Welcome to
The king's meaning of
How to kick someone's ASS!
______________________________ This letter should not be read by Minors! Or those Sick in the Head!!! Welcome back to another one of the King's addition of Violence. This a good way to deffand your-self if you come to a situation and you must use physical force. Now just follow these rules when you fight and you might just Win. but only if you know what to do!

1. If some jerky comes up to you and tells you to fuck right off you can do one of two things. you can a: insult him back or b: hit him hard in the gut.
2. If you did A in number one you can expect him to hit you. Look at his hands, the one you see moving back is the one that is going to hit you with, so look and when he pulls it up move your hand up and block it. Then with your other free hand hit him on the jaw! (if you put a lot of power into it you might even knock him out!)
3. If you did B in number one and he doesn't hit you back and runs/walks away then you might get charged! But if he hits you back then grab his shirt collar with your weak hand and with your powerful hand hit him non-stop in the jaw,nose, or forehead (constant hitting in these areas may make him k.o. (k.o.=knock out!)
4. Now let me tell you about weapons (since the rest is based on weapons!) anything can be a weapon when you fight! Even a simple twig! How can a twig be a weapon you ask? Well, if you are on the ground, get up holding the twig and stab him in the leg! (he wont kick your ass anymore! trust me on that one!)
Well back to weapons! If you're walking along the side-walk and some one grabs you around the neck holding a knife and threating to cut your neck grab his arm, lung the arm stright over your shoulder and pull it down (you will snap elbow at the joint.)
5. If some one is holding a knife to you (must be a few inches from you) as he blinks use your right hand to hit him right on the palm, as your doing that, with your left hit him on the knuckles of the same hand. If you hit him hard enough, you'll pop his hand off the socket! As he is screaming grab his head pull it down towards your waste lift your knee and slam it in his face (the fucker will go down! then you can call the cops or steel his money and WALK away! If you run, some one will call the cops on you. Only run if the cops are coming after you.!
6. THE BATTLE IN THE SCOOL YARD!
If the bully picks on you, you must kick his ass for the chicks/guys there. When he comes towards you he might want something in your lunch- box. But what he doesn't know WILL hurt him! Get your mom's  HOT, REALLY HOT coffee in your thermos.  As he grabs you, tell him you got some good Necter to offer him. as he looks throw the coffee in his face.  As he grabs his face knee him in the balls. He'll go down! If you really hate him,  grab a hand full of sand and put in his mouth. If he is k.o'ed, kick him in the ribs! When the cops come, tell them it was Self Defense! You'll get off scot- free and you'll have all the chicks/guys!!
7. When on the street and some punk comes up to you and wants to fuck you up, hit him in the nose with all your might (I had fights with these ass holes and they are really hard! Its like their bones won't break. I only lost once to them and thats because I had a few jump me as he was losing. If you don't have a lot experience, run from them.) Well I will tell you what to do if you are experienced. Grab any thing hard near by and SMACK the fuck'in guy in the head! When the others rush you Kick,Smack,And hit anywhere., where ever you land them is good! (hope you can take them?!?)

PS (from the fly) The king is a good fighter, dont take this as a joke! We spent a lot of hard work on this (the fighting and all!) so if you get in a fight and use this and lose don't blame us. It's your fault becasue you might not be experienced enough! So be ready for a fight! (I know i am!)! the king