DE MAIDEN'S COORSE., page = 112
60. AMSTERDAM., page = 115
61. GERMANY., page = 117
62. BREITMANN AM RHEIN - COLOGNE., page = 117
63. AM RHEIN. - No. II., page = 120
64. AM RHEIN. - No. III., page = 122
65. MUNICH., page = 123
66. FRANKFORT-ON-THE-MAIN., page = 126
67. ITALY., page = 127
68. BREITMANN IN ROME., page = 127
69. LA SCALA SANTA., page = 131
70. BREITMANN INTERVIEWS THE POPE., page = 132
71. THE FIRST EDITION OF BREITMANN. SHOWING HOW AND WHY IT WAS THAT IT NEVER APPEARED., page = 134
72. BREITMANN'S LAST BALLADS., page = 140
73. BREITMANN IN TURKEY., page = 140
74. COBUS HAGELSTEIN., page = 144
75. FRITZERL SCHNALL., page = 145
76. THE GYPSY LOVER., page = 147
77. DORNENLIEDER., page = 148
78. BREITMANN'S SLEIGH-RIDE., page = 150
79. THE MAGIC SHOES., page = 152
80. GLOSSARY, page = 155